Tag: despair

Prayers in the Dark

We live in dark times. War, hatred, terrorism, oppression, destruction, and despair– they are all around us. And yet, we pray. We do not succumb to the darkness, but we seek out the light. Many Christians pray in literal darkness, as they have no electricity, or they are in dark prisons, or they worship in secret locations and inner rooms. But many of us pray in figurative darkness– our minds and eyes clouded with overstimulation and muddied theology. And we may pray “in the dark” about the situations faced by our brothers and sisters in other parts of the world– even in other parts of our local communities!

Praying in the dark, much like walking in the dark, involves a lot of caution, and a lot of trust. We pray strategically, knowing there are unseen obstacles and dangers around us, but confident that, with God’s wisdom and presence, we can avoid them and reach our goals.

What are some specific features that prayer should have when we find ourselves in the dark places of life?

  • Fervency–There is a quality of urgent and whole-hearted commitment to seeing God’s face, God’s wisdom, God’s will, God’s timing, and God’s guidance as we pray. “Not my will, but THINE, be done!” Christ, as He prayed in Gethsemane (see Matthew 26:36-46) We may not sweat drops of blood, but we should pray with a fervent desire to offer our bodies as living sacrifices (Romans 12:1)
  • Focus– Sometimes, we can “see” more clearly in the dark. This is because we have fewer (visual) distractions. When we are overwhelmed with darkness, we let go of lesser things and concerns, and we pray for those things we really need, rather than those things we desire. We also have a greater sense of God’s provision and power, so we grow more grateful and joyful for what we DO have.
    ” For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:10 (ESV)
  • Frequency–I pray almost constantly when I am burdened or facing obstacles that seem impossible to overcome. Dark times can remind us that God alone can be trusted to lead us through. HE is God, and I am NOT! And like the men and women of the Bible who faced incredible odds, I can trust Him to hear and act. He sees me, He hears me, He Loves me, and He has a plan for my life that includes being with Him for Eternity!
    “Whom have I in heaven but you?
        And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
     My flesh and my heart may fail,
        but God is the strength of my heart
        and my portion forever.” Psalm 73:25-26 (NIV)
  • Fellowship– This one may seem counter-intuitive. Many times, I feel more alone in the dark. But I have learned that I can actually feel just as lonely in a crowd and in the light. Dark times may make our “circle” smaller, but we may find that our few relationships grow stronger, and we open ourselves up to suffering in others that we would ignore in our carefree days. I think of those who end up on refugee camps or cancer treatment centers– the friendships made there are sometimes stronger than family! 
    “Every time you cross my mind, I break out in exclamations of thanks to God. Each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. I find myself praying for you with a glad heart. I am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us, believing and proclaiming God’s Message, from the day you heard it right up to the present. There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears.” Philippians 1:3-6 (The Message)

Darkness and trials can drive us away from help and hope. But when we learn to Pray in the dark– to seek God with a whole and undivided heart– He will be our light in the darkness and our hope in the midst of desperate circumstances. And we can take comfort, even in the midst of pain and danger, in knowing that we are NEVER alone when we pray– even in the dark! We may not know the perfect words or have the perfect circumstances; we may not be able to see our next step– but we serve a perfect God, who will never let us go. There is no darkness– no circumstance– that can separate us from God’s love or His salvation, or keep our prayers from reaching Him.

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On the Occasion of a Whimper

Have you ever noticed in reading through the Bible how often God shows up, not on the occasion of fanfare and praise, but on the occasion of a whimper? When all hope seems lost, and a heart is so broken it can no longer call out– when words are useless and all that is left is a dull, exhausted moaning?

God “inhabits the praise of His people” (Psalm 22:3), but He is also “close to the brokenhearted” (Psalm 34:18). We work so hard to get close to the heart of God, but sometimes, we need to be broken to actually get there. We need to experience the God who finds us in our failures and rescues us from disasters– even those of our own making. God loves us enough to come to us in our brokenness– and He loves us too much to leave us there. God is not a “fairy godfather” who will magically make our circumstances comfortable and painless. But He is a true Father, who will provide comfort and strength to get back up and face the future with hope and courage.

Long ago, a woman named Hagar was despondent. She was a slave who was told by her mistress to sleep with the master so he could have a son. Hagar got pregnant when her mistress couldn’t, and she became proud and disdainful toward her mistress. When she was punished for her arrogance, she ran away into the desert–a foolish and impulsive act, as she had nowhere to go and no one to support her or her unborn son. An angel found her by a spring of water and told her to return and submit to her mistress. Several years later, she and her son, Ishmael, were sent into the desert because of Ishmael’s contempt for his brother. Ishmael was near death, and his mother in despair. Not being able to watch her son die, she moved a short distance away and began to sob. But another angel came and showed Hagar a well of water. He reminded her that God had seen her the first time she ran to the desert, and He had heard her crying this time, too. Hagar was not a queen; she was not a warrior princess or the daughter of a noble. She was not righteous or innocent. She was a rebellious slave; the victim of a sinful scheme, but headstrong and rash. God did not stop her from running away; He did not give her victory over her mistress. But God rescued Hagar and Ishmael. And He blessed them both– on the occasion of a whimper. (See Genesis 16 and Genesis 21)

Today, don’t be afraid to whimper. Don’t pretend that everything is under your control– it isn’t. But be willing to look and listen for the ways that God will show himself. It may be in the words of a stranger; it may be in the beauty of a sunset; it may even be that song on the radio, or a cool drink of water in the middle of a desert. God doesn’t always rescue us from sorrow and pain. Sometimes He rescues us through it.

