Why Do I Pray?

I pray every day. But why? There are short, glib answers– “Prayer works,” or “The Bible tells me to.” Or I could say that it’s just a “good” habit, or that it “does something” for me. But prayer is more complex than that. I can give a lot of generic reasons for someone to pray. I can list (and have listed) many benefits of regular prayer. But what are my personal reasons for praying?

Prayer does “do something” for me– lots of somethings. Not every time; not always in the same measure, but prayer can:

  • Put me in a better mindset; it changes my focus and my attitude. When I pray, the world around me shrinks, along with all the worries and distractions it presents. Instead, I begin to focus on “God” things– the metaphysical reality that I am not the center of the universe, and my limited understanding is not enough to navigate life in its fullest sense. Jesus offers “abundant life” (See John 10:10)– life to the full. And prayer ignites that, taps into that, and lifts me from futility and confusion to meet with One who sees the end from the beginning.

  • “Recharge my batteries.” Prayer, meditation, “quiet time”– they are all similar, and they all have a physical benefit. Spending time in prayer can lower blood pressure, promote clearer thinking, and increase a person’s ability to withstand stress. Prayer can improve mood, but it can also improve the body’s ability to fight off depression, infection, and other stress-related issues. This is very personal for me, because I have struggled with stress and depression at various times in my life, and prayer can calm me, help me to change negative thought patterns, and endure hardship better than anything else. (Please note this does not mean that I don’t also need to do other things– proper diet, plenty of sleep, hydration are all necessary. Some people may require medication– prayer is not a substitute for good health advice, rather it is an integral part of being physically and spiritually healthy.)
  • Deepen my faith. God doesn’t always give immediate and clear answers to my prayers. In fact, it may feel sometimes as though He has forgotten me. So why continue to pray? Because God DOES answer prayer. Often, He answers in surprising and unexpected ways. Sometimes His answers come so slowly, so subtly, that I might miss them– if I weren’t keeping track. This is one of the great benefits of keeping a prayer journal or diary…I will often see an old entry, one that I had given up on or forgotten, and realize that God answered it weeks ago without any startling revelation or dramatic rescue. If I only pray when I expect God to do the impossible immediately, I may miss the development of something even more amazing that I imagined!

  • Become a vital part of my discipleship. Being a disciple literally involves discipline…I can’t say that I follow Christ part-time. Ignoring daily habits, like prayer and Bible study; failing to make time for fellowship with others; depending on my feelings instead of God’s Truth to guide my life– is hypocritical. Also, prayer should open my heart and mind to others who need to BE discipled. And this leads me to another benefit…Prayer can
  • Help me develop empathy for others. As I pray for others, I learn more about the struggles they face; I learn about their deeper needs. For instance, I may begin praying for someone with a chronic illness to be healed. And that is good. But as I pray for them daily, I learn that along with healing, they desire help with everyday chores that they can no longer do, or they need support and encouragement. Maybe they need rides to doctor appointments and tests. If I am praying for someone struggling with past mistakes or addictions, I learn to see with eyes of compassion and encouragement, rather than judgment and self-righteousness. It’s not just about praying for the “big” needs but learning to pray for (and find ways to help with!) intermediate needs as well. Finally, prayer can…
  • Remind me that I am never alone! I don’t pray to a brick wall, nor do I pray in a vacuum. I LOVE meeting with our local prayer group every week. I love hearing the others pray. I love being reminded that God listens to my prayers– The Father listens; The Son is my intercessor; The Spirit translates even my groans and mumbles–God delights in hearing from me! (See Zechariah 3:17; Hebrews 13:5; others)

So, Yes, I would say that “Prayer works.” But not in the sense that I can show that God has answered my requests exactly how or when I wanted. There are prayers I have prayed for most of my life that have not been answered “my way” yet. Reckoning with hurtful words and deeds from my past; family members who still haven’t accepted Christ; friends who are still facing the consequences of sinful life choices; situations and circumstances that I would like to see changed. And I don’t have any jaw-dropping evidence that my prayers can cure cancer or end world hunger or make my life problem-free. Quite the opposite. But I DO have evidence that Prayer has made a difference in my life; that I HAVE seen lives changed in ways that are impossible to explain away; that prayer is worth pursuing.

And that is why I pray.

“How Are You Today?”

I got a scam phone call the other day. The lady on the other end started the conversation by saying something like, “Hello. My name is Jane, and I’m calling from the Business Lending Department. How are you today?” Her voice was pleasant, and her question innocuous, yet my “radar” went off, and I hung up the phone, rather than answering her question.

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Why?

Three things:

