Nothing to Fear But Fear Itself

When I taught public speaking in a local public high school several years ago, we had an entire unit on “stage fright.” Studies showed that the fear of public speaking ranked right alongside the fear of death! But why? Why are we afraid to speak in front of a group? Especially a group of our peers?

It turns out that stage fright has two perfectly logical and definable causes: first is the desire to do well/be successful/be understood, appreciated, and accepted. But this natural desire collides with the realistic possibility that we will make a mistake, or that something will happen to keep us from being understood (like a problem with microphones, or interruptions), or that our message will not be accepted or appreciated. Neither of these thoughts, individually, is unreasonable. But the more we exaggerate them, the less our brain can process the duality. We cannot guarantee that all will go perfectly, nor can we assume that all will go horribly wrong. But the more we worry about all the things that MIGHT go wrong, the more we create stress. Ironically, the stress and fear we generate often leads to mistakes we otherwise might NOT have made!

Part of combating fear, then, is to acknowledge that we want to do well– our best, in fact– in spite of whatever circumstances we might face. Instead of exaggerating what MIGHT go wrong, we must put more energy into what we can control, practice, and mitigate. We also have to stay realistic about what we are likely to achieve in our efforts. This is especially true in a situation where we face an unknown or potentially hostile audience. Our goal is to do the best we can with what we have, not worry about achieving the impossible or controlling what is beyond our ability to control.

I was thinking about this recently as I watched several political candidates in debates, town halls, interviews, and even in their TV ads. Many of them show fear, and even a bit of panic over questions from interviewers, reactions from audiences, and attacks from their opponents. It can be nerve-wracking to face “gotcha” questions from an interviewer– questions that ask you to defend or explain things you said years ago or actions you took under different circumstances. But it can also be an opportunity to clarify a position, show growth and how to learn from past mistakes, or create healthy discussions.

The same holds for Christians who face a hostile or unknown audience for the Gospel. We can be very fearful of sharing the Good News if we allow ourselves to fall into worry and negative thinking. We can face “gotcha” questions from opponents– “Why does a ‘Good’ God allow Evil and suffering in the world?” “Why does God send people to Hell?” “What about good people who die without hearing the Gospel?” “I know you. You’re not perfect. Who are you to judge me?”

But the truth is that God hasn’t asked us to have all the answers to “gotcha” questions. He hasn’t asked us to produce “mic-drop” moments in which we stun our opponents into humiliation. But we ARE to be ready, willing, and able to defend– and let’s be clear about this– OUR hope in the Gospel. It is not our job to force everyone around us to accept a particular doctrine, or set of beliefs. It is not our job to make others change their minds or hearts. It IS our job to testify to the Goodness that God has shown to us– even while acknowledging that we continue to suffer in this life– not to explain away God’s actions or other people’s experiences. We don’t have to be out there winning arguments. We just have to be prepared to Speak UP!

The Apostle Peter seems not to have suffered from “stage fright.” He always spoke out– and sometimes regretted it later! But he gives us this wise advice in his first epistle:

 If with heart and soul you’re doing good, do you think you can be stopped? Even if you suffer for it, you’re still better off. Don’t give the opposition a second thought. Through thick and thin, keep your hearts at attention, in adoration before Christ, your Master. Be ready to speak up and tell anyone who asks why you’re living the way you are, and always with the utmost courtesy. Keep a clear conscience before God so that when people throw mud at you, none of it will stick. They’ll end up realizing that they’re the ones who need a bath. It’s better to suffer for doing good, if that’s what God wants, than to be punished for doing bad. That’s what Christ did definitively: suffered because of others’ sins, the Righteous One for the unrighteous ones. He went through it all—was put to death and then made alive—to bring us to God. 1 Peter 3:14-18 (The Message)

Peter doesn’t give us a false promise that everyone will like us or accept our message. In fact, he makes it clear that even Jesus was rejected and suffered at the hands of those who heard the truth from His own lips! Our goal is not to force someone else to accept the truth– but to testify to the truth as we know it, understand it, and live it out. We are not the ones who will judge who goes to Heaven or Hell. We are not the ones who wrote the Law. But we speak of these things because we hold them to be eternal, vital truths. Our job is to let Christ speak through us– not just in our words, but in our Christlike attitude and actions.