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Hannah and Her Rival

Hannah is a Bible heroine. Her story is an inspiration to many women who suffer, whether from infertility, depression, or being misunderstood. Hannah is a popular girl’s name.
Peninnah, on the other hand, is a name you rarely hear today. No one wants to name their child after a bully, and a rival to a Biblical matriarch.

As we read through the story in 1 Samuel, https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+Samuel+1&version=NIV it seems hard enough that Hannah is barren. Especially as it is revealed that God is responsible for her condition. It seems unfair and harsh. But her trouble doesn’t end there. She has a rival–Elkanah’s other wife– who provokes, irritates, and taunts her, making her cry and keeping her in a state of anguish and stress. Peninnah has many children. She has reason to be joyful and proud. Yet she spends her time harassing and hurting Hannah, a woman who is already “beneath” her in society.

Rivalries tend to bring out the worst in us. Catfights, gossip, taunting, undermining others–books, movies, and even TV series have been built on such pettiness. Whether rivals at school, rivals in romantic relationships, rivals in business, or rivals in our own inflated egos, we allow our world to be narrowed to focus on two people who don’t even exist! We magnify our rival’s faults, twist her motives, and hold grudges over what she “probably” meant when she said “that.” And we justify our overreactions, our grievances, and our tendency to see ourselves as innocent victims.

In the case of Hannah and Peninnah, their world was already small. They were sharing a husband and a household, and likely somewhat isolated from the kind of society with which we are familiar. We live in societies where polygamy is illegal and wives do not (generally) live together. Our families tend to live in single units of husband, wife, and children. However, we also live in a society where fidelity is becoming more rare. Marriages break down, couple break up, and “sharing” a husband, if not a household, is more common than we might admit. Even in divorce and remarriage, we may find a rival in our husband’s ex-wife, or our ex-husband’s new partner, or our partner’s ex-mother-in-law (or our current mother-in-law) or among our step-children.

Elkanah is not an innocent bystander in all this. We don’t know why he has two wives, and the Bible doesn’t say that Elkanah did NOT love Peninnah, but it makes a point of saying that Elkanah DID love Hannah (suggesting that he might have been indifferent to his other wife). Also, the Bible is silent about whether or not Elkanah was aware of the rivalry going on under his roof. He seems totally oblivious and largely absent. Even though he loves Hannah, he doesn’t take care to protect her from Peninnah’s spite.
Once again, we find parallels in our own situations– husbands who feel overwhelmed or blind-sided by the rivalries going on around them; husbands who ignore the firestorms; even men who revel in being the focus of so much attention.

But, before we label Peninnah the great villain of this story (or turn our anger on Elkanah for letting their rivalry continue), let’s be careful not to rush to judgment. The Bible doesn’t call Peninnah a villain, merely a rival. It says that she provoked Hannah, and taunted her, and even made her cry. However, the story is focused on Hannah. Her reaction to this taunting was to do what so many of us do– to let it heap up on her and push her down into anguish. Hannah doesn’t fight back. But neither does she stand up to her rival. If Peninnah is trying to make Hannah feel worthless and depressed, she succeeds because Hannah allows herself to believe it.

I think there are several key lessons here, and I think God tells us the whole story because He wants us to see these lessons:

