Tag: burdens

The Weight of Prayer

Have you ever carried a burden that just got heavier each minute? Some pressing need, or a load of guilt and shame, or an unresolved issue that has been hanging over you for years with no relief. Sometimes, prayer is very heavy. It is a sacrifice, and a burden to keep praying for an unsaved loved one, or to fully confess the shame you have carried for years. Your needs (or the needs of loved ones) can push down on your spirit and make it difficult to even want to pray. Pain, grief, or persecution can cause you to shrivel up inside and even though you want to pray, you just can’t seem to find the words.

But oh! The relief of carrying our burdens to the throne of Grace! God may not give us immediate relief from the burdens of pain and suffering, but He will come alongside and shoulder a God-sized portion of our load. He has promised this. Jesus Himself said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30 NIV)

Not only will God come alongside us as a result of prayer, His Spirit will help us in our weakness and inability to express our deepest emotions. “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.” (Romans 8: 26-7 ESV)

I have found this to be true through experience. And I have also found great relief when I can share my burdens with other Christians and know that they are praying for me and for my loved ones. One of the greatest burdens we can bear is that of isolation and hopelessness. Finding a trusted group of fellow believers can ease the pain of bearing such burdens alone. Often, Christian friends can offer limited practical help for immediate needs or provide counseling and wisdom in our next steps. Two words of warning– no group of friends, even Christian friends, can substitute for God. Friendship should not substitute for prayer and Godly wisdom. And true friends will always point you to God rather than trying to fix everything in their own power and time frame. A true friend will not only share the “weight” of your burden, but also the “wait” for God’s answer! Secondly, “sharing” is not the same as rehearsing the same guilty secrets over and over for attention, shock value, or entertainment. It is not gossiping about the same horrible boss or nosy neighbor you can’t seem to forgive or lamenting over all the things you might have done differently as a parent (or spouse or co-worker) last week.

Prayer is deep. It is heavy. And it is powerful. But it can also be freeing, removing the burden of worry, shame, guilt, and isolation. We may enter prayer with groaning and exit with praise! God inhabits our prayers! He is with us in the groaning and in the struggle. He sends us friends and “angels unaware.” And He remains with us in victorious celebration. He provides comfort, strength, and peace as we lay our burdens down. He provides companionship, help, and hope as He shares the weight of whatever we bring to Him.

Don’t “wait” to share your burdens. Let God do the heavy lifting!

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Journaling Prayer

Full disclosure– I’m not any type of expert on either prayer or journal writing.  But I do keep a prayer log of sorts, and I want to share how that works for me, and why I think it is helpful.

My prayer “journal” is actually a set of four standard notebooks I picked up on sale about two and a half years ago at an office supply store.  Each notebook has 100 pages.  I have labeled each page with a day (February 12, for example) at the top– three months to each notebook.  Below the date, I list people I know who are celebrating birthdays or anniversaries that day, as well as people who died on that day.  Below that, I save space for urgent prayer requests as I become aware of them.  To the side, I list a place (a country, city, or community) to pray for that day.  In the front cover or each notebook, I have a list of focus areas to pray for each day of the week, as well– things like family, leaders and authority figures, cultural issues, missions, etc.  The back side of each page is left to record answers, results, and updates.

The journal/notebook approach is not meant to lock my prayer life into a fixed routine; it is not a checklist of what I must pray for each day (and nothing else or added to everything else).  I don’t take the notebook with me everywhere– instead, I have a small notepad in my purse to jot down thoughts or requests. Sometimes, I record these in the larger notebook later, but not always.  I review the journal once a day, but I pray throughout the day– sometimes raising the names and places in the journal, other times people or situations as they come to my heart or mind.  The point is not to make an unnecessary burden of prayer.  The point is to remind me that prayer is a pursuit–an ongoing discipline as well as an intimate pouring out of my heart to God.

