Who Are We Feeding?

“An old Cherokee man told his grandson, ‘..My boy, there is a great battle between two wolves that live inside us all. One is evil–it is anger, jealousy, greed, lies, resentment, regret, and arrogance. The other is good– it is joy, love, peace, hope, kindness, humility, empathy, and truth.’ The boy thought for awhile, and then he asked, ‘ Grandfather, which wolf wins the great battle?’ The wise old man replied quietly, ‘The one you feed.'”
The Story of the Two Wolves– a Cherokee legend

“Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. ²⁰Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. ²¹Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be. ²²“Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light. ²³But when your eye is unhealthy, your whole body is filled with darkness. And if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is! ²⁴“No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money. ²⁵“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? ²⁶Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? ²⁷Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?²⁸“And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, ²⁹yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. ³⁰And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? ³¹“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ ³²These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. ³³Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.
Matthew 6:19-33 NLT

Just a short while ago, I published a blog entry called, “You Are Not What You Eat.” But sometimes, you DO become what you consume. I’m not talking literally about food, but figuratively you become what you read, and listen to, and spend time and money on– what you consume can end up consuming You!

“Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”
― Lao Tzu

Just like the two wolves in the Cherokee legend, there are two forces at work inside us. The Bible calls them “flesh” and “spirit.” The Apostle Paul also writes about this great battle:

¹⁵For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. ¹⁶Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. ¹⁷So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. ¹⁸For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. ¹⁹For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. ²⁰Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.
Romans 7:15-20 ESV

We all start with “good intentions.” We want to be known as a “good person.” We want to have healthy relationships. We want the trust and respect of others. But Sin works in us against our own good intentions. We get hurt, so we lash out in anger. We see others achieving success or enjoying benefits we think we should have, and we become envious or resentful. We allow fear, greed, or bitterness to overpower us. We lie, or we isolate ourselves from others. We give up in despair, or reject the help and advice of those who want what’s best for us. We rely on our own resources and “will power” to achieve success, even to lose weight– but we always seem to fall short! We compare ourselves to others– sometimes ending in arrogance and apathy, sometimes ending in shame and humiliation.

But the battleground is not always so obvious as arrogance or despair, hurting others or being victimized. Who are we feeding in those moments of relaxation and ease? Are we scrolling through websites that waste our valuable time or encourage us to devalue others around us? Are we listening to music that encourages us to anger and pleasing ourselves at any expense? Are we reading books or watching movies that honor God? Are we spending money in ways that please Him? Are we spending our “down” time on our knees? Who are we feeding when times are tough? Are we spending time worrying or scurrying around trying to “make things happen” a certain way? Are we grateful, or fearful? Are we terrified or trusting? Our small choices in things that don’t seem to matter can start to change the way we think, and speak, act, and live.

There IS a great battle. But there are also tiny battles in the little moments of our day: opportunities to inch closer to God or to lose ground to the distractions and temptations of the world. And on our own, we will lose the battle, for the “flesh” will conspire to steal even the “good” food we think we are feeding ourselves. Thankfully, Christ came to feed the “good wolf.” In following Christ; in developing a relationship with Him, we allow His Spirit to nourish us. He is the “bread of life.” He is the “living water.” He alone provides the power to win the battle. Paul follows up in Romans by saying:

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. ²⁷And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. ²⁸And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. ²⁹For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. ³⁰And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.
Romans 8 26-30 ESV

So who are we feeding today? Or rather, who is feeding us? What are we consuming, and is it consuming us in turn? I hope we are feeding on God’s Word today, and walking with Him in each moment– whether in quiet reflection or in desperate need. May we be nourished and satisfied as we walk forward with Him!

November 3, 2023 0

God Is Not Color-blind

My father was color-blind. He could distinguish the color red, but all other colors registered as shades of gray. Certain forms of colorblindness are treatable today, but Dad went through his whole life not seeing most colors. He knew the sky as light or dark, not piercing blue or deep blue or sunset indigo. He even told people his eyes were brown, because he couldn’t see how startlingly, wonderfully blue they were. He was cautious about getting dressed for events and such, worried that he would “clash.” He generally preferred neutrals. He liked that his company provided uniforms– it was much easier that way.