  • Rivalries and conflicts WILL arise in our lives. We shouldn’t pretend otherwise or refuse to deal with them. If you have a rival in your life at this moment, stop and think of ways you can seek peace. Pray, reach out, seek help. This is especially important where children are involved. If you have a rivalry with in-laws, ex-spouses, your children’s step-parents, it WILL impact all your relationships. It will be the way your children learn to relate to others. Whether you are the “bully” or the “middle man” or the “doormat”, you have a responsibility to make an effort to restore harmony. You cannot change the other person, but you can (with God’s help) change the way you build your legacy. And God can change everyone involved.
  • While Hannah did well not to react to Peninnah with her own spite and malice, she let her rival “win” by saying and doing nothing. Jesus teaches us that we are not to ignore those who hate or despise us, but to love them and pray for them. Hannah could have offered to reach out to Peninnah and her children, but she remained isolated. Maybe that was because of Peninnah’s actions or bitterness, but the Bible doesn’t say that Hannah made any effort to end this rivalry, either. She didn’t seek help from her loving husband, and she didn’t seek help from her loving God until she was at the end of her rope.
  • Spite, malice, bitterness, or even self-righteousness (or whatever else may have prompted Peninnah’s nastiness) not only hurts others, it hurts us and blinds us to the opportunity to do good. Peninnah had many children and lived in the same household with Hannah. Instead of taunting her and causing her grief, she could have opened up her heart to allow for a happy, unified family. Peninnah’s hurtful actions are her legacy to every generation that reads this story. She may have been a wonderful mom, a talented women, a real beauty– but she will always be known as the rival who made Hannah miserable. Our actions, even in our own household, have eternal consequences. Small acts of pettiness and spite can follow us for the rest of our lives, destroying our reputations, and blotting out all our other “good works”.
  • Our abilities, skills, talents, status, or fertility DO NOT define our worth. God closed Hannah’s womb– he never closed His heart toward her. He gave her a husband who loved her and provided for her. He kept his eyes on her until the time was right to bless her in a supernatural way. God had opened Peninnah’s womb, but she kept her heart closed, and bragged about her children as though she alone were responsible for them. God had provided Peninnah with a husband who provided for her and created a family with her. She had children and a secure home, and reason to sacrifice to God with thanksgiving, yet her focus, even during her visit to the tabernacle, seems to have stayed on destroying her rival.
  • What makes Hannah a heroine in this story is NOT the way she bears up under bullying. Even though she didn’t get sucked into anger and malice, she fell victim to despair and depression. Hannah’s victory comes ONLY after she turns everything over to God in prayer. Peninnah’s pettiness is crushed by God’s miraculous provision.
  • We should also learn from Peninnah’s actions. Peninnah, even though she has been blessed with children, watches as her husband gives a double portion to his “other” wife– because he loves her. The Bible doesn’t say that he loves Hannah more or better than Peninnah, but Peninnah seems to be resentful of whatever love he gives to anyone else. How often am I envious of someone without considering the pain or grief they may be experiencing? How often do I provoke others by “showing off” my blessings or rubbing in what I perceive to be God’s favor? God loved Peninnah. He blessed her with a loving husband and children. But she seems to be ungracious and mean-spirited. Am I a secret “bully” to others, instead of seeing them as precious and loved by our Heavenly Father?

God’s love can change relationships and rivalries. God’s blessings are “enough.” And when we focus on God’s provision, instead of our rivals’ provocation, we will experience peace and productivity. That’s what happened for Hannah. May this be true in our lives, too– That we would turn to God, and replace bitterness, pettiness, pain and rivalry with His joy, fulfillment, and grace.

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Hannah and Her Husband

1 There was a certain man from Ramathaim, a Zuphite from the hill country of Ephraim, whose name was Elkanah son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephraimite. 2 He had two wives; one was called Hannah and the other Peninnah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah had none.

3 Year after year this man went up from his town to worship and sacrifice to the Lord Almighty at Shiloh, where Hophni and Phinehas, the two sons of Eli, were priests of the Lord. 4 Whenever the day came for Elkanah to sacrifice, he would give portions of the meat to his wife Peninnah and to all her sons and daughters. 5 But to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, and the Lord had closed her womb. 6 Because the Lord had closed Hannah’s womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. 7 This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the Lord, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat. 8 Her husband Elkanah would say to her, “Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?”

We don’t normally spend much time studying Samuel’s father, Elkanah. Yet the story of Hannah and Samuel begins with this man. Not only that, but it begins with a lesson in his genealogy and heritage. We learn that Elkanah was from Ramathaim (a town in the hill country of the tribal lands of Ephraim). As a Zuphite, however, Elkanah (and thus his son, Samuel) were also descended from the Kohathites, and were of the Levitical priestly line.

Hannah was one of two wives of Elkanah. We don’t know why Elkanah had two wives, but we know that the other wife, Peninnah, had children; likely several (see verse 4). Hannah, however, was barren– and this was “because the Lord had closed her womb.” There is nothing to indicate that this a result of any sin on the part of Hannah or Elkanah–there is no reason given for God’s decision to keep Hannah from becoming a mother. There is also no reason to believe that Elkanah was angry or disappointed or embarrassed by Hannah’s condition. In the society of that time, a man could divorce his wife for minor offenses; in this society, barrenness would be seen as a major defect, a stigma, and grounds for divorce. Hannah faced the possibility of rejection, abandonment, and condemnation from her husband. Yet Elkanah loved Hannah, and honored her with a double portion for their yearly offering.

Even with a loving and supportive husband, however, Hannah is inconsolable. And it is here that I think many of do a disservice to Elkanah. The Bible tells us that Peninnah taunted Hannah and drove her to tears. When she would not eat, Elkanah asked some basic questions. Why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you downhearted? and the one that always makes me cringe– Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?