I’ve come to delight in turning the pages to see:

  • who is having a birthday/anniversary today– who might be encouraged with a FB post, a call or card or e-mail message
  • where in the world can I lift up people I may or may not know?  There are enough days in the year to pray for every country in the world, every U.S. state, and several major world cities or local communities–and while my list is in alphabetical order, I could have organized by geographic location, or simply listed random places for each day.  Some days, the places are familiar; other days I am inspired to look up information on places like Burkina Faso or find out more about West Virginia…
  • what was I praying about a year ago? Often, I find that my prayers have fallen into a particular pattern– and maybe I need to redirect my focus. Have I been mostly coming to God with burdens, or do my prayers reflect a heart of worship? Humility? Dependence on Him?
  • how faithful God has been over the years! Maybe there’s a burden that I’ve been praying about over many months or years, but far more often, I have forgotten the “urgent” need I was praying about just a few months ago–God answered in ways I did not anticipate. And those requests that are still “unanswered?” God HAS an answer. I just don’t know it yet.

 

Does the journal make me a better person or a better pray-er?  Well, prayer isn’t a competition, so while I would hope that it helps me develop perseverance, compassion, faithfulness, hope, trust, and wisdom in the practice and pursuit of prayer, it doesn’t make me or my prayer life “better” than someone else’s.  It is, however, a tool that is helping me chart the progress in this pursuit, and so I recommend it based on that experience.

If you feel (like I did for so many years) that your prayer life is haphazard and you want to grow in prayer, I encourage you to start with a simple journal– you don’t have to write out every thought or every request.  You don’t have to have a plan for every day.  But keep a remembrance of your prayer life –even a single item each day for a week, or a month–to look back on, and to move you forward.

For more detailed information, see my page about prayer journaling. Or do a search for “prayer journals.” You may find a system that works better for you– not because prayer needs to be systematic, but because prayer is a journey, and every journey can benefit from a journal!

 

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Prayer Requests

As someone who pursues prayer passionately, you might suspect that I hear a lot of prayer requests. And I do. And even so, it’s not enough. I always look for more! I admit to trolling on Facebook for prayer requests; following the church newsletter for prayer requests; and even asking friends if they have any requests when we chat. But what about prayer requests that aren’t exactly requests–

“Oh. It’s really nothing. I’m not worried about it or anything…”
“We’re just going through a rough patch. Nothing to be really concerned about…”
“It’s just something I have to deal with..”
“The doctor says it’s a chronic condition, so it’s just something I have to get used to…”
“I know so many other people who are hurting worse than we are…”

Sometimes, prayers are shortened or even missed because we are looking for prayer requests instead of prayer opportunities. Prayer is an opportunity to talk to God about anything that is on MY mind or in MY heart. Often, it comes in the wisp of a stray thought about someone else. Maybe I haven’t heard from them in weeks (or even years!), but suddenly, they are on my mind. Suddenly, I have an opportunity to pray for them. Do I know what is on their heart or mind? Probably not. But God knows! That schoolmate from fifth grade? Pray for them. So what if I only remember their first name– or their maiden name or their childhood nickname–God knows! That former co-worker who was having a rough time with her teenage son ten years ago? Ten years have passed! I know the son is now an adult. I don’t know if the relationship is better or worse now than it was a decade ago. I don’t even know for sure that the co-worker or her son are still alive. But God knows! My neighbor who seems to be doing fine, but I keep thinking about them, and I don’t know why– God knows! Each one is an opportunity to pray– nothing elaborate or specific– just to lovingly lift them up before God’s throne!

And what about the “actual” requests that I hear or see on-line? Sometimes, there are no details or specifics about “what” I am praying for. But it doesn’t matter. Because God already knows. Even more, He knows the end from the beginning, even if it isn’t exactly what is being requested. I can lift up in prayer situations about which I know very little– because God knows. And for those situations that seem dire or impossible– God knows those, too. And I can lift them up with confidence, even when I have no answers and the problems seem overwhelming.

This sounds easy, but it’s not. It forces me to step away from each request, each situation in which I might try to stake my own “claim.” Yes, I want my friend’s cancer to disappear, or my co-worker and her daughter to have a repaired and healthy relationship. But I don’t have the first clue how to make that happen. I don’t have any answers. I don’t know what GOD has planned in those situations. And while I know what sounds or feels good in the moment, I don’t know what is best in the grand scheme of things. But God knows! He doesn’t want me to solve each problem; He doesn’t need me to offer my “best” suggestion of how He should solve it. All He wants is for me to trust HIM to care for each need. In HIS way, in HIS time, and in the fulness of HIS love!

During Jesus’ ministry here on earth, He prayed many times, but His prayers rarely dwelt on details about specific situations. In fact, in teaching His disciples how to pray, He included the phrase, “THY kingdom come, THY Will be done in earth as it is in Heaven.” (Matthew 6:10) And that is a perfect phrase to exercise, whether I have a specific request, or a flash of memory, or a nagging worry about someone or something.