As I write this, I am looking out the window at a cornucopia of colors on the autumn trees– glowing shades of orange, deep reds, bright yellows, a few dark browns, and even some leaves still vibrant green. Autumn has come late this year, and the cold weather will bleed all the colors and cause the leaves to fall into a single great carpet (except where rakes gather them up into piles). It is marvelous to see so much variety in the individual trees; so much color and life, and beauty. God loves color! He loves to dazzle with surprising touches of unique shades, designs, and combinations. Towering trees with golden leaves, shorter, squat bushes with fiery reds, evergreens providing contrast. And in a few weeks, it will all be a memory, as leaves give way to snow-covered branches, and ice-trimmed bushes.

It made me think of the marvelous variety of people in our world. Each one unique, beautiful, and precious in God’s eyes. We tend to waste so much of our time comparing ourselves to others. Sometimes we wish we were like “them”– taller or darker, blue-eyed, or thinner, with hair that is curlier or blonder or just different from what God created. We feel that our bodies are “not good enough,” or not “right.” We long to be something else; someone else. At other times, we judge others by similarly narrow standards. “They” don’t look like us; they are “not good enough,” or “inferior” in some way. Of course, we don’t like to admit to any hint of bigotry or prejudice. We like to say that we are “color-blind” when it comes to people.

But God is not color-blind. He is deeply away of all the genetic differences in our skin and eyes and hair; all the high cheekbones and stubby fingers and freckles that are passed from generation to generation in some of our families. And God approves! God loves us all the same– lavishly, intimately, eternally! Just like the colors on the trees, God delights in our variety and differences– our “crooked” teeth; our “large” noses, our “mousey” brown hair, our “wide” hips. After all– He planned each one! He designed each of us to be who we are–from our bodies to our talents to our personalities. And someday, in Heaven, we will all be as one–not divided or obsessed with our “deficiencies” or differences, but united in our love and worship as never before– a great carpet of redeemed souls, spread around the Throne of God!

God isn’t color-blind; and neither should we be. We should celebrate each other, encourage each other, and love each other for who God made us to be. Sometimes, that can be difficult in our fallen world. Hurting people, fearful people, angry people– they may not be easy to love. They may judge us, reject us, even persecute us unfairly. But that’s not God’s original intention or purpose. We were meant to add our own unique beauty to an equally beautiful world.

Let’s pray that God would teach us how to show our “true colors” to the world, and reflect the beauty He planted in each one of us today!

October 30, 2023 0

As In the Days of Noah

We’re getting some rain outside as I write this. Not pouring rain; nor torrential rain; just a steady drizzle. But it looks as though we will get rain for another two days at least. Without stop. Cloudy, wet, chilly, dreary weather.

The news has been dreary, too. War, political upheaval, economic disaster looming, and general unrest. And it isn’t just localized. There is trouble everywhere, and, seemingly, all the time. And yet…events march along as though things are normal– as though the future will be bright tomorrow. There are festivals being planned (some with rain dates, others may be cancelled or lightly attended if the rain continues or worsens); people seem to be in the same hurrying, scurrying rhythm as yesterday. Some complain, or seem a bit oppressed, but most don’t even comment on the catastrophic events unfolding around us. They buy and sell, eat and drink, and rush to and fro like always.

There seems to be a universal weariness– people are tired of bad news, anger, protests, and arguing, but no one seems to want to DO anything positive, unless it is to live in denial of what is actually happening. “Oh, they are just exaggerating.” “That might happen elsewhere, but it will never happen HERE!” “Things will work out– we just need to wait it out.”

It reminds me of the warning of Jesus in Matthew 24:

For as in those days before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day when Noah entered the ark, ³⁹and they were unaware until the flood came and swept them all away, so will be the coming of the Son of Man.
Matthew 24:38-39 ESV

While I can listen to or watch bad news unfolding, it hasn’t impacted me directly. I don’t have to worry about bombs coming into my neighborhood (at least, I’m not expecting any today); I haven’t lost my home or a loved one in the past week. I watch the clouds and rain from the safety of a warm, dry apartment. It is easy to become apathetic. And, if I think about any of it, it is easy enough to say a quick prayer for “others” “over there.”

But I’m not building an ark. Jesus’s warning was not to “toss off a quick prayer” as we see signs of danger and await His return. Prayer is important, but it isn’t something to be done lightly. Living for Christ is more than wearing the name “Christ Follower” and a t-shirt or cross necklace. When was the last time I spent an hour in earnest prayer? When was the last time I fasted? When was the last time I felt compelled to act for the cause of Christ?

I’m not surprised that most people walk around angry, or apathetic about the state of the world. But as Christians, we should be working to make a visible difference. And that means our prayers must also be different than the comfortable “good wish” prayers that many of us (and I must include myself) often practice.