These questions always bothered me. It seemed to me that Elkanah was either clueless or in denial about the bitter rivalry going on under his very roof. And his questions seemed to underline his ignorance.

A closer look at the context, however shows that Elkanah may be more a victim of our modern cultural understanding than a victim of any deficiencies as a husband. It says on the day that Elkanah was to sacrifice– an indication that he was inside the tabernacle and on duty –that Peninnah was taunting Hannah. If Elkanah was ignorant of the torment Hannah faced, it may very well be that it was being kept from him by Hannah herself.
As a woman, I’m also guilty of expecting that my husband will “pick up” on non-verbal clues, or otherwise intuitively “understand” why I am depressed, or tired, or angry. Husbands, as loving and attentive as they may be, are not mind readers, and I have been guilty of making mine play a frustrating guessing game as he seeks to offer help. Men are also more likely to start by asking questions to “get to the root” of the problem, when we are seeking comfort and understanding, before we seek a solution. Elkanah and Hannah are no different in this respect than most of us today. Hannah is not a superwoman–she cries at the party and won’t eat. Elkanah is not a superman–he can’t “fix” Hannah’s sadness, nor can he feel the total depth of her despair.
Finally, Elkanah asks a question that gives us a window into his own secret anguish. “Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?”
I want to rest here for a minute. I think we tend to get caught up in the words, and miss the heart of this plea. What is he really expressing? I don’t think Elkanah is trying to exaggerate his worth, nor is he trying to minimize Hannah’s desperation. But there is a heartfelt cry to be “enough.”
So many times, when we face infertility, miscarriage, or the loss of a child, we focus on the mother’s feelings of loss and emptiness. In this story, we look at Hannah as being an outsider in her own family– the wife who “can’t”–the one who is in distress. Elkanah’s question may even seem insensitive and arrogant. Listen to it again, though, and you can hear the broken heart of a man who loves his wife, even as she is pulling away and allowing her grief to consume her. “Don’t I mean more to you?” “Am I not enough to keep you from despair?” Yes, Elkanah has children with Peninnah, but he longs for happiness and fulfillment in his relationship with Hannah. The Bible never says how many children Peninnah had, but it seems clear that in Elkanah’s eyes, Hannah was worth far more than “ten sons.”


I am broken as I think of times when I have been so consumed in my own grief and “neediness” that I have pushed away those who love me most, shutting them out, and making them question their own worth.

How many times have I done the same to the Lover of My Soul?

How many times do I focus on the one thing I don’t have, or the two annoying people in my life, and ignore the blessings God has poured out? When was the last time I made an extra effort to communicate to my husband how much he DOES mean to me, instead of leaving him to wonder? How many tears have I poured out with my face turned away from my Loving Father?

Hannah’s husband asks some leading questions– they lead Hannah to collapse before the only one who can bring healing and joy. Hannah’s prayer comes from a point of being broken– far more than needing a child, Hannah needs the love and understanding her husband longs to give her, and the joy and blessing her Heavenly Father has been waiting to offer.

Elkanah’s heart is to have joy and oneness with Hannah– with or without children. God’s heart is to have a joyful and trusting relationship with you. And with me. Today, I want to be open with God about whatever is breaking my heart– even though He already knows. Hiding my hurt, wallowing in it, and saying to God, “No. You are NOT enough!” will keep me in a downward spiral. Letting God prove that He IS enough is the way forward into healing, joy, and peace.

We know the end of this story– Hannah pours out her heart to God and God responds with compassion and blessing. He opens Hannah’s womb, giving her and her husband a son who will go on to play a key role in Israel’s history and God’s story of redemption. He continues to bless Hannah and Elkanah with other children, and, hopefully, a renewed relationship of joy and commitment.

May our prayer journey today lead us toward the Love of our Good Father– whether from a place of brokenness, need, confusion, joy, frustration, or victory.

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“Don’t Mess With Mister In Between”

You’ve got to accentuate the positive
Eliminate the negative
Latch on to the affirmative
Don’t mess with Mister In-Between

You’ve got to spread joy up to the maximum
Bring gloom down to the minimum
Have faith or pandemonium (is)
Liable to walk upon the scene
“Accentuate the Positive” by Harold Arlen/Johnny Mercer

This popular song came out in 1944, as thousands of soldiers were dying in World War 2, and millions were facing homelessness and starvation in Europe, Asia, and northern Africa. Its syncopated rhythms and upbeat lyrics helped focus minds and hearts on hope in a world torn apart by war, hatred, and despair. Further lyrics refer to biblical characters Jonah and Noah, and their experiences facing “dark” times.

The Bible gives us similar (and more specific) advice. The Apostle Paul wrote from prison to believers in hard-pressed Philippi:

6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:6-8 (NIV)

In other words– Accentuate the Positive and latch on to the affirmative!