We don’t have to fear the crowds– though they may pose very real dangers. We don’t have to fear even those who oppose or oppress us. If we are following our Savior, the only thing in this world to fear…is fear itself.

“Lord, today, I ask for a heart of joy and boldness as I prepare to have an answer for those who would question my Faith and Hope in You. Help me to remember how much You love them, even if they are not willing to accept my words or actions. May I speak to them as You would– with unwavering truth, and unwavering compassion. Thank you for the reminder that you have not given me a ‘spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.’ (2 Timothy 1:7 New King James Version) Keep my mind focused on You and immune to fear. In Jesus’ name, AMEN!”

Praying For Justice

There are a lot of unjust things in this world. And there are a lot of things that seem unjust to us, even when we know they will happen; even when we know they are part of God’s will.

Death seems unjust. So does disease. Poverty seems unjust. Natural disasters seem unjust. Yet they are the just consequence of sin. All have sinned; all must die. Sin causes an imbalance in God’s world– therefore, nature acts in ways that cause disasters and disease. Poverty stems from many sources– greed, laziness, theft– and while some of them may be caused by our own sin, many of the causes stem from the sin of others. And justice is usually beyond our ability to exact.

It is deep in the human heart to cry out for “justice.” But most of the time, we only want what we think is fair or proper from our own outlook. And we want it “NOW!” We want things to be simple and convenient. We want to be justified. We want to be “right” and to be “rewarded” for being so.

Jesus told an interesting parable in the book of Luke. It concerns a widow who was denied justice by a corrupt judge. Even though her case had merit, he would not hear it. He was not interested in giving her justice. But she persisted. She finally annoyed him so much that he gave her what was rightfully hers.

18 And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart. He said, “In a certain city there was a judge who neither feared God nor respected man. And there was a widow in that city who kept coming to him and saying, ‘Give me justice against my adversary.’ For a while he refused, but afterward he said to himself, ‘Though I neither fear God nor respect man, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will give her justice, so that she will not beat me down by her continual coming.’” And the Lord said, “Hear what the unrighteous judge says. And will not God give justice to his elect, who cry to him day and night? Will he delay long over them? I tell you, he will give justice to them speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?”
Luke 18: 1-8 (ESV)

Jesus does not mean to imply that God is like the unjust judge. God does not close His ears to our cries for justice; But He also does not see our situation from our point of view. God WILL allow our loved ones to die. He may hear our prayers for temporary healing, but He will not prevent us from all grief or loss. And we may have to live through disease, poverty, and other circumstances that seem unfair or unjust– at least for a while.

Jesus is reminding his disciples (and US!) that God not only hears our prayers, but He cares about our needs, and He hates injustice even more than we do. God will not just act reluctantly to bring about justice for one widow. God will end the sting of death, the corruption of sin, and the need to cry out for justice once and for all. And even in this life, He can and often will give us miraculous answers to our problems with injustice. But there is a caution at the end of this parable. Do we have faith? I don’t mean the kind of faith that hopes and wishes that everyone in a particular situation will “get what is coming to them.” Nor is He talking about a faith that says, “God helps those who help themselves.” Rather, Jesus is talking about a faith that lifts up a situation to Him, knowing that He– and He alone– WILL keep His promises in His time and in His fashion. The kind of faith that can rest secure in knowing that “HE WILL DO IT!”

Are you trusting for justice today? Are you still waiting? Don’t stop praying. But more importantly, don’t stop believing!

Out of the Same Mouth

Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. 10 Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. 11 Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? 

James 3:5-10 NIV via biblegateway.com (emphasis added)

‘We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.’

Epictetus (Greek philosopher)

Have you ever made a tape of you speaking, and played it back to listen to yourself? Or have you had someone remind you of what you said earlier in the day or week? Have you been astonished to hear what came out of your mouth (or how someone else interpreted your words)? James, the brother of Jesus, had much to say about the dangerous power of an untamed tongue. “Fire”, “poison”, “corrupt”, “restless”, “evil”, and “deadly” are harsh words, but we should heed James’ warning.

Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing…
Out of the same mouth come worship and complaining…
Out of the same mouth come encouragement and gossip…
Out of the same mouth come blessings and bitterness…
Out of the same mouth come hymns of heaven and threats of hell…

And it’s not just our mouths, anymore. I see (and have seen it in my own feeds) posts on social media that make me wonder if the person posting is aware of what they posted just minutes or hours before–rants and boasts, complaints and smug condemnation sprinkled with Bible verses about Peace and Love, and pictures of puppies. We copy and paste, write and speak “in the moment” out of the emotions and thoughts that we allow to govern us. And while we may forget our momentary outbursts and random sarcastic comments, others do not. God does not ignore them, either. He can and will forgive them, but He isn’t “fooled” by our gracious cover-ups and flowery quote boxes.

Especially in this election season, it is tempting to let emotions and “righteous” indignation cause us to speak or post in ways that show disrespect, disdain, and even hatred toward neighbors, co-workers, and (yes, possibly) relatives who may vote differently or for different reasons than we do. We hurry to post or “share” clever put-downs or preachy thoughts about what others should “know” or how they should think and act. But would we say such things in person? Do we really mean to hurt others in our quest to be “right” or clever or morally virtuous in the eyes of a few people we barely know?

When I pray today, I need to “listen” to what I’ve been saying lately. Do I need to deal with hidden anger or resentment? Do I need to confess (both to God and to someone else) about gossip? Do I need to reconsider the way I speak about my relationships and my achievements (and failures!)? Do I need to stop following or sharing certain sites or content? Do I need to spend less time talking and posting than listening and praying?

The same mouth that praises God should be speaking life, peace, healing, and hope to those around me. The same mouth that promises to follow Christ, should promise to reach out to those for whom He died. The same mouth that gives thanks for Salvation should be eager to share the Good News.

The tongue is powerful–whether as a weapon or a tool; whether controlled or out of control. God wants to teach us to use it as a tool for good. Not just when we pray, or worship, but every time we use it!

Anywhere…

Anywhere! Anywhere!
Fear I cannot know;
Anywhere with Jesus I can safely go!

I was reading in the Psalms the other day, and I fell on one of my favorites, Psalm 139:

 O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
    you discern my thoughts from afar.
You search out my path and my lying down
    and are acquainted with all my ways.
Even before a word is on my tongue,
    behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
You hem me in, behind and before,
    and lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
    it is high; I cannot attain it.

Where shall I go from your Spirit?
    Or where shall I flee from your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
    If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!
If I take the wings of the morning
    and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
10 even there your hand shall lead me,
    and your right hand shall hold me.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
    and the light about me be night,”
12 even the darkness is not dark to you;
    the night is bright as the day,
    for darkness is as light with you.

Psalm 139: 1-12 (ESV)

This portion of the Psalm speaks of God’s Omnipresence. But often, when I read it, I read it from a negative viewpoint. It speaks of hiding from the Lord…it is impossible to escape the Lord’s presence and His omnipotence. I cannot hide my thoughts or deeds or feelings from God’s all-seeing, all-knowing presence. And this is a good thing in the end. But what about when I am not trying to escape from God, but some other threat– guilt, pain, heartbreak, or even death?

God’s omnipresence is also a metaphysical reality in a very positive sense. I cannot stray outside of God’s presence. He will not remove it from me; He will not hide from me. He will never send me into ANY situation where He is NOT already there, and where He will NOT be with me.

I know this. But I needed a reminder today. God will be with me on my best days, and on my worst. He will be with me in sickness or depression, or celebration and strength. He will be with me whether I am “alone” or surrounded by strangers. He will be with me in the darkness where I can’t see anything, as well as in the blinding bright lights of an operating room, or the eerie haze of a foggy morning.

Wherever I am, God is figuratively holding my hand; He is hemming me in all around. I am protected and supported by His Almighty Right Hand. When I am tempted to doubt– He is there! When I am distracted by the din of other voices– He is there! When I have turned my back on Him– He is STILL there; waiting for me to turn back!