In the days of Noah, people were going about their daily lives without any clue of the horrors to come. And yet, there were signs, even then. There was evil everywhere– corruption, fighting, cheating, lies, danger, disease, famine, and oppression. But only Noah was building an Ark. He wasn’t caught up in watching CNN or trolling the internet, but he also wasn’t leading an “ordinary” life. His life stood out, because he listened to God. He was focused on what really mattered– saving those who would enter the Ark and survive the judgment to come. The Ark had room for more people– but they refused the invitation. Maybe they had a dentist appointment scheduled for that day; maybe they didn’t want to miss their “girls day out.” Perhaps they were planning a fishing trip or they were buying a house.

But he said to him, “A man once gave a great banquet and invited many. ¹⁷And at the time for the banquet he sent his servant to say to those who had been invited, ‘Come, for everything is now ready.’ ¹⁸But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said to him, ‘I have bought a field, and I must go out and see it. Please have me excused.’ ¹⁹And another said, ‘I have bought five yoke of oxen, and I go to examine them. Please have me excused.’ ²⁰And another said, ‘I have married a wife, and therefore I cannot come.’ ²¹So the servant came and reported these things to his master. Then the master of the house became angry and said to his servant, ‘Go out quickly to the streets and lanes of the city, and bring in the poor and crippled and blind and lame.’ ²²And the servant said, ‘Sir, what you commanded has been done, and still there is room.’ ²³And the master said to the servant, ‘Go out to the highways and hedges and compel people to come in, that my house may be filled. ²⁴For I tell you, none of those men who were invited shall taste my banquet.’”
Luke 14:16-35 ESV

Again, Jesus warns that we are to be prepared to drop the “business” of daily living; to be prepared for the Return of Christ. There is a cost involved in being a “Christian” or a “Christ Follower.” We are not to be like those who are walking around with our heads in the clouds, or worse, with our heads filled with apathy or gloom. We are to be salt and light in this dark world. We should be praying for boldness and wisdom to seek out opportunities to serve, to encourage, and to share the Gospel.

“Lord, take over my days and my prayers, that I would not settle for comfort, but seek you with a fervent heart, and seek not to just observe, but to serve!”

October 23, 2023 0

Over There…

Over there, over there,
Send the word, send the word over there,
That the Yanks are coming, the Yanks are coming,
The drums rum-tumming everywhere.
So prepare, say a prayer,
Send the word, send the word to beware,
We’ll be over, we’re coming over,
And we won’t come back till it’s over over there.
“Over There” by George M. Cohan, 1917

In 1917, as war was raging in Europe, songwriter George M. Cohan wrote a song urging young men in America to take up arms and fight in a war that seemed remote and unconnected with American interests (at that time). Americans were reading about the atrocities and massive numbers of dead and dying in the fields and trenches of France, Germany, Belgium, and Russia (among other places), and they were moved to do something bold and dramatic. Little could they imagine the true horror that awaited them in the mud- and blood-covered lands across the sea. Driven by emotion, rage, and a certain optimism that came from being an emerging “world power,” the “Yanks” swept into Europe, and they fought and died to bring an end to “the war to end all wars.”

Of course, they didn’t abolish war– less than a generation later, Europe and Asia were engulfed in World War II. Wars have been almost constant– somewhere in the world– throughout history. Violence, vengeance, terror, torture, oppression and lawlessness well up and spill over all the time. Just over the past weekend, terrorists carried out vicious attacks on Israel, and Israel has responded with vicious retaliation.

The soldiers who went “over there” in WWI and WWII were no safer or braver or smarter than the many thousands who had already died. They arrived, and they were forced to march through mud, suffer through trench warfare, breathe in deadly mustard gas, and risk dying in order to bring peace–just like their European counterparts. Many of them died within days, never knowing the outcome of their sacrifice. And many of them were too young to remember first-hand stories of our own horrible Civil War and the devastation in our own land, or the full-scale destruction of the Napoleonic, Germanic, and Crimean wars of the nineteenth century.

I have seen memes and posts, sent from Americans, asking for prayers for Israel, prayers for Gaza, prayers for Palestine, and prayers for peace in the Middle East. We are moved and horrified by what we see and hear on TV or over the internet. Some of us are moved to pray; some are moved to seek governmental or even military intervention. And this is natural– we can only imagine what horrors have already taken place, and what others await as the violence continues to escalate.

