Prayer in the Cyber Age

I attend a weekly prayer meeting at our church. A small group of us meets one morning a week to share prayer concerns, pray for our pastors and church workers, missionaries, community members in need, etc. It usually lasts just about an hour. On a “good day,” we have about seven people.

I grew up in a small rural area, and our little country church had a weekly Wednesday evening prayer service. On a “slow night,” we might have seven people. Sometimes, we had thirty or more (nearly half the church congregation)! They lasted about an hour and a half. When I was in college, we had groups that met once a week for prayer. It wasn’t always the same group, but it met at the same time, and, again, we sometimes had as many as thirty in attendance– for prayer. Often, we met in a dorm room, so it was cramped, and many of us were sitting or kneeling on the floor. Once, we had a fire drill, and my feet had “fallen asleep” and I had to be helped as we walked to the exit!

I don’t say this to disparage our current small group, but to point out some of the differences between life in the 1970s, 1980s and today. My current church has activities every Wednesday evening, and much larger attendance than the little country church ever attained. And prayer is still a small part of the Wednesday evening programming. Prayer is encouraged in small groups, individually, and we pray during service. But sustained time set aside for prayer– what the old hymn refers to as “Sweet Hour of Prayer”–in a group setting is becoming more of a rarity.

There are many reasons for it– some good, some not so good.

On the “good” side, it must be noted that corporate prayer today has expanded far beyond the traditional in-person prayer meeting. Prayer can be skyped, group-chatted, zoomed, and conference-called. Prayer can be “hosted” in one location, with satellite groups around the world praying in real time together. In such ways, thousands, and even millions of people can be joined in prayer. This is an amazing development!

And, along with such developments, prayer has become far more global, and far more immediate. I can receive a text or e-mail notifying me of a prayer request from nearly anywhere in the world, and know that I am joining with a host of other Christians when I stop and take a few moments to pray right then.

So what’s the “downside” of cyber prayer?

Speaking as one who has lived the experience of meeting with the same people at a dedicated time over many years specifically to pray, I have observed the following benefits:

In-person prayer meetings offer a more intimate time of fellowship, compassion, and service. I’m not just seeing other people on a screen, reading a text message, or even filling an auditorium seat as part of a huge “movement”– I’m sitting in a circle, breathing the same air, hearing the same hum of the furnace or fluorescent lights, the sound of others breathing, sighing, or even crying quietly around me. Sometimes, I’m holding another person’s hand, or giving them a hug. I am not just among fellow believers, I’m with family. We get to know one another in a deeper way. I know their families, their personal struggles and victories. I learn the rhythm of their prayers, and the issues closest to their hearts– and they know mine! And that can be a scary thing at first– building the kind of trust that intimate fellowship demands. But it pays off a thousand-fold!

In-person prayer meetings are also focused in a different way. Cyber prayer usually focuses on a specific need– sometimes an immediate, or even temporary issue. In-person prayer focuses on the long term discipline of praying. I have prayed with groups over years for lost relatives or unresolved health issues. And while that may seem depressing to read about, in practice it teaches patience, and deepens faith. As a group, we see God’s answers develop according to HIS timing and HIS plan. Sometimes, we see issues resolved quickly; other times, we see how God strengthens us in our trials; and still other times we see God do surprising and miraculous things just as we’ve almost given up hope. And there are some answers we may never “see.” But, primarily, we are not praying for an outcome– we are praying as a pursuit of Christian living; developing a life of prayer, faith, and obedience. We spend much of our time in prayer lifting up requests, but we also spend much of our time in praise, worship, adoration, confession, and thanksgiving– because prayer is a holistic pursuit.

Which brings me to another benefit, one that may not seem obvious at first. Meeting consistently and weekly for prayer is a habit. It builds a character of faithfulness and true compassion like very little else I’ve encountered. God can “show up” wherever two or three are gathered (see Matthew 18:20), and because God is beyond time and space, He can be present in a church meeting room, in cyberspace, or in outer space! But we are temporal. We have to learn patience, hope, and faithfulness. We learn to be trustworthy of the feelings and confidences of others by sharing our hearts. We learn to serve by the practice of serving those around us over an extended period of time. We learn patience by waiting on the Lord, stopping our busy, deadline-driven, goal-oriented lifestyle to make time for the development of our faith.