To the Ephesian believers, he says:

The Old Way Has to Go (or, Eliminate the Negative):

And so I insist—and God backs me up on this—that there be no going along with the crowd, the empty-headed, mindless crowd. They’ve refused for so long to deal with God that they’ve lost touch not only with God but with reality itself. They can’t think straight anymore. Feeling no pain, they let themselves go in sexual obsession, addicted to every sort of perversion. But that’s no life for you. You learned Christ! My assumption is that you have paid careful attention to him, been well instructed in the truth precisely as we have it in Jesus. Since, then, we do not have the excuse of ignorance, everything—and I do mean everything—connected with that old way of life has to go. It’s rotten through and through. Get rid of it! And then take on an entirely new way of life—a God-fashioned life, a life renewed from the inside and working itself into your conduct as God accurately reproduces his character in you. What this adds up to, then, is this: no more lies, no more pretense. Tell your neighbor the truth. In Christ’s body we’re all connected to each other, after all. When you lie to others, you end up lying to yourself. Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life. Did you use to make ends meet by stealing? Well, no more! Get an honest job so that you can help others who can’t work. Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift. Don’t grieve God. Don’t break his heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for himself. Don’t take such a gift for granted. Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:17-32 (The Message)

But what does it mean when the song says, “Don’t mess with Mister In Between”? The Bible gives some advice on this as well. The Apostle James has much to say about such a man in the first chapter of his epistle. He talks about being steadfast, not doubting, not double-minded, and not swept up in temptation, blaming others, and justifying his own philosophies:

22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. 23 For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. 24 For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. 25 But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing. James 1:22-25 (ESV)

To James, “Mister In Between” is a shadow man, a person without root or discipline, who will listen to the word of truth, but then turn back to the darkness of the world to justify inaction and/or wrong actions. Mister In Between wants to straddle the fence between sin and obedience, revenge and forgiveness, anger and patience, comfort and compassion. But that doesn’t work. Such a person lives in a false reality– one where his/her “truth” changes with each new experience or emotion, each new encounter with pleasure or grief.

Jesus Himself spoke of the dangers of living “In Between”:

Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. 24 For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will save it. 25 What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit their very self? 26 Whoever is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels… 62 Jesus replied, “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.” Luke 9:23-26;62 (NIV)

13 “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:13-16 (NIV)

We may not be in the midst of a World War (though some reading this may be experiencing war, persecution, and suffering), but we are all involved in a great Spiritual Battle. There are negative forces and philosophies warring with God’s Truth– Anger, Despair, Hatred and Vengeance, Pride, Envy, Power, Greed, and many more. We need to keep our thoughts positively turned toward “whatever is true”.. and noble and praiseworthy– we need to keep our thoughts, prayers, and actions in tune with the teachings of Jesus. We also need to “eliminate” the negativity in our lives– doubts, regrets, shame, lust, bitterness, jealousy, and empty adherence to things of this world– we need to turn our back on old ways of thinking and doing (or NOT thinking or doing) and focus on Jesus. And we need to avoid “messing” with Mister In Between– stop compromising, stop trying to straddle the fence between loving others and making them feel comfortable or superior in their sin at the cost of our own soul.

It sounds easy and jaunty to “accentuate the positive.” But it involves commitment, and the willingness to let go of the negative and the complacent that creeps into our lives. That’s my prayer for today. I hope it is yours, too.

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Jehovah Jireh– The God Who Provides

Often when I am praying, I’m asking for something– “Bless this food,” “bring healing to _______,” “help the victims of (insert recent natural disaster) to find shelter, food, water, etc.,”..

God is a provider. He is the owner of everything, yet He chooses to share good things with us. He provides for the birds of the air and the flowers of the field. He provides for insects and elephants. He provides water and sunlight for all the plants– whether in the rain forest or the desert. He provides air for us to breathe and provides plants to recycle what we breathe out. He provides for the orphan and the widow, the homeless and the dispossessed. And for those who seem to “have it all”– God is the ultimate source of their riches, too.

In the book of Job, we meet a man who seemed to “have it all.” He was wealthy, healthy, respected, and surrounded by family. And when it all disappeared in a flash, his response was very telling. He said, ” Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will leave this life. The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.” (Job 1:21 CSB). Job had learned that in good times or bad, God was his provider. And Job’s faith in God’s provision and His faithfulness gave him hope, even in the worst of his troubles.