I don’t know where I will have to go today. It may be to the grocery store; it may be halfway across the world…I may be called to do unexpected things, to go in an unexpected direction, to turn a frightening corner or face an unknown foe. But I can go anywhere with confidence– not in MY wisdom or abilities or strength– God is WITH me. God goes BEFORE me and BEHIND me. God is OVER me and UNDER me, and all AROUND me.

Recently, there was a news story about a submarine with passengers who were going to visit the wreck of the Titanic. Tragically, the submarine failed and their lives were lost. Just like the passengers over 100 years earlier, they were far from any human help. But God was there. I don’t know if any of the passengers were believers, but if they were, they could face their last earthly hours in confidence and peace that passes human understanding– God was there. Even though their bodies were not saved from this tragedy, their spirits were never out of God’s reach; their hearts were never lost to God’s loving gaze.

May we rest in that assurance today. There is no place on Earth– or in or over or under the Earth!– where God does not watch over us. The going may not be pleasant. It may be dangerous or even deadly. But we– our soul; our spirit– can go anywhere without fear. We can face the transition from life to death with calm assurance. We can face the empty threats of Death and the Grave without flinching. We can face our fears, and defeat them, when we trust that God’s presence in constant and completely sufficient.

Praying With Confidence

I had a surprise last week. Something I had prayed for– arrived early! Why was I shocked? Hadn’t I prayed about this very thing? Did I think God was too busy to hear my prayer? Or not powerful enough to answer?

Sometimes, when we pray for things, we have a high expectation that God will answer our prayers exactly as we wish. But other times, we pray hesitantly, as though we are asking too much, or asking for the wrong thing. You see, I wanted a certain book order to be delivered in time for us to take the books to a Ham-fest, where we could resell them. But I had waited to order them until nearly the last minute. So my prayers were made with the fear that God’s will might not align with my own. I was surprised and delighted when the books came a day earlier than I expected!

Not only was I surprised by the early arrival of the books, I was surprised to realize that I had been praying without the confidence that God would answer. I knew He COULD answer my prayer. But I wasn’t sure that He SHOULD answer my prayer. After all, if only I had ordered sooner, I should have expected the books to come in time. I didn’t “deserve” to have God answer the prayer above and beyond my expectation…

And this is a horrible way to think. God doesn’t give us what we “deserve.” And, to be clear, He won’t give us what goes AGAINST His will. If I were to steal books in order to resell them, that would NOT be an answer to prayer. But God WANTS to bless us! His ways are not our ways, so sometimes, He “blesses” us in ways we don’t see or understand. But God is a good, good Father.

We don’t have to pray in fear. We don’t have to worry that we are asking for “too much.” We can pray in confidence– even knowing that God may not answer in the way we hope or expect. And we shouldn’t be surprised when God answers in good, and even miraculous ways that go beyond our hopes and expectations!.

“Father, thank you for being so Good and so Faithful in answering prayer. Whether little concerns or big problems, I can trust You to do what is best and to meet my needs. Help me to trust you even more in every area of my life.”

Do I Serve or “Deserve?”

It struck me just the other day how similar these two words are in English. To serve is to work for; to perform a duty; to labor on behalf of someone else. A servant performs duties for a master; a worker serves his or her employer; I serve my customers as they visit my shop. To “deserve” is to work in such a way, or to show such qualities as to merit reward (or punishment).

Much of our Christian life here on earth is centered around service. I serve at church; “I serve a risen Savior;” even this blog is a way of serving– sharing the Gospel and what I continue to learn about prayer. Praying for others is a way of serving them.

But much of our culture centers around what we “deserve.” Even our service is often qualified and judged as being more or less worthy than other service. If I serve on a board of directors, it is considered more worthy, more deserving of respect, than if I serve as a janitor, a junior clerk, or a night watchman. If I serve in a public capacity as an elected official or an ambassador, I am considered more deserving than if I serve as a humble citizen. We see some positions as deserving of more money, more power, more respect, and more worth.