The same is true when it is my turn to request prayer. There are many times I find myself like the people I quoted above– trying to make light of a situation or avoid actually requesting prayer. It may sound humble and self-deprecating, but there is an element of arrogance in saying “I don’t need prayer for …”(whatever situation). We ALL need prayer. We ALL need to live in the assurance that we can “cast all our cares upon Him, for He cares for us” (1 Peter 5:7 paraphrased). And we need to acknowledge that we should share our cares with others as they share their cares with us. And that we need to allow for God to involve others in the way He cares for us. Asking for prayer is a way of allowing others to share our concerns– and share in our joy of receiving answers to prayer! Requesting others to pray for us is not a weakness. We are not being a burden on others when we allow them to pray for us.

That is not to say that I need to publish every problem and concern on Facebook or in the Church Newsletter! Nor should I try to dictate how or when or what others should pray for me. But it does mean that I must be open to sharing the very real struggles I have with trusted friends, especially if they ask how they can pray for me. Even the “chronic” ones; even the “silly” ones. Because I don’t know how God may use that opportunity in THEIR life; nor do I know how God may use their prayers to bless my life.

But GOD knows!

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Building Blocks of Healthy Prayer

When I was in elementary school, we learned about nutrition. Back then, we were taught that there were four basic food groups (nutrition education has gone through several “cycles” since then– food pyramid, healthy plate, “eating the rainbow”, etc.). Eating a healthy balance of foods is essential to good health. If I only eat meat, or only sweets, I will not be healthy. If I just eat whatever or whenever I feel like it, my body won’t get all the necessary nutrients to grow, fight off diseases, and stay strong.

Pursuing a healthy prayer life includes essential “building blocks” or nutrients, as well. Over the course of many years, I have seen various guidelines and acronyms to help include different building blocks in prayer. I want to share a couple of them again today. These guidelines are just that– guidelines. But they can help balance our prayer life, and help it grow.

The first acronym I learned, and the one I have used for decades, is ACTS. Here’s how it works:

  • Adoration/Acknowledgement– begin each prayer by acknowledging God’s Sovereignty, His Holiness, His Goodness, and other qualities worth worshipping. This helps put you in the right frame of mind when talking to God. I am not just talking to a neighbor or a “good buddy”– I am speaking with the One who holds all of Creation in His hands! And He WANTS a relationship with me! He is all-powerful: there is nothing I can ask that He cannot do! His is all-loving: there is nothing I can ask that He won’t filter through His loving wisdom and will. Even if I don’t know what to ask for; even if I ask for the “wrong” thing– God will only allow those things that He can use for good. God is beyond space and time: He knows all that has happened– all the triumphs and tragedies of my life so far, and all that is to come. He is LORD: He is in control– now and forevermore. Whatever seemingly impossible circumstances I face, they are nothing compared to the eternal, almighty plans of God.
  • Confession–This doesn’t mean an endless repetition of all my failures and sins from six months ago, or raking myself over the coals for not being “holy enough.” This is an honest assessment of who I am in relation to God. God is Holy and perfect. I am not. If I acknowledge God’s goodness, I must also acknowledge that I fall short. I don’t know everything. I don’t always act with the right motives. I NEED the Holy Spirit’s guidance, and I DEPEND on Christ’s finished work on Calvary for my Salvation. This should naturally lead to
  • Thanksgiving/Trust– I can trust God to save me, NOT because of who I am, but because of what He has done. I can see God’s hand working in and around and through me as I yield to His Spirit in me. I can recall, and acknowledge so many of the ways that God has blessed me and others around me. Once I have these building blocks in place, I can bring burdens to God through
  • Supplication– this is just a fancy term for asking God to work His will in specific areas– healing, guidance, encouragement, strength, understanding, submitting to His will, and following Him. I can ask for personal help, or lift up family members, neighbors, friends, and yes, even enemies! I can pray about situations great and small–from wars and famines to lost keys and short tempers.