The first time we hear of Jehovah (or Yahweh) Jireh is in the story of Abraham and Isaac and the sacrifice at Mount Moriah. God asks Abraham to take his son– the son of the promise; the son for whom he had waited so long– and give him as a sacrifice. Nowhere else in the Bible does God ask for a human sacrifice– in fact, God says He detests the practices of the nations and religions who sacrifice their children to Molech or other gods. Yet, when Abraham obeys, in spite of whatever fear or horror is conjured up by the command, God stops him and provides a ram as an alternate sacrifice. Abraham names Him Jehovah Jireh– the LORD who will provide–as a result of that experience. (See Genesis 22)

But Jehovah Jireh means more than just God providing what we need in the moment or what we ask for in prayer. It also means, “the LORD who perceives, or experiences.” God does not just stand removed from our situation and write a blank check for us to cash when or how we see fit. God is with us (Emmanuel) and sees our deepest and most profound needs. He also sees our daily and even seemingly silly needs. He knows, He cares, and He provides good gifts. God did not send Abraham and Isaac alone on their perilous mission. He was right there, ready to step in and provide what was needed. What an amazing turn-around for Abraham. He went from anguish to absolute joy in those precious moments, and learned to know God in a personal, experiential, and powerful way.

Sometimes, we lose sight of that. Sometimes, it seems as though God is far away and indifferent, or even cruel. When Job accepted the loss of his wealth, his health, his status, and all of his children, it was not easy for him to say, “Blessed be the name of the LORD.” God had taken away nearly everything– in fact, the only things Job had left were some unhelpful finger-pointing friends and a complaining wife! But God restored everything that Job had lost, and then some! God does take away. And it hurts. He doesn’t stop us from experiencing heartache and grief. But even then, He is Jehovah Jireh– the LORD who experiences; the LORD who perceives. He does not leave us without hope or comfort, if we seek His face. As the Psalmist says: “The nights of crying your eyes out give way to days of laughter.” (Psalm 30: 5b The Message)

The story of Abraham and Isaac; the story of Job and his losses– each points us to another truth about how God is our provider. He provided His own Son to be our sacrifice– to pay the debt for our Sin, and to give us Eternal Life (see John 3:16). God experienced all the anguish and loss of death so that we would only have to taste it once. Jesus lost everything to gain our redemption. And He rose victorious over death, so we can have hope and joy in this life and in the life to come!

Recently, I was worried about finances– not because we had no money, but we had unexpected bills. I asked the LORD to provide, knowing that He could, but expecting that we would have to raid our “rainy day” fund to get through the week. But God had an amazing surprise– an unexpected gift of $100! Just when we needed it. God could have provided ten dollars, or a thousand dollars. He could have allowed us to dip into the “rainy day” fund and provided some unexpected money the following week. But I believe God saw, not just our monetary need, but my need to be reminded of His loving care and faithfulness. God knew what we needed. He provided what we needed. And He shared in our experience of dependence on Him and joy in His creative answer.

I don’t know where I will be today or tomorrow. I don’t know what needs are on the horizon. And I don’t know how or what God will provide. He may not provide healing for a disease, but strength for the fight. He may not provide a cash gift for our material needs, but He may provide opportunities to trade with neighbors or earn extra money when we need it next. Whatever God chooses to do– whatever He gives or takes away– He is my provider of abundant life. “Blessed be the Name of the LORD!”

(For more about this Name of God, see https://www.christianity.com/wiki/god/what-does-it-mean-that-god-is-jehovah-jireh.html)

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TGIF!

Many people look forward to Friday. For students and many workers, it marks the end of the working week and heralds the weekend. For many, it may also be payday! Fridays represent accomplishment; completion of work done, reward for recent efforts; a measure of our success. We chant “T.G.I.F.”– “Thank God it’s Friday.” But we might just as easily say, “Thank God it’s Finished!”

We’re in the Lenten season, leading up to Easter, and, of course, Good Friday. Much more significant than any ordinary Friday, Good Friday is the day we remember the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ. It was on that day that Jesus Himself cried, “It Is Finished!” just before He took his last breath.

On that first “Good Friday” there seemed to be little reason for celebration. Jesus had been found guilty in a hasty, overnight trial, by the Jewish Sanhedrin for saying that He was the Son of God– Blasphemy if one is NOT God, but simple truth if one is the promised Messiah! The Roman Governor, Pontius Pilate, after examining Jesus’ claims and trying to literally “wash his hands” of the case, turns Jesus over to be crucified by the angry mobs whipped up by the Jewish leaders. And Jesus is beaten, tortured, taunted, and nailed to a cross to die a gruesome, public death. “It is finished!” For Jesus’ followers, this meant defeat, fear, and gloom, rather than accomplishment or celebration.

But Jesus knew better. Even though His death was filled with suffering and humiliation, it was the culmination of His life on earth. And it was the necessary final scene before the next Act– the Acts of the Apostles–the coming of power and hope by the release of the Holy Spirit to indwell those who had put their faith in Jesus AS the Messiah! And so it is today. We have great cause to celebrate Good Friday. Without the Pain of the Cross, there would be no Glory of the Resurrection or Promise of Eternal Life!

Even though this Friday is not Good Friday, we can spend today reflecting on the life of Jesus– the incredible example He gave of how we are to trust in God, love others as God loves, and cherish life–both now and through eternity, as God’s gift. And we can be thankful that, because of Jesus, “IT IS FINISHED!”– the battle against Sin and Death is over. We can live abundant lives, without the fear of eternal death, and we can look beyond the curse of Sin to the Glory of Restoration and Renewal.