But, in another sense, it is all happening– “Over There.” We see footage of atrocities– families being ripped apart or slaughtered in front of cameras– many recorded precisely to amplify the terror of their actions. But we sit in comfort and safety. We imagine that such viciousness would not happen in our own neighborhood; would not affect our own families–not that it NEVER could; but that it would not– not here; only “over there.” The Middle East, or central Africa, or Eastern Europe.

Among American Christians, there is a dangerous mindset that such atrocities might not happen here because we are a “Christian” nation, or just because of our geographical distance from some of the current “hot spots.” But God has no sacred contract with the United States. There is nothing sacred about the North American continent that God will not allow terror to overwhelm us (We should know this from 9/11)! He does not “owe” us His sovereign protection; we do not “deserve” a pass on hard times, violent conflict, or upheaval. And we must resist the urge to “explain” away such horror. “Oh, they’ve always had conflict in the Middle East.” “Well, if ________(event) hadn’t happened, this wouldn’t have been necessary.” There were many here in America who tried to rationalize the wars of the 20th century by referring to colonialism and reparations– as though war and violence, genocide and massive destruction are rational acts.

We SHOULD be praying for the region of Israel and Gaza– as well as the conflicts going on elsewhere around the world. We should speak out against the horrors and atrocities of terrorism and war– wherever we find them. But we must do so with the humility and humanity that recognizes the following:

God is still sovereign– these attacks and retaliations have not taken God by surprise. The chaos and bloodshed break His heart– but they do not change His plans, or alter His Holiness, or nullify His mercy. We can pray with hope and confidence in His timing and judgment, but we cannot pray in our own “righteous” opinions or knowledge. He is God– We are NOT.
God sends rain and sunshine on both the “righteous” and the “wicked.” We can take sides in any conflict, but we cannot know God’s full plan or His purposes in letting conflict arise, or letting it continue. Our prayers should reflect that, even as we pray for peace.
God’s message to us is the same as always– Trust Him and Obey His Word. Go, and preach the Gospel; make disciples, and BE disciples. Whether we are called to fight, to provide help and support, or even to wait in silence, we need to seek God’s wisdom, not our own.
God Loves Israel with an everlasting covenant–that does not mean that God does not love other nations and peoples, but it should cause us to remember that His covenant is with the descendants of Abraham and Isaac– not because they are holier or more worthy of His love, but because God chose them to be an example of His Mercy and His Wrath.
God is omnipresent– He is WITH all those who are suffering during this time. He is not willing that any should perish, not willing that any should succumb to hatred and destruction. Yet He is willing to allow for free will and giving people a chance to repent and turn from the path of violence and death. And, if such horrors rise up “over here,” God will still be the same God, the same all-knowing, all-seeing, all-powerful, and all-gracious God He is now, and always has been.

October 13, 2023 0

Guard Your Heart

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Proverbs 4:23 NIV https://www.biblestudytools.com/proverbs/4-23.html

The world has a lot to say about hearts. We can be heartsick, heartbroken, half-hearted, all heart, hard-hearted, tender-hearted; we can lead with our heart or follow our heart, wear our heart on our sleeve, or have a change of heart. We can have a heart of gold, or a heart of stone. Our heart can be in the right place, or it can wander.

The Bible has a lot to say about our hearts as well. In Proverbs, we are told to guard our hearts above all else.

Our hearts are precious, but they are also fragile and fickle. Our hearts can be led astray, bruised, crushed, and hardened by sin– not just our own sin, but sins that are committed against us. And hardened hearts are not immune to damage– they don’t become stronger, just more rigid and brittle. We live in a world of damaged hearts. And damaged hearts are prone to damage other hearts.

God does not want us to lock up our hearts or wrap them in barbed wire, but He does want us to be watchful and active in protecting our hearts from the enemy. God created us with emotions, but not every emotion should be indulged or shared with others. We are told to rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn. But we are never told to encourage jealousy, anger, depression, envy, apathy, rage, boastfulness, or hatred. Letting these emotions control our actions can only lead to further pain, destruction, sorrow, and heartache.

We need to guard our hearts, not only from external threats, but from internal deception. We think we know our own hearts– we tend to trust them more than we trust God, or His Word, or the godly advice of friends or family. We act at the prompting of our emotions– sometimes in direct conflict with God’s Word and Wisdom, and to our shame and pain.

When we pray, God’s spirit can heal our heartache, and give us the strength of heart to reach out and heal others. But we must be careful not to attempt healing others in our own power and wisdom. Our heart may seem to be “in the right place,” but often, that’s how we got hurt in the first place!