I learned about ACTS when I was in college, and I have found it to be a great guideline. While I don’t use it for every prayer– sometimes an issue calls for immediate and direct supplication, for instance– I find that using this in daily prayer helps me grow in faith, patience, endurance, and hope. When I come to God in panic or stress, and I haven’t built up a healthy, consistent practice of prayer, my words can be anemic– lacking in faith and based on my fear or anger. I pray with my focus on problems, rather than on God’s power to overcome any circumstance. Using ACTS helps me remember that it is GOD who “acts,” and always for the best!

The second acronym I have used is PRAY. It is very similar to ACTS, but the end focus is slightly different:

  • Praise/Adoration– once again, it begins with praising the God who is worthy; the God who hears me, sees me, loves me, and knows what is best. I cannot live victoriously without remembering the source of hope and victory, and putting my heart in HIS hands.
  • Repentance– as with Confession above, this is not an act of groveling and rehearsing past shame. It is acknowledging anything that I might be holding on to that gets in the way of my worship of and submission to God’. E.M. Blaiklock, the Christian apologist from New Zealand once said: “God alone knows how to humble us without humiliating us and how to exalt us without flattering us.”  Repentance is not about humiliation or holding on to guilt, but rather about staying humble and honest about our need for God’s Grace and Power. And turning from anything that might get in the way of following Jesus Christ.
  • Ask– once we have a right view of who God is, and who we are, we are free to ask Him whatever is on our mind, and share our questions, fears, burdens, etc., with the One who has all the answers!
  • Yield/ “Yes, LORD!”– The final step is making sure we are ready to listen and respond to God as we expect His answer. No matter what God’s answer may be, we should trust and obey His wisdom above our own.

I have come to value PRAY as a wonderful tool to help in my pursuit of prayer, and in my broader pursuit of Christlikeness. Both ACTS and PRAY help me pray “better.” It’s not that God grades my prayers or listens more or responds differently: but it helps me to better appreciate the power of prayer, and the power behind prayer. Individual prayers can change circumstances, but the pursuit of prayer is meant to change US as well. Prayer that shapes us, helps us grow– if that isn’t at least part of our pursuit of prayer, we are missing out on what God wants to do through us, and not just for us.

It is important, just as with nutrition, that we have a healthy balance in our prayer life. That balance consists of worship, repentance, sharing our burdens, showing gratitude, and offering ourselves in humble service. Prayer is too important to just “wing it.” We need to pursue it with the same (or better!) dedication that we give to our physical health.

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The Privilege of Prayer

Pursing prayer sometimes leads to taking prayer for granted. Prayer becomes a habit; a daily activity; even a task to check off the list. But prayer is so much more. Prayer is a lifeline; a divine mystery. I can’t explain how prayer “works.” But I know from experience that it transcends the words I speak and the emotions I feel as I pray. I’m not praying to “a higher power” or an abstract “spiritual being.” I pray to the One who created me, and the One who loves me more than I can even comprehend.

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More than that, I am praying to the One who oversees the universe, and all the inhabitants thereof. There is something powerful and mysterious about prayer. I was reminded of that just recently, when I asked for prayer for my mother, who fell and injured herself. She is 88 years old, and very frail. She is also beloved by many in her family and community. Within minutes of posting a very general request for prayer, several dozen people had responded– some with a simple message of “praying” or “sending prayers.” The next day, I was more specific, and again, dozens of people responded within minutes– “praying for your mother,” “prayers for healing,” etc.. Suddenly my prayers became more confident and hopeful. And I was reminded of all the prayers I lift up each day–those “daily prayers” that sometimes seem like little tasks. They are unique, personal, and important– not just to me, but to many others.

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I shared recently about praying for others’ requests. This is also a privilege. In a mysterious and divine way, when we pray for others we join in God’s work of bringing hope, healing, and love to others. I can pray for others (and they can pray for me) regardless of where I am, or what my situation may be. I cannot always DO something, or BE somewhere. I can always pray. And where I can act, prayer often sharpens and directs my actions to be more effective.

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If you’ve ever tried to help in the aftermath of a disaster (as a member of the general public and not an emergency worker or someone deployed to help), you know it can be frustrating. If you’ve ever been caught in a disaster zone, you know it can be frightening AND frustrating. People do their best to help and offer hope, but in times of chaos and lack of communication, people can be left behind and resources can be misdirected or spoiled before they can get to those who need them most. Prayer never gets misdirected. It never goes unanswered or forgotten; it is never a wasted effort. God is faithful. His ways may be difficult for us to understand, but they are not warped, doomed, or limited in any way.