But that is NOT the way God sees our service. God gives good gifts, not because we “deserve” them, but because it is His nature to give. God sends the sunshine and the rain to everyone, regardless of whether they have “earned” a sunny day or “deserve” lovely flowers to grow in their garden. Similarly, when God allows for natural disasters, they affect both “good” and “bad” people in a region. Occasionally, God will show His divine favor by sparing a group, as He did with the Israelites in Egypt. The Egyptians were victims of ten plagues, while the Israelites, living in the land of Goshen, were spared. But that wasn’t because the Israelites “deserved” to be spared, nor that every Egyptian was “deserving” of punishment. Rather, the horror of slavery and oppression of the Israelites caused God to show His righteousness and His power to save those who were being unjustly treated. (A lesson our world has yet to fully learn!) And God promised Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob that He would be with their descendants forever, saving them from those who would oppress them. But in daily life around us, innocent people often struggle, while “bad” people seem to prosper. Why doesn’t God give us what we “deserve?”

What we “deserve” in this life is the consequence of our sin and rebellion against God’s holiness–and that is DEATH. A God without any mercy would simply allow for those consequences to take effect without any opportunity to repent or to experience His Blessing. God does NOT give us what we “deserve” here on earth. However, He notices our “service”– our desire and capacity to do good–at every level. He does not give higher value to those who serve in positions of power or authority– in fact, Jesus taught just the opposite:

25 But Jesus called them to him and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. 26 It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant,27 and whoever would be first among you must be your slave,  28 even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:25-28 ESV

Prayer often seems like a humble service– we often pray alone or in small groups. Very few people are praised for being “prayer warriors,” and many pray without anyone even knowing about it. Except God knows. He hears and He delights in our prayers. We don’t pray in order to “earn” God’s favor, or anyone else’s approval. But we pray to a God who gives us far more than we “deserve.” And we serve a God who delights in even the humble acts we do for others. A God who has promised us Eternal life with Him in Heaven! Not as a reward for our service; not based on our worthiness or self-righteousness, but based on the worthiness of Jesus! Heaven is our reward for His great sacrifice. We don’t “deserve” it, but we can rejoice in it, even as we serve quietly and humbly here on earth.

Praying in the Dark

(This post is an updated version of one that first appeared three years ago, during the COVID pandemic. I have updated a few of the references to reflect the change. There is still a lot of darkness and confusion in the world, but some of the sources have changed a bit.)

The past few days have been a dark place for me. I don’t mean that something horrible has happened, or that my life has been upended. But things seem dim and indistinct. Some things I took for granted turn out to be less than sure. Events have been chaotic and tinged with evil and sadness. The present economy seems far from certain, and rumors swirl around the upcoming elections. Many places around the world are at war, and there is violence, unrest, crime, and uncertainty nearly everywhere. Even traditionally “safe” institutions like the family and the Church are under constant attack. It is difficult to know who or what to trust– everything seems shadowed and indistinct.

I read a novel a while ago, set in the early days of World War II in London. Because of the threat of air raids from Germany, the people were required to “black out” their windows at night, and drive with no headlights. People who had driven or walked around the streets of London with confidence just weeks before were being injured or even killed because they could no longer trust the once familiar streets. Craters and rubble from bombing raids, or hastily built ditches and barricades; hidden dangers filled neighborhoods. And people could not count on streetlights, headlights, or lights in windows to guide them safely home. At the same time, thousands of people, fearing that the Germans would use deadly gas, were carrying around gas masks (just in case!), and leaving them on buses or at pubs or train stations, because they were unused to the extra responsibility. Suddenly, the gas mask they were depending on was lost, and all the extra preparation turned out to be useless, anyway.

It reminds me how often I would see people just a couple of years ago, getting ready to enter a store, only to return to their car for their required mask. Many people wore them “the wrong way:” others wore them for months longer than necessary. Still others wore the same mask for several days but failed to wash their hands. Some people stayed in their homes for weeks, even when they could have spent some time getting fresh air at a park or one their porch or stoop. Others took great risks going to stores where other customers were sick. And many workers had no choice but to report to work, knowing they would be exposed to COVID. Many people refused to get the vaccines once they became available, while others were demanding that everyone had to get the vaccine or be charged with a crime. No one was sure if they were “safe”– even with masks, vaccines, and other protocols. It was a very dark time.

