Why Have You Forsaken Me?

(Please note: This is a post from a couple of years ago, which has been updated and revised…)

Have you ever doubted? Wondered, “Where is God?” Maybe even wondered if He exists at all? And then someone came along and made you feel wicked and small for having such a thought…”How could you!?”

I know there are people who believe that faith is not really faith if you can have moments of doubt– that true faith never wavers, stumbles, or has tough questions. I don’t think this is Biblical, nor do I think this reflects God’s relationship with us. The Bible is full of “faithful” people who had moments of doubt.

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Abraham, when told that he would become the father of many nations, believed, and it was counted as righteousness (Genesis 15:6, Hebrews 11:11, Romans 4:3, etc.) Abraham’s faith was so solid, that he was willing to sacrifice his son, Isaac, the son of God’s Promise! Yet Abraham and Sarah acted outside of absolute faith when they brought in Hagar and tried to start a family on their own. God still blessed Hagar and Ishmael, but they were not part of the fulfillment of God’s plan. And over four thousand years of bad blood between the descendants of Isaac and Ishmael are a sad reminder that Abraham did not trust God absolutely and completely.

King David was a “man after God’s own heart.” Yet David wrote often about his feelings of being abandoned or forsaken by God. (See Psalm 10, Psalm 13, and Psalm 22 among others.) Elijah, within hours of a great victory over hundreds of angry priests of Baal, after a miraculous demonstration of God’s power and faithfulness, hid in despair and asked to die, sure that God had abandoned him to his enemies (1 Kings 19).

Most telling is the statement from Jesus Himself on the cross. “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:45-46; Mark 15:33-34) Although He was quoting one of King David’s psalms (22:1), the words still ask a very harsh question. Did Jesus Himself doubt God’s presence or His boundless love? (I don’t think so, but it is this kind of statement that often invites condemnation from those who cannot allow for any momentary doubt of any kind.)

I don’t believe any of these moments in the Bible are accidental. I believe God wants us to know that His presence and His faithfulness do not depend on the absolute strength of our faith. I believe it is one of the reasons that Jesus spoke of faith “as small as a mustard seed” (Matthew 17:20). It is not the size or the strength of our faith that determines what God can or will do. It is the size and strength of our faith that causes US to understand what God is doing and to participate more fully with Him. And taking our momentary doubts and questions to God shows a different kind of faith– one that is strong enough to BE tested and triumph. God rewards those who SEEK Him. If we never need to seek, or ask, or knock (See Matthew 7:7), could it be that we are not trusting in Him, but in our own wisdom?

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Take heart! Have faith! But don’t be afraid to go through valleys of doubt, or wrestle with difficult questions. And if someone else is struggling–be willing to listen to their doubts and questions, rather than just dismissing them. God does…

March 8, 2023 1

Of Yeast, Mites, and Mustard Seeds

God is interested in the little things. We praise Him for his glory, majesty, and power–rightly so–but He is also the God of atoms, and quiet moments, and insect wings and snowflakes.

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God celebrates with us in our smallest victories–biting our tongue instead of bragging, shaving a minute off our 5K run, not burning the dinner rolls, remembering to put gas in the car for my spouse. He also sees our smallest sins–when no one else is looking; when no one else knows our motives or inner struggle– God sees every detail, every motive. God hears our prayers– not just our big urgent prayers, but our whispered secret prayers; our quick cries for help; our relieved sighs of gratitude; our shameful confessions.

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God often uses yeast as a metaphor for sin–just a tiny bit can ruin everything. One tiny act– a fib, passing along a rumor, snubbing a neighbor at the store, watching “soft” porn on TV, hanging out with the “fun” crowd and taking dangerous risks, gambling “for fun” with money you promise to pay back later, drinking a little too much just a little too often, spending more time with that co-worker who “understands” your marital woes better than anyone…Most of us don’t set out to become addicts, thieves, adulterers, bullies, sexual predators, rage-aholics, embezzlers, or compulsive liars. But Jesus warns us that big sins start small: “murder” really starts with disdain and anger and hate (Matthew 5:21-22); adultery begins with lust; and the love of money (greed) is the root of all kinds of evil (1 Timothy 6:10). Selfishness, pride, envy, rebellion– they lurk in little lies and delayed obedience and easy justification we allow in our daily lives.