Thank God it’s Friday!

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Finding Beauty in the Broken

The other day, a local artist stopped by our shop. He commented on the giant mirrors we have lining the north wall of the store. I explained that when we first moved in, the mirrors were left over from a dance studio that had once inhabited the space. They left the mirrors and the barres on the opposite wall. We liked them and left them in place. The mirrors bring in a lot of extra light, and they make our space look bigger than it actually is. The barres make convenient spaces to hang linens and other items for display.

The artist nodded. I went on to explain that we hated the thought of someone removing the mirrors (four panels that run about 7 feet in height and stretch about 30 feet along the wall) because of the risk that they would be shattered and ruined. Then, the artist told his story. One of his early studios was in a small garage lined with large mirrors. Like us, he liked that the mirrors made the small space feel lighter and larger. The extra light was also helpful in creating his art. But when he moved to another studio, the panels were removed, and they broke into several pieces. Instead of throwing them out, however, he glued them into a new pattern on the walls of his now larger studio. He used the broken mirrors to create light and beauty– different from before, but with new meaning and renewed purpose.

And it reminded me of what Jesus does for us. We were created to reflect the light of God’s love, to bring light into a dark world. But often, we feel shattered and useless. Sometimes, God is trying to move us into a different space; different circumstances; a different outlook. From our perspective, it looks like failure. We might even try to glue ourselves back into the same old pattern, but without success. And often, we expect God to see us as just so many shattered pieces, ready to be swept up and thrown out. Or something so broken that we no longer have the power to reflect His light.

But God is an artist. He delights in rescuing those of us who are broken. God redeems our purpose and our worth, giving us new and abundant life. He finds beauty in the broken, and a message in our mess. The prophet Jeremiah speaks to this through the artistic metaphor of the Potter and the clay. (see Jeremiah chapter 18) God molds us and shapes us; He has the power and authority to reshape us for new beauty and usefulness. God was speaking to Jeremiah about the nation of Israel. They had broken their covenant with God, and He was about to punish them. But God still had plans for their renewal and their future– including their ultimate redemption at the hands of His Son! God doesn’t give up on us. Of course, God’s message through Jeremiah is not only about renewal, but about submitting to His design and purpose for us. We cannot reshape ourselves– whether clay pots or shattered mirrors. Only God has the power to shape our purpose.

But more than that, God can reshape our outlook, so that WE too can see the beauty around us, in spite of the brokenness. We see people differently; we see situations differently. We see possibilities where we used to see only problems. We see hope, where there used to be despair. And we are empowered to reflect that hope to those around us. Even though we have been broken, we can still fulfill our God-given purpose of reflecting light and love and beauty.

God has been preparing me for a big move lately. After several years, David and I will be closing our shop at the end of this year. Someday, another renter or owner may remove the lovely mirrors that line our north wall. And part of my heart feels broken at the thought of “moving on” and starting a new chapter. But my artist neighbor reminded me that there is often great beauty in the broken– if we have the eyes to see it. God isn’t finished with me– I will find a meaningful way to serve and share and reflect His love. It may be in a different way or a different place. And our shop will go on to be used for another purpose at some point. And even if the lovely mirrors are no longer in place, the north wall will have beauty and purpose for someone else.

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“I Hate Waiting…”

One of my favorite characters from “The Princess Bride” is Inigo Montoya. He has a few redeeming qualities– he is a loyal friend; he is intensely (obsessively) loyal to his father’s memory; he is basically honest; and he has a soft spot for lost causes, including a tender-hearted giant and a (mostly) dead pirate/rival/would-be hero.

But Inigo has many failings, as well. He is a drunkard, he lacks the skills to plan great achievements, and he has an over-developed sense of revenge that gets him in a lot of trouble. Also, he hates waiting. And he has done a lot of it– he’s waited over 20 years to track down his father’s killer and challenge him to a duel (the above-mentioned revenge).

When he first meets Westley (the above-mentioned pirate/rival/would-be hero), Westley is climbing a treacherous cliff. Inigo waits at the top as Westley struggles up the rocky crag, trying not to fall to his death. Inigo, ever concerned, calls down to ask how it’s going. He wants to know if Westley can “a-speed things up.” He REALLY hates waiting. Later, as he seeks to rescue Westley, he is told that he must wait at least 15 minutes for the magic potion to work and for Westley to regain consciousness. Inigo is delighted when Westley can talk and move his head a little, but he cannot wait for Westley to regain the use of his arms or legs before “storming the castle!”

Not many of us enjoy waiting. Some of us are better at it than others. And it is a character quality that God asks us to develop. Several times in the Bible, God asks us to “wait” or “wait on the LORD.”