Hard times and difficult situations can cause us to shift our focus and have to learn new routines–even new vocabulary! At certain times, life almost seems “normal.” At others, we seem to be tossed by every new wave that comes along. It can be easy to lose one’s way in the fog and darkness of chaos and changing times.

The Psalmist and King, David, had words of wisdom for times like these: “Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.” (Psalm 119: 105 KJV)

Even when things seem dark and it feels like I’ve lost my way, God is right beside me. If I have no other “light” to see by, God’s word will be enough to guide me on. When I pray– even in the dark–God sees me clearly, and knows the way ahead.

Photo by Pat Whelen on Pexels.com

And I needed to be reminded of that again this week.

Our Advocate

I write often about praying for others. I sometime write about others praying. But I don’t often write about Jesus praying– except during His ministry on Earth. But Jesus continues to pray–without ceasing– for us in Heaven. (See Hebrews 7:25 and Romans 8:24). The Bible tells us that Christ is seated at the right hand of the Father and making intercession for us. Not only is He praying; He is praying FOR US.

Jesus didn’t just die to keep us out of Heaven and then move on and leave us to struggle on our own. Nor did He send the Holy Spirit to live with us so that He could sit down and do nothing. Jesus is still passionately advocating on your behalf– every minute!

And that is a great comfort in a world where we sometimes feel abandoned and friendless. Even if the whole world is lined up to do me great harm, Jesus is on my side. If you have trusted Him with your life, He is faithful to advocate for you– for your growth as a Christian; for your protection from the schemes of the Enemy; for abundant and productive LIFE for you, both now and through Eternity.

If you have not trusted Jesus as your LORD and Savior, He is still advocating– for another opportunity, for more time, for circumstances (good or bad) to help you seek (and FIND!) Him. For those who have not heard the Gospel, He is pleading with the Father (and sending the Spirit to urge believers) to open their eyes, ears, and hearts to God’s will and trust Him.

Jesus advocates on our behalf because of His great Love and Compassion. We don’t deserve to have someone else plead our case before the Righteous Throne of God. And we are not qualified to plead our own case– we are guilty in the sight of a perfectly Holy God.

“But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life. More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” Hebrews 5:8-11 ESV

You will never, NEVER pray alone! And who better to have as a prayer partner than the very Son of God Himself! He is our Savior, our Champion, and our Advocate!

Where Grief Meets Hope

We lost a family member a couple of weeks ago. We were shocked and heartbroken to hear of his loss. To know that we will never get to hear his laughter or watch his eyes crinkle up over a good joke; never hear him enthuse over history or a great movie; never enjoy the fellowship of being in the same room together again. He never got to retire from his job; never got to walk his daughters down the aisle; never got to enjoy the house he and my sister-in-law planned to build.

BUT

Chris had a wonderful life in many ways. He and his wife have three amazing adult children. He got to enjoy plenty of days loving nature and enjoying a good sunset over Lake Michigan. He harvested many morels each spring. He made music. He helped hundreds of people in hundreds of little ways. He was blessed.

We went to Chris’s funeral last weekend. We helped celebrate his life– his accomplishments and achievements, his vivid personality, his sense of humor– and we celebrated his Faith. Yes, there were tears at the funeral. We will miss Chris in the years to come. But we share his faith and his great hope. We will miss him temporarily. We will grieve for a few years. And then, we will experience a joy that will make us forget the grief! Not only will we see Chris again– to laugh together and share stories and songs– we will be in the presence of our source of Life, and Hope, Joy and Peace! We will be surrounded by the great cloud of witnesses as we live eternally with the One who loves us best!

Many years ago, another man died. There was grief, stunned disbelief, and terror. The family, friends, and followers of Jesus Christ mourned. They hid. Their world was dark with despair and anguish. All these years later, we look at paintings and sculptures of Jesus suffering on the cross. But, while we shudder at the horror of all He suffered, we do not look on such pictures with fear or despair. The Cross is not a symbol of Death’s ultimate victory, but rather its ultimate defeat. Jesus didn’t stay dead. His body was buried, but He did not stay there. We celebrate, not the horrors of the Cross, but the limits of its power to steal our joy.