But God is not only watching us under a microscope, waiting to catch us in some small act of sin. In fact, that is not His primary desire in watching us. God is searching eagerly for signs of obedience, faith, goodness, love, and kindness.

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Jesus used parables about small things– a lost coin, a mustard seed, a pearl, a speck of dust, the eye of a needle, a narrow door/gate, a lily of the field– to illustrate joy, faith, self-control, obedience, trust, and even the kingdom of God. Small things are important, sometimes even glorious, in God’s eyes. Even some of Jesus’ miracles started with small, humble, simple things– water, five loaves and two fish, a few quiet words, a few tears.

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Today, I want to pray that I will see God moving– not just in grand gestures and eloquent sermons (though I love to see Him move in those ways, too!)–but in the small moments. I pray that I will be sensitive, not to the world’s crushing words of hatred and deception, but to the still small voice of encouragement; to the hopeful smile of a stranger; to the rushing wind that lifts dust mites to glory in the sun; to the unshed tears of a widowed friend. I want to plant the mustard seed of faith and watch how God will grow it. I want to be that cheerful giver of my last coins in gratitude for the riches of Grace that cost me nothing but cost my Savior everything.

August 8, 2022 0

Mustard Seeds..

He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”
Matthew17:20 ESV (via biblehub.com)

Faith is a vital part of life, and especially a life in pursuit of prayer. If I don’t believe that God exists, and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him (Hebrews 11:6) then my prayers are little more than wishes made on a star or empty dreams.

During Jesus’ ministry on earth, He lamented often that His disciples had so little faith. And yet, He said that if they had “faith like a grain of mustard seed,” nothing would be impossible. In fact, Jesus used seeds in a lot of His teaching. He talked of seeds scattered on different types of soil; mustard seeds growing into large plants; seeds in good soil yielding exponentially large harvests. There is something about seeds that can teach us about the nature of faith. And, according to Jesus Himself, we need to learn about and practice faith in greater measure!

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So what are some of the seed lessons we still need to learn?

Seeds start out small. Jesus used a mustard seed, mentioning that it is one of the smallest of all seeds. So often, we want to start out “large” in our faith. We see our doubts as failure, rather than immaturity. We see our slow growth as weakness–and it is! It is that very weakness that God wants to use to show HIS strength. When Jesus “lamented” that the disciples had so little faith, He wasn’t condemning them– instead He was pointing out that faith is a process–that seeds GROW into larger plants.

Seeds do not produce plants unless they are planted! I see websites and Christian bookstores selling jewelry featuring a small glass case with a tiny mustard seed inside. It’s a nice reminder of Jesus’ teaching about faith, but carrying around a mustard seed is NOT the same thing as having faith like a mustard seed. Faith that is never planted and rooted in good soil will remain nothing more than a seed– useful as a piece of decoration, perhaps, but dormant and unproductive. If I have faith “like a mustard seed” in money, or power, or in my own wisdom and skills, it is no more effective than if I throw it on the sidewalk, wear it around my neck, or put it in my pocket.

Seeds need soil, light, and water. Faith doesn’t grow in isolation. I need to listen to others, share with others, and, most of all, live in the good soil of God’s word. I need to pray for others– and I need the prayers of others! I need to talk to God daily; but I also need to read His words to me daily!
Seeds are designed to produce a harvest– fruit, grain, trees, and new seeds! I get distracted, thinking of how faith impacts MY life and my Christian walk. God wants me to grow stronger in my own, yes. But He wants my faith to be multiplied by being visible. Even a root vegetable sends a shoot or a plant above-ground, so there is evidence of growth underground. In doing go, the original seed will disappear! There are days when I cannot see my “mustard seed.” But that is (I hope) because the seed is becoming a mustard plant– producing evidence of God’s sustaining power and love, and providing “seeds” for others to plant.

There are days when my faith may feel small and dead. But I need to remember that the power is not in the “seed” of faith– no matter how small; no matter how large its potential–it is in planting that seed and letting God’s power transform a seed into fruit that will last!