When we pray, it is tempting to expect or even demand an immediate, clear answer. If we don’t get it, we fall into two temptations. The first is to despair and/or lose faith. If God doesn’t “show up” right away, we are tempted to believe that He just isn’t listening or doesn’t care about our situation. As time goes by, we may become bitter, angry, sullen, and depressed. We stop calling out to God; we turn away and seek answers (or escape) elsewhere.

The second temptation, the one I believe Inigo falls into, is to stop depending on God and carry the burden of our pain, our grief, or our situation all by ourselves. Inigo’s father was killed when he was eleven years old–his entire adult life has been wasted on a quest to avenge his father’s death. He hasn’t developed a life of his own– he has no career (he does odd jobs for crooks like Vizzini), no family, no plans for a sustained future– only his anger and bitterness over a twenty-year-old tragedy. And only when, in desperation, Inigo pauses for a moment and prays, does he find any real help in achieving his goals. In fact, at the end of the story, when Inigo finally achieves his revenge on Count Rugen, he is left with a dilemma. He admits to Westley that he has no idea what to do with the rest of his life! He has allowed the past to consume both his present and his future.

Another story that illustrates this temptation is the story of King Saul. In 1 Samuel 13, Saul has begun to attack the enemies surrounding Israel. He and his troops are hiding in caves and waiting for the prophet Samuel to offer a sacrifice and seek God’s counsel. The enemy is camped nearby with thousands of troops and chariots, and Saul’s men are beginning to panic and desert him. When Samuel doesn’t come at the appointed time, Saul disobeys God’s law by offering the sacrifices himself, even though he is not of the priestly line. Instead of standing firm, and encouraging his men, Saul gives in to the general panic and takes matters into his own hands. He takes a visible action — offering the sacrifice– without taking the right attitude of seeking God’s counsel.

Waiting can be difficult– especially when we are faced with fear, anxiety, danger, and lack of plan or purpose. But learning to wait for God’s ways and timing will teach us how to grow in Faith and confidence. Today, instead of asking God to “a-speed things up,” may we thank Him for all the times He has been faithful in the past, and trust that He will “arrive” at just the right time!

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Where Grief Meets Hope

We lost a family member a couple of weeks ago. We were shocked and heartbroken to hear of his loss. To know that we will never get to hear his laughter or watch his eyes crinkle up over a good joke; never hear him enthuse over history or a great movie; never enjoy the fellowship of being in the same room together again. He never got to retire from his job; never got to walk his daughters down the aisle; never got to enjoy the house he and my sister-in-law planned to build.

BUT

Chris had a wonderful life in many ways. He and his wife have three amazing adult children. He got to enjoy plenty of days loving nature and enjoying a good sunset over Lake Michigan. He harvested many morels each spring. He made music. He helped hundreds of people in hundreds of little ways. He was blessed.

We went to Chris’s funeral last weekend. We helped celebrate his life– his accomplishments and achievements, his vivid personality, his sense of humor– and we celebrated his Faith. Yes, there were tears at the funeral. We will miss Chris in the years to come. But we share his faith and his great hope. We will miss him temporarily. We will grieve for a few years. And then, we will experience a joy that will make us forget the grief! Not only will we see Chris again– to laugh together and share stories and songs– we will be in the presence of our source of Life, and Hope, Joy and Peace! We will be surrounded by the great cloud of witnesses as we live eternally with the One who loves us best!

Many years ago, another man died. There was grief, stunned disbelief, and terror. The family, friends, and followers of Jesus Christ mourned. They hid. Their world was dark with despair and anguish. All these years later, we look at paintings and sculptures of Jesus suffering on the cross. But, while we shudder at the horror of all He suffered, we do not look on such pictures with fear or despair. The Cross is not a symbol of Death’s ultimate victory, but rather its ultimate defeat. Jesus didn’t stay dead. His body was buried, but He did not stay there. We celebrate, not the horrors of the Cross, but the limits of its power to steal our joy.

This is where grief meets hope. It is where the past is overwhelmed by the promise of Eternity. Christians grieve– of course we do. We love life, and we grieve to see it end. We love being with friends and family– we feel an emptiness and an ache when someone we love is “missing.” But we do NOT grieve without hope. We acknowledge the brief sting of loss. But Death loses its sting in the light of Christ’s victory. There is no lasting victory in the grave. Our time is short; we are powerless to stop death from taking us; from taking our loved ones. But Eternity beckons! Even our time on earth gives us daily reminders– the sun rises each morning; spring comes after each winter; children grow into parents, and we get to love another generation.

Even when life is hard; when grief looms large and hope seems dim– hope does not disappoint! Because Christ LIVES!

Chris was buried earlier this week– his body was buried– but he LIVES. He is healed and freed of all the pains and frustrations of this earthly life, and because of Christ’s gift of Grace and Redemption, Chris is living all that he once hoped for. Because of Christ’s great gift, many of us will someday join him in singing God’s praises, in laughter, delight, and endless joy!

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