This is where grief meets hope. It is where the past is overwhelmed by the promise of Eternity. Christians grieve– of course we do. We love life, and we grieve to see it end. We love being with friends and family– we feel an emptiness and an ache when someone we love is “missing.” But we do NOT grieve without hope. We acknowledge the brief sting of loss. But Death loses its sting in the light of Christ’s victory. There is no lasting victory in the grave. Our time is short; we are powerless to stop death from taking us; from taking our loved ones. But Eternity beckons! Even our time on earth gives us daily reminders– the sun rises each morning; spring comes after each winter; children grow into parents, and we get to love another generation.

Even when life is hard; when grief looms large and hope seems dim– hope does not disappoint! Because Christ LIVES!

Chris was buried earlier this week– his body was buried– but he LIVES. He is healed and freed of all the pains and frustrations of this earthly life, and because of Christ’s gift of Grace and Redemption, Chris is living all that he once hoped for. Because of Christ’s great gift, many of us will someday join him in singing God’s praises, in laughter, delight, and endless joy!

“I Don’t Want Your Prayers!”

Have you ever offered to pray for someone– maybe they’re going through a Cancer journey or they’ve just lost their job– and they reacted with anger and indignation? I have; and it’s a very uncomfortable feeling.

Often, they may say they don’t need prayer; they don’t believe in God, therefore, they don’t believe that prayer has any power or effect. Sometimes, they feel that prayer is only for those who “can’t make it on their own,” or for those who are weak and needy– and they don’t wish to think of themselves (or to be thought of) in that way. Some people even fear prayer– that they will get their hopes up, only to have them dashed when God doesn’t give them the answer they expect or hope for.

But sometimes, they are angry– not so much at you or me, but at God. Even those who say He doesn’t exist often subconsciously “blame” Him when things go wrong. Others believe that God exists only to punish them or to make their lives miserable. They hate God and they hate anything to do with Him, including prayer. And some people have been hurt by other Christians– those who use their own perceived righteousness as a weapon. Their offer, “I’ll PRAY for you.” rings hollow, smug, and superior. Such experiences can leave such a bad impression that all offers of prayer sound ugly to them.

It is natural to be upset or hurt when someone refuses offered prayer. It can be tempting to respond by granting their wish– “Ok, I won’t pray for you!” But remember the following:

  • God doesn’t listen to our prayers based on someone else’s wishes or their attitude. God listens to OUR heart. If you feel compassion, and want to pray, and you DON’T do it, you are letting another person quench your spirit-driven desire.
  • God loves everyone. It is not His desire that anyone perish, or that they suffer needlessly. And if they won’t pray for themselves, that doesn’t mean that God can’t or won’t intervene. Don’t let their unbelief determine your level of trust!
  • “A soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1 ESV) Don’t match anger for anger or resentment for resentment. Hurting people hurt other people– they lash out from a place of pain. A gentle response from you may not quell their anger, but it WILL keep from adding fuel to the fire!
  • It is not our job to change people’s minds and hearts– it is our job to be witnesses of God’s love for them. Don’t withdraw your offer of prayer, but likewise don’t pummel someone else over the head with it. Simply express your empathy and your desire for their healing, or for their situation to improve, and your willingness to pray as part of that.
  • Remember that we are commanded to pray for others– it is not a suggestion. Nor is it a “strategy” meant to disarm, charm, or convict others into submission. Pray for their salvation, certainly, but don’t pray for that without also praying for their situational needs.

I know of numerous examples of people who have been led to Christ because of the faithful prayers of family or friends–even when they were in rebellion against God and angry with the Christians in their lives. That doesn’t mean that you will see immediate results– God’s timing is not ours; we may never see the results of our prayers in ways we recognize. But prayer IS powerful. Perhaps that is why so many people are afraid of it. It is beyond our power to predict; beyond our power to control; beyond our power to understand.

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