More more on this topic, see:https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/bible-study/what-does-jesus-mean-by-faith-as-small-as-a-mustard-seed.html

November 9, 2020 0

Planting Seeds

I live in Michigan, and our state is in the news, because our Governor has issued a new set of restrictions in light of the ongoing COVID-19 outbreak. There is a “Stay Home; Stay Safe” measure restricting travel and “non-essential” business until the end of April. But parts of her new executive order have drawn criticism–especially her restriction of gardening and landscaping activities. Larger stores are not allowed to sell plants and seeds and gardening implements, as they are considered “non-essential” (as opposed to food and medicine purchases). It is still unclear whether or not gardening centers or roadside businesses can still sell plants or seeds if that is their primary business.

Thousands of residents are upset about these restrictions, and the slippery logic behind allowing liquor sales, sales of lottery tickets, and recreational marijuana, and allowing access to abortion clinics, while seeming to single out gardening, landscaping, home improvement (we can’t buy paint), and other reasonably “safe” activities, and prohibiting families from being with their loved ones– especially those who are dying of non-COVID-19 related causes.

I am not faulting those who are upset, and I won’t use this space to either fault or defend our governor. These are challenging times, and tempers flare, patience grows thin, and people are not always going to think or act at their best.

My point is that we– all of us– are sowing seeds during this time. Maybe not vegetable seeds or herbs or flowers, but seeds of discontent, seeds of anger, seeds of bitterness, and seeds of pride. We don’t need soil or seed packets or starter plants to sow a crop of good or bad spiritual produce. We don’t need to visit a store or garden center to bloom where we are planted.

So today, my prayer is that I would plant the following seeds:

Kindness–Words and deeds that show honor, respect, and love for those around me. Not just my friends, but also those who count themselves my enemies, and those with whom I disagree. Kindness multiplies and brings a fruitful harvest.
Joy–Not phony happiness, but true joy– the kind that doesn’t deny hardship, but gives strength in tough times. The kind that grieves with those who grieve, but offers hope and compassion. It is a sweet balm that brings healing and a lingering fragrance.
Patience–Waiting is not easy. It is not comfortable. But it is quiet strength that doesn’t give way to panic and anger. Patience is a “hardy” plant for any season.
Forgiveness– Forgiveness must be carefully tended in times of distress and uncertainty. We must prune away pride and hurt feelings and the desire for vengeance. Forgiveness is a rare and precious plant.
Gratitude/Contentment–I woke up today. That was a blessing. I opened my eyes and saw a roof over my head. I was warm and wrapped in blankets in a bed in a bedroom in my own apartment. I turned on a light, pulled clothes out of my closet, took a shower, and looked in the refrigerator where I had a choice of food to eat. I can breathe without a respirator, I can walk and use my arms and hands. I can speak and listen. Even in the midst of these times– even if I had no home or food, no running water, and I tested positive for COVID-19, or cancer, or MS–God is with me; God loves me; God knows everything about me; God sent His own Son to die for me when I was still a sinner! Gratitude is like a morning glory, declaring beauty, not because of its surroundings, but because that is its nature and its purpose. We can do the same!

Faith–I saw a meme the other day that said , “If a tiny virus can do this much damage, imagine what mustard-seed-sized faith can do! There is so much confusion, so much doubt, so much despair right now. But Faith, like a mustard seed, can spread and grow, even under (sometimes especially under) adverse circumstances. And Faith is another strong plant that can withstand the strong hot winds of adversity and weather great storms.
Love–Love is like a tomato plant– it just keeps growing and giving and producing. But, like a tomato plant, we need to watch out for blight and worms. True love drives out fear, overcomes, endures…you’ve probably heard all the cliches. But love also involves risk, rejection, and even pain. Make sure you plant your love in good soil and give it the supporting frame of faith in the one who IS Love.

and finally, Prayer– Prayer is a root vegetable; it grows in good soil and where is can’t always be seen. Prayer can thrive in times of quarantine. It is (or should be) untroubled by what is happening “above ground.” It needs the “living water” of God’s Holy Spirit, and the good soil of faith. Its roots are deep, and it provides nourishment for the soul.

April 15, 2020 0

Tag: faith the size of a mustard seed

Why Have You Forsaken Me?

Of Yeast, Mites, and Mustard Seeds

Mustard Seeds..

Planting Seeds

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