Tender hearts, broken hearts, even hard hearts– God can heal them all and use them to heal others. That’s because God’s heart is perfect–and on Calvary, He poured it out to rescue you, redeem you, and restore you. In return, you can safely and confidently pour out your heart before God. He is your loving Father. He created your heart, and He can be trusted to protect it.

September 13, 2023 0

A Prayer For Fathers

We are approaching Father’s Day. It is a day of celebration for many people, but it can also be a day of sadness for others. This year will be a milestone for our family, as my father passed away 25 years ago; and yet–we are preparing to celebrate the birth of my grand-nephew’s first child. This will make him a father, my nephew will become a grandfather, and my brother will become a great-grandfather! My husband is a father and grandfather, and so are three of his brothers. We also have brothers, brothers-in-law, nephews and cousins who are great dads. So we really have a lot to celebrate!

Fatherhood– the kind we celebrate– is more than just contributing genetic material to a new life, or claiming a child on an income tax statement, or showing up once in awhile for major events. Fatherhood involves sacrifice. It requires wisdom and patience. It involves ongoing commitments, and the tough love that says, “No” because it’s the right thing, rather than the easy thing to say. Fatherhood requires a man to be a teacher, provider, protector, defender, coach, and disciplinarian. It also requires humility, and grace, encouragement and sometimes tears. In addition, fatherhood requires prayer. No father is perfect, and no father can do all that he needs to in his own power. Fathers need our support and encouragement, our grace, and our prayers.

It is tempting to label our fathers. I have known “good” fathers. And I have known fathers who have abandoned or even abused their responsibilities, causing trauma, anguish, and hurt to their families, lasting for generations. My own father wasn’t perfect, but he was a “good” father. He was a man of humor and integrity, faithful, honest, loving and humble; a man of faith, and a man of honor. My father-in-law was the same. They left wonderful legacies of wisdom, hard work, and quiet strength. But I know of other fathers who have ruined the lives of their children (as well as their own lives) through fear, selfishness, addictions, abuse, anger, greed, and pride. Father’s Day can cause regret, envy, and bitterness in the hearts of many fathers and children alike. Many people would like to forget about their fathers on Father’s Day. Some don’t even know how to celebrate– they’ve never seen or heard from their father; some don’t even know his name!

But Father’s Day is not only for “good” fathers. It is a time to honor those who have been faithful, but it is also a time to reach out to those who need help. Good fathers are needed! And “bad” fathers need to be called out– not indulged or ignored, but held, guided, rehabilitated, or even incarcerated, for the good of their children. Hurting boys often grow up to be hurtful fathers. Hurting girls often end up in hurtful relationships. Hurtful fathers often struggle with their own baggage of hurt and disappointment from past generations, without knowing how to change. Fathers need more than a “day”, a cook-out, or another tie. They need a mission and a purpose; they need respect and forgiveness; they need encouragement and accountability.

My prayer today is that this Father’s Day can be a day of honor AND of healing for fathers and their children. I pray that struggling fathers will be encouraged and strengthened; that hard-working, faithful fathers will see the rewards of their efforts and find hope to keep going; that absent and apathetic fathers will wake up to the challenge and the gift of fatherhood; that broken fathers will find help and healing for themselves AND for their families; that hurting sons and daughters will find the grace to move beyond the pain of unmet expectations and abuse to become better men and women.

All that I pray for is made possible because we have a Heavenly Father– a perfect, loving, eternally wise Father– who loves us through our struggles and our pain. He knows our every need, sees our every tear, and hears our every prayer. He is ready to be our coach, our provider, our healer, our disciplinarian, and our protector. No matter our experiences or how we feel about our earthly fathers, or about being a father, we can trust Him to be all that we need. Our Heavenly Father will never abandon us, reject us, abuse us, or despise us. He will comfort, encourage, uplift, and guide us– now and forever. All we need to do is pray and accept Him for all that He is!

June 16, 2023 0

But Did I Pray?

I cried a bit.
I threw a fit.
Made a fuss;
Kicked up some dust…
But did I pray?

I made a plan.
I took a stand.
I marched around;
Made some sound.
But did I pray?

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

I went on-line;
Looked for a sign.
I read a book;
Took another look.
But did I pray?

I hit a wall.
I made some calls.
I spoke to friends.
I followed trends.
But did I pray?

I shook my head
And then I said
A hasty word.
I felt unheard.