Finally, in a post-COVID society, sustained, regular, corporate prayer is also sustained, regular, corporate fellowship. We live in an increasingly isolated society. With more people on the earth than ever before, we are more lonely, depressed, anxious, and self-absorbed than ever before. Even in Church! Many people attend service regularly, but still feel unconnected and uninvolved. And others get “involved” in every activity, often burning themselves out trying to “outdo” themselves (or others). Activities that promise fellowship can sometimes fall “flat” in the face of social expectations. We attend, hoping to “get something” out of an experience. We want to be entertained, challenged, encouraged, uplifted, etc. But often, our expectations are not met. We don’t feel included, or we feel overwhelmed. We imagine we are being compared to others (or we do the comparing!), and feel that we fall short. We don’t know enough, do enough, are not “enough.” And we give up. We give up on the church, on other Christians, on God.

Committing to attend a weekly prayer meeting pulls us “out of ourselves.” We learn to pray for the needs of others. We learn to share our own needs and allow others to pray for us. We learn to be transparent and authentic. We learn to forgive.

Prayer is amazing– in any form. Communicating with the God of the Universe is an unspeakably miraculous opportunity, made possible BY God, THROUGH God, for OUR benefit. Prayer in the cyber age is diverse, global, immediate, and effective. But let’s consider the blessing of old-fashioned Prayer Meetings, and not forsake the practice of meeting together (see Hebrews 10:25) , in person, with no other goal than to spend a sweet hour in prayer!

Holiday Poison

Yesterday was Thanksgiving across the U.S. Many families enjoyed a large dinner, surrounded by family or friends. Traditionally, this dinner might include turkey (or ham or both!), vegetables and fruits (potatoes, sweet potatoes, green beans, baked beans, corn, squash or some kind of greens, cranberries or cranberry sauce, apples or fruit salad), dressing, stuffing, rolls, and/or bread, and some dessert, such as pumpkin pie, pumpkin roll, apple pie, or cake. It’s a holiday which focuses heavily on food and eating.

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Because of this, it is also a holiday that carries the risk of food poisoning. Turkey and other meats, if not cooked properly or long enough, can make people sick. So can leftovers that are left out too long or not stored properly after the big meal.

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But there is another kind of poison that can ruin Thanksgiving. It may not make us immediately physically ill, but it is not less dangerous. It is the poison of ingratitude. Like salmonella or other types of bacteria, ingratitude can be invisible. It can hide, waiting to attack without warning, causing everything to have a bitter aftertaste. It may cause violent reactions, such as rage, or lie dormant, causing depression, apathy, or a general dissatisfaction. And just like food poisoning ruining a holiday built around food, ingratitude is a natural problem to have during a time set aside for thankfulness.

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One of the most insidious forms of this holiday poison comes through comparisons–we gather to be near family we love, only to compare ourselves with them. Which one is happier? Wealthier? More popular? More intelligent? Better looking? Is the host’s house nicer than mine (or is my house “good enough”)? Did I work harder? Did my contribution to the meal taste “better”(or was it passed by– again)? Why am I still sitting at “the kids’ table?” The list is endless of the petty grievances that we allow to overwhelm our intentions to be thankful and live in peace. Someone says something to “push our buttons,” or they seem to ignore us completely.

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Another form of holiday poison spreads from person to person–complaining, venting, sounding off, moralizing, criticizing, blaming…what began as a thankful, joyful gathering becomes a snake pit of biting, poisonous talk. And we react. We take the bait, become defensive, get sucked into that political discussion we vowed to avoid, or we revisit old wounds we thought we had put behind us.

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But unlike food poisoning, bitterness and ingratitude are choices. We can’t always choose our circumstances, nor can we choose what others say or do. But we DO choose our reactions and our attitudes. I can blame someone else’s anger or selfishness for my bitterness, but they didn’t MAKE me succumb to their poison. I can compare myself to others and feel arrogant or inept, but no one forces me to live someone else’s life or measure up to their circumstances.

God has given each of us life and breath, and a purpose. Some of His gifts to us are universal and exactly the same for each person. He has given us each 24 hours in each day; He gives sunshine and rain, day and night, and air to breathe. But some of his gifts are unique to each individual. Our response should be to open our unique gifts, so we can enjoy them and use them, NOT waste time coveting someone else’s gift when we have neglected even to open our own.

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I wish I could say that “holiday poison” was easy to avoid– it’s not. It is human nature to grumble and whine and wish for what we do not have. But it IS possible to get healing. It starts with humble confession. We DO wish for what we do not have–and the more we deny and try to bury our failings, the more susceptible we are to the poison they can bring. If we confess our feelings of inadequacy, our desire to have “more” or “better” in life, we can turn to God freely and let Him give us a better perspective. Suddenly, we “see” blessings where we used to see burdens, we can see hope where once there was only grief, and we see opportunities where we only saw obstacles before.

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And God’s power to transform our attitude is just one more wonderful thing to be thankful for!

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