  1. I answered the phone by saying, “Hello” and the name of my little shop. It’s a business phone number, and I get many calls from customers, and from salespeople as well. Usually, as soon as I say my greeting, they jump right in with their request, or their name and request, i.e. “This is Sharon. I was in the other day, and I was wondering about…” or “This is Matt from (Name of my insurance agency), and I need to speak with you about a change in your coverage.” A business person may occasionally say something like, “I hope you’re doing well today.” or “Is this a good time to talk?” A friendly customer or a friend will often ask, “How are you?” or “How are things going?” But this was different. There was a long pause, which seemed odd, as though the call might be from far away. The phone number that came up on caller ID was not from a local area code and didn’t include a state listing or a company name (Pennsylvania or Wyoming, State Farm, or Citibank, etc.) This can happen with cell phone calls, but it can also be an indication that the call is coming from a hidden number. “Jane,” while she sounded pleasant, also sounded like she was reading from a script. “My name is Jane” indicated that she was not someone I would have met before, and “How are you today?” sounds like the opening line from a stranger’s sales pitch.
  2. I have read articles about scam calls. One of the first things they do is ask an innocuous question like, “Can you hear me, ok?” It seems like a simple, silly, harmless question, but if they ask you a Yes/No question, and you say “Yes,” they can record your answer and use it to “prove” that you agreed to a product or program by phone– even if you didn’t. “How are you today?” isn’t a Yes/No question, but it is the kind of question most people will answer without thinking, and it naturally leads to other seemingly innocuous questions, like “Can you hear me?” Call me hyper-cynical or super-suspicious, but these questions seem– from a complete stranger– like “set ups” to me after reading about how they are sometimes used.
  3. “Jane” is such a common and unassuming name. I have friends named Jane. One of my favorite novels is “Jane Eyre.” I love reading books about Miss Jane Marple, the unassuming, crime solving spinster of the equally unassuming village of St. Mary Mead. She was just “Jane.” Not Jane Torquist, or Jane Sullivan, or Jane Suzuki. And “just Jane” was calling from “the Business Lending Department.” Not the business lending department of a particular bank or business group. Not Wells Fargo, or Chase, or even a local banking chain. Not Visa or American Express. Just “the Business Lending Department.” Again, call me paranoid, but that set all my alarm bells ringing.
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Now– what does any of this have to do with prayer? Bear with me, as I tell the “rest of the story.”

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After I hung up, I felt bad. Hanging up–even when I suspected the call was far from innocent–seems very rude. “Jane” had been very pleasant. It felt churlish and even cowardly to hang up on her. I started stewing. I don’t like to think of myself as rude, churlish, or cowardly. After all, what would Jesus do, right? So I prayed for forgiveness, even though I wasn’t sure precisely what I had done wrong.

And God answered my prayer immediately. “Jane.” The woman had given her name as “Jane.” I have a friend named Jane who is going through a tough time right now. I have been praying for her for weeks. Had I prayed for her today? Not yet! God had sent me a reminder of my friend Jane via a scam call! Aren’t God’s ways mysterious and magnificent?! He also gave me a great idea to help me be at peace about the phone call. I thought, “if “Jane” ever calls back, I’m not going to answer her question, and play a passive role in the conversation. I will simply ask her what company she works for, and how SHE is today!”

And guess what! About an hour later, “Jane” called back. The call started exactly like the earlier call. The script was exactly the same– the same pause, the same wording. So when she asked, “How are you today?” I simply asked her, “which company do you work for? You said you are calling from the Business Lending Department, but which one?” And this time, SHE hung up! I had been right to be suspicious– right to stand my ground and not get involved in a scam– on any level.

Such a simple encounter, but so many lessons to be learned:

  • God answers “little” prayers; “awkward” prayers; He answers earnest and simple prayers when we just don’t even know what to pray or why. Things that seem silly (like whether or not I seemed rude or cowardly to a scam artist!) are never too silly or unimportant to take to the very Throne of Grace.
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  • God uses simple things to call our attention to bigger things. This woman could have chosen any name, but she said her name was Jane, and I believe that was God-ordained, to remind me to lift up my dear friend– to move my mind from something silly, like a phone scam, to something infinitely more important, like thanking God for Jane’s friendship over the years, and sharing in her immediate concerns.
  • God teaches us to recognize authenticity– and insincerity–as we follow Him. My “alarm bells” went off almost immediately when I answered this phone call. Why? Even though “Jane” was pleasant, she didn’t seem authentic. She used words and phrases that seemed friendly and harmless on the surface, but the delivery just seemed “off.” The same thing can happen when I read an on-line article, or listen to an advertisement, or even get involved in conversations. God sends us a spirit of Discernment that is sharper than just “being savvy.” But it comes from Him– not our own intelligence or listening to “smart people.” I know this because I know people who are acknowledged as “intelligent” who fall for amazingly stupid schemes and make appallingly bad life choices, while others who are called “simple” avoid such things without even being able to explain how. It reminds me of a story about a famous pianist practicing a complicated piece. She was playing along and suddenly stopped, saying she had missed a single note. “How can you tell?,” asked her friend who was standing nearby. “Your fingers are flying over the keys. How can you tell that you missed anything. The piece sounded fine to me.” “But I practice hours each day. I’ve heard myself play this piece hundreds of times correctly. I know what it SHOULD sound like. And this time, I missed a note.” When we practice listening to God’s voice– whether in the Bible, or in our conscience, or in the advice of others, we learn to hear “what it SHOULD sound like!”
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  • God teaches us wisdom, and gives us “second chances” to put it into practice. Jesus faced malicious Pharisees who tried to trick Him with seemingly innocuous questions. They came to Him with polite but false flattery, and tried to catch Him “off guard.” Jesus generally responded by asking them simple questions in return– questions that often exposed their real motives. He didn’t lose His temper; He didn’t passively fall into their traps. He didn’t walk away without an answer, either.
  • God can use “bad” experiences to teach us good things. He is teaching me to recognize a “scam” when I start to hear it. But (hopefully) He is also teaching me to speak and act more authentically myself! How often do I ask someone “How are you today?” not because I actually want to hear the answer, but because it is the “polite” thing to do? How often do I ask seemingly harmless questions without thinking? My words can bring healing– or suspicion, harm, or confusion. Jesus asked some probing questions, but always with the intent of helping others see the truth.

Lord, I am so thankful for the lessons you give us– even in the simplest situations in the midst of our busy lives. Help me to listen for your voice– even when “Jane” is on the line. What an amazing and wise God you are!

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