I wondered why;
Had another cry.
I drove my car
And searched the stars.
But did I pray?

Prayers are simple.
Prayers are quiet.
I wanted answers.
I wanted a riot.

My heart was proud.
My voice was loud.

But what can I say?
I didn’t pray.

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2046&version=ESV

“Be still, and know that I am God..” Psalm 46:10

May 31, 2023 0

Debt Free!

7“Blessed are those

    whose transgressions are forgiven,

    whose sins are covered.

⁸Blessed is the one

    whose sin the Lord will never count against them.”
Romans 4:7-8 (NIV) via biblegateway.com (See also Psalm 32:1-2)

Ask me about my most embarrassing moment, or my greatest failure..better yet, ask one of my friends or relatives! We tend to hang on to our past, especially our mistakes, our hurts, our missed opportunities, and our shortcomings. When I taught public speaking in a local high school, I heard horror stories about why “I can’t get in front of people and talk.” The fear of public speaking rates higher in some studies than the fear of Death! And often, the fear is based on an incident from early childhood of people laughing at a small, but very public mistake. Such moments haunt us.

As we grow older, we let our regrets live large– those things we “would have, should have, could have” done, or the things we shouldn’t have said, but can never un-say. And even if we try to move on or forget the past, there always seems to be someone who cannot let go, cannot forgive, or cannot forgive. Lives have been stunted and ruined by the ghosts of “what happened” when…

Photo by Wildan Zainul Faki on Pexels.com

God is all-knowing. There is nothing we’ve ever done, said, or even thought, that He “missed,” ignored, or “lost track of.” God has total recall over all the centuries and eons of time– past, present, and even future! And yet, God offers to forgive ALL our sins, and to “remember them no more.” God will never bring up “that time when you disappointed me…” God will never look at you with condemnation over anything you have confessed and repented over. It’s not that God will never be able to recall what happened; but He will no longer “charge it to your account.” He has chosen to pay the consequences in His own Blood, so that you can be debt free.

Imagine if you had no bills. If all your mortgages, utility payments, credit card debt, medical bills–everything that you were responsible to pay– all were stamped “Paid in full.” You never had to worry about interest payments, late fees, repossession, evening phone calls from bill collectors, credit scores, etc. What a weight off your shoulders! Imagine if you had no reason to fear getting in front of a room full of people to speak or sing or give a presentation– no fear that others would judge your every hesitation, or whether your tie was straight, or your hair was mussed, or you stumbled over a word or phrase or tripped on the steps leading up to the podium. Imagine being accepted and embraced by the very one who, by rights, should be your most severe critic.

Sometimes, when we see God as our critic, our judge, or our opponent, we’re not seeing God as He really is– we’re seeing a reflection of ourselves– harsh, judgmental, unwilling to forgive others; unwilling to forgive ourselves. The very first deception of the Enemy was to distort God’s image from Creator and Sustainer to Judge and Tyrant. Yet Satan is called “The Accuser,” not God. God’s Holy Spirit may convict us of Sin– causing us to see that we have done wrong– but His purpose is always to correct and restore us, not to haunt and condemn us. Even the “worst” sins are not beyond God’s ability or willingness to forgive. Jesus forgave His accusers, His betrayers, and His executioners from the Cross!

Forgiveness is not easy. Sin is real; it has real and terrible consequences. Sin hurts, humiliates, victimizes, and traumatizes. And its effects do not simply vanish if we say, “I forgive.” But hanging on to the pain and anger keeps us from finding and experiencing the healing and wholeness that Jesus offers. Forgiveness does not mean that the sin, or the pain, never happened– God will not “forget” injustice just because we forgive the unjust. Forgiveness means that we no longer need to try to collect the debt from someone else– because God has already promised to pay it back with interest! And forgiving yourself doesn’t mean that your past actions didn’t happen or didn’t cause pain. In fact, whenever there are opportunities to atone for past actions, or ask forgiveness from those we have wronged, we should take them. But where such opportunities are impossible for us, even when we cannot see how such pain could be redeemed or relationships restored, God has promised that we can move beyond our past mistakes and live a new , blessed, and debt-free life.

When we approach God in prayer, we come as we are– people with past mistakes, very human emotions, including doubt and fear, and unworthy to stand on our own before a perfect God. But it is God who invites us to come to Him– debt free and embraced by His limitless Grace!