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There is great comfort in that reality. Sometimes, we just need to be reminded of how powerful and necessary our prayers are. God loves to hear them. He loves to answer them. He loves to use them for His glory and our wholeness. What a privilege to carry EVERYTHING to God in prayer!

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Always Remember, Pray, Give Thanks

The Apostle Paul is consistent in opening most of his letters with a phrase that uses the same four key words– Always, Remember, Prayers, and Thank. The order of the words may change, but the idea stays the same. Paul is always remembering others, always praying for them, and always thankful to God for them.

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Paul uses similar phrasing whether addressing individuals, like Timothy or Philemon, or church groups, like the Ephesians or Philippians. But the message is always very personal. He is not saying a general “Thank You” to God for people “like” Philemon, or “like” the church in Ephesus. He is remembering shared burdens, shared laughter, shared experiences, and thanking God for those deeply held memories. He is lifting up individual burdens, such as the on-going disagreement between Euodia and Syntyche in Philippi (Philippians 4:2), or Timothy’s stomach problems (1 Timothy 5:23).

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It is easy, and costs nothing, to pray generic prayers for a large, faceless mass of strangers. It is easy to love humanity from afar. It is another thing to enter into another person’s “messiness” and “bear one another’s burdens” (Galatians 6:2); to remember struggles and sacrifices made on behalf of others (or to remember being the one in great need of another’s sacrifices). Life– abundant, vibrant, and glorious–calls us to get involved. Not just from the sidelines, not just when it’s convenient, but “always.”

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Prayer calls us to be involved. That doesn’t mean we can’t pray “general” prayers– for peace in foreign lands, or and end to drought or hunger, etc. But we must not neglect “wrestling” prayers–prayers for our unsaved loved ones, prayers for persecuted believers (whether next door or around the world), prayers for our community workers, and prayers for those who are in need. Nor should we neglect prayers of remembrance and thanksgiving for those who have come into our lives. Finally, we need to be willing to let individuals KNOW that they are being remembered, prayed for, and appreciated.

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One of the greatest blessings I know is remembering all the special people who have crossed paths, shared the journey, and borne shared burdens with me, and knowing that each person, each memory, each moment, is eternally and infinitely precious to God! What a privilege it is to share good times and even “battle scars” with so many amazing, unique, beloved people! What a privilege to lift them up before the throne of grace!

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I Will Give You Rest..

I love revisiting the promises of God. But I have to be careful not to make God’s promises into something they are not.

In Matthew 11, Jesus gives a promise– “I will give you rest.” But sometimes, I read more (or less) into this promise than Jesus meant.

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV) via biblegateway.com

First, Jesus bids us come to Him. There are times I want rest, but I want it on my terms– I want ease, comfort, rest, and renewal in the middle of my own plans, activities, and even rebellion. When we pray, we need to come to Jesus, not demand that He come to us.

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Next, Jesus offers rest to those who are weary and burdened. Similarly, Jesus said He came to save those who were lost, NOT those who already saw themselves as justified. If I come to Jesus asking for perpetual rest– never willing to trust Him when He asks me to exert myself or carry a burden–I will never know complete rest or fulfillment in Him.

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In the very next verse, Jesus offers a yoke– certainly not a symbol of rest for most of us!–and He offers to teach us to find rest. Rest is not a gift like grace or love, even though Jesus “gives” it to us. Rest is a reward. And Jesus makes it clear that He will be with us every step of the way as we work and rest in Him. A yoke has many bad connotations– slavery or bondage, burdens, toil, and hard labor in the hot sun–but it can also have a positive meaning. Oxen who are yoked together share the load– with the lead ox taking the brunt of the burden, and the yoke-fellow carrying a lesser share. Imagine one ox trying to pull the load alone! Yet that is what many of us are doing– trying to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders and pushing away the One who wants to share our load and lead us in the best and most restful paths.

We don’t do much work with teams of horses or oxen in my community. We have powerful machines that make quick work of heavy loads– our burdens have less to do with loads of grain or logs, and more to do with mental and emotional stress. But Jesus reminds us that He is “gentle and humble in heart”–that the rest He promises is rest for our souls.

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What a wonderful promise in these turbulent times! Will we take up this offer? Will we claim this promise of our Loving Father to share our burdens and bring us to a place of rest?

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