April 21, 2023 0

Life is Pain…

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+16%3A33&version=NLT

One of my favorite movies is “The Princess Bride.” The title character begins the story as a young, beautiful, wealthy, and spoiled young woman. She falls in love with the young farm boy who works for her father. The young man leaves to make his fortune, but word comes that he has been captured and killed by pirates. In utter despair, the young woman allows herself to become engaged to a spoiled and wicked prince. She has allowed her grief to consume her, and she cares nothing for the prince, his wealth or power, or even her own future. Before she can be married to the prince, she is kidnapped by villains, and “rescued” by a mysterious pirate. Instead of being grateful, she curses the pirate, telling him that he could never understand her great loss and pain. His answer, harsh, glib, but to the point, is to say that “life is pain, Princess. Anyone who tells you differently is selling something.”

There are certain truths in life that we would avoid if we could– death, pain, sorrow, grief, suffering, and Sin–we don’t want to hear the harsh reality of our situation. We don’t want to suffer or hurt at all; much less to discover that our suffering is commonplace or universal. Everyone will taste death; everyone will face pain and grief and suffering in this life. Everyone will suffer as a result of Sin– our individual actions have consequences, as do the cumulative actions of our culture, our ancestors, and the entire human race. Life isn’t always good, or fair, or just, or comfortable. This is a harsh truth, but it IS the truth. We will face injustice– no matter who we are. We will face suffering, illness, and death. We will face loss–loss of a loved one, loss of a job, loss of a marriage, loss of health, loss of freedom or autonomy. We will not always win. We will not always get what we want. We will not always get justice in this life.

There are four common techniques we tend to use to avoid facing harsh truths– denial or avoidance, anger, bargaining, and depression or despair. Many people know these terms from the Kubler-Ross studies on patients with terminal illnesses and the five “stages” she identified as they came to terms with their impending death. https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/ The fifth “stage” was acceptance. The five stages have been applied commonly to other forms of grieving and loss, including the loss of a loved one or the break-up of a marriage. While most of us go through some or all of these stages when we face suffering, we don’t all go through them the same way or even in the same order.

Many of us live in avoidance and denial– rushing headlong into meaningless pleasure, self-medicating with alcohol or drugs, staying busy with the pursuit of wealth or power, moving from place to place or relationship to relationship. Others wrap themselves in anger– blaming everyone else for their pain, seeking revenge, driving away those who want to help. Anger may feel productive, but it limits our scope of vision and keeps us focused on the pain inside. Still others try to bargain. Some seek to avoid aging, diminished health, or death by trying every new diet or fitness routine. Others try to avoid guilt, pain, or disappointment by trying to be righteous enough to earn a supernatural blessing or “good karma.” Still many others wallow in depression and despair, lost in the swamp and mist, sinking into a pit of their own feelings. Like those who live in denial, they avoid the difficult choices that would lead to life, instead letting life wash over them and draining them of energy and joy.

These reactions are normal and human. Harsh truths hurt– they shock us, overwhelm us, shatter our trust, even shake our faith. But they ARE true. We cannot change our circumstances by running away, raging at everyone around us, or giving up. We cannot go back in time and “undo” the tragic circumstances of our lives. And our reactions have their own consequences. They cannot negate the past or change the present. They can only impact the future.

But there is another truth: God has not left us without resources, even for the harshest realities we face. Even when we are in despair, or angry, or in denial, God can give us peace and strength to go on. God isn’t “selling something” to make the pain go away or make our life “trouble-proof.” Jesus never offered a comfortable life to His followers. In fact, He promised that our lives would be filled with trouble and pain and sorrow! Christians who claim that they never face fear, or failure, fury or frustration, loss and sorrow– they are “selling” a false gospel. The Good News isn’t about avoiding pain or sorrow. It is about OVERCOMING them! Jesus faced and conquered death on a cross! He could have avoided it– He could have been angry at those who betrayed Him–He could have stayed buried in despair and failure. But He arose! We don’t worship someone who has never wept, or faced betrayal or loss. Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6)– if anyone knows the harsh truth, it is the one who IS Truth! And this Truth hurts– He hurts to see us grieving; He hurts when we reject Him to go our own way; He hurts even as He allows us to hurt. And He offers us His Grace to survive and thrive– not an escape, but a victory!

Faith, prayer, worship, promises– these are not God’s way of helping us escape the reality of harsh truths. They are His tools for helping us to overcome and be victorious in the face of trials and setbacks, grief and pain, even death! A life of faith isn’t a life of denying the harsh realities of life, nor is it a prescription for avoiding life’s hurts. Even the faithful will someday have to taste death. Even those who pray and praise will often do so in tears of anguish and even momentary doubt. But they will reach the peace of acceptance as they wrestle with the seasons of pain, knowing that God promises healing and joy and justice– in His perfect will and timing! As Princess Buttercup discovers in “The Princess Bride”– “Death cannot stop true love!” And it cannot stop the Truth that IS Love!

“Life is pain…” In THIS fallen and broken world. But we can take heart–Jesus has overcome this world. He has won victory over sin and death, pain and loss. And He gives abundant life. Life that transcends disease, disappointment, and even death.

April 3, 2023 0

Justice? Or Vengeance?

When violence strikes, I want justice. I want action. I want to make the evil stop.

Just the other day, there was another school shooting in the news. At least six innocent people lost their lives, and another community was ripped apart by grief, shock, and anger.

But is it really justice that I am seeking? Or is it vengeance?

Justice is permanent. Justice is final. Justice takes time. Vengeance is visceral and immediate. Vengeance is a reaction; a retaliation. Justice, on the other hand, is blind to the emotions of the initial event. Vengeance is driven by emotion. Justice comes through the objective application of the law.

Justice is God’s business. I do NOT understand why or how God allows evil to happen in the first place. It hurts. It doesn’t make sense. It is destructive. But it is the nature of Sin. And Sin infects the entire world. We cannot escape from it. We cannot deny its existence. We cannot put an end to it. We can only follow the arduous and imperfect justice systems that are in place for our community or our country. We cannot achieve perfect justice. But God can. And He has promised to do so– in His time, and in His way. This can be comforting, but it can also be frustrating.

Vengeance is also God’s business. God has emotions, just like we do. But His are always under perfect control. God’s wrath is frightening in its power, and paralyzing in its purpose.

Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”
Romans 12:19 (ESV)

As imperfect as our systems of justice may be, they are still systems, with order and time to look at the total situation. Vengeance doesn’t stop to count the cost. It doesn’t stop to listen to the full story. It seethes and coils like a rattlesnake, waiting to inject venom into the first victim to cross its path. Human vengeance never leads to peace.

Also, vengeance is limited to the strength and resources of the avenger. If a shooter takes the life of my loved one, my vengeance is limited to the actions I can take. I may kill the shooter; I may take the life of their family members; but I cannot bring my loved one back, nor can I guarantee that the killer will suffer the same amount or the same way I do. Vengeance never looks forward, and it never offers a solution to move forward. It lives in bitterness and anger and discontent.

As followers of Christ, we are asked to take a stance that seems impossible from a human standpoint. We are asked to keep our hands clean, to keep our minds at peace, and to give our grief, our anger, and our craving for vengeance over to God with no reservation and no option to set the limits or timelines.

To the world around us, this seems weak and even unjust. What if the evildoer “gets away” with her/his crime? What if the victim never gets “justice” in their (or our) lifetime? What if we never “see” justice done? What if God “fails” to avenge us or our loved one? What does the Christian “do” in the face of evil? Nothing?! Fall on our knees and pray?! Offer lukewarm assurances and empty promises?

The problem with evil– especially shocking violent events– is that we can’t see beyond the immediate shock and pain. That doesn’t mean that there IS no pain or shock or anger or frustration if we choose not to react with vengeance. The pain is still very real, and overwhelming. But we choose to make room for faith that sees the larger picture. Faith makes room to see not just justice, but mercy. It allows us to see the overall tragedy of Sin, beyond our immediate tragedy of an individual act. Faith sees beyond our helplessness to God’s Sovereignty. It sees beyond the present pain to future healing.

I pray for the families of the victims in this latest shooting– and for all those who have experienced such violence. And I pray that God will show me what I can do to make a positive difference going forward. I pray for the strength and the faith to let go of hatred, bitterness, malice, and outrage. Finally, I praise God, even in the middle of pain and shock, knowing that He can be trusted to bring perfect Justice– and perfect vengeance–the kind that leads to a peace beyond our understanding. These are not “easy” prayers. They are not blind prayers, or prayers prayed without tears and groaning and questions. But they are real prayers, not empty wishes that I could avoid all unpleasantness or that I could exempt myself (or others) from tasting sorrow, grief or pain. Rather they are prayers that acknowledge that Life is more than struggle; that Love and Mercy are stronger than despair, and God has already won the ultimate victory.

March 29, 2023 0

Tag: anger