I Don’t Care What You Know..

There is a saying: “I don’t care what you know, until I know that you care.” I went to the bank yesterday, and there was a line. There were only two tellers available (other bank workers were dealing with larger issues in their offices, so there was no back-up, either). Both drive-thru windows had lines, as well. This is a small bank, but a recent closure of a nearby branch means that it is now busier than before, with the same amount of staffing.

The woman ahead of me in line was impatient and angry. She kept repeating the obvious– “They need more tellers! There aren’t enough tellers!” She was rude and demanding, and when she finally got to the front, and a teller (harassed and overworked) patiently and politely asked how she could help, the customer repeated, “You need more tellers here!” The teller explained that corporate policy allows only so many workers per shift, and they were all busy. It was the first of the month– one of their busiest days for cashing checks and dealing with monthly payments. The customer, somewhat abashed, apologized for her rudeness.

The customer “knew” that she would have been served faster if there were more tellers at the front. She knew how SHE would like to have the bank policy play out in her favor. But she didn’t really know the whole story. Her snap judgment wasn’t based on complete knowledge, but on emotion and assumption.

Earlier this week, I was praying about a woman I know slightly. I had heard that she was in a bad housing situation. Her house needed major repairs, and she could not afford them. I prayed that God would act, providing her with “better living conditions.” I assumed that God might provide for her to get a new roof or water heater, or pay down some of her bills. The next day, I heard that her house burned down!

What should I make of God’s response to my prayer? Did He not hear me? Doesn’t God care? Is He laughing at this woman’s misfortune? Is He laughing at my feeble and vague prayer request? Someone reading just the details I have provided (my prayer, and the incident of the fire) might decide they “know” that God is malicious or that He simply doesn’t exist or answer prayer. But are they correct in that conclusion?

NO! God cares. He cares deeply. I was moved out of concern to pray for a woman I barely know. Many others have been praying for her for several weeks, as well as offering her counsel and help in trying to find alternative housing or financial assistance. I don’t know the true extent of her needs– not just housing, but her spiritual, emotional, and other physical needs. God does! We tend to put our hope and trust in our circumstances– even desperate ones– and our ability to control, manipulate, or just survive them. This house had been a burden for a long time, yet the woman steadfastly endured high bills, bad roofing, and poor conditions.

God IS answering my prayer– and the prayers of many others– as help is pouring in for this woman. She was uninjured in the fire, and she has a temporary place to stay. Furthermore, she has people helping her plan ahead for permanent housing, financial needs she will have in the next few weeks and months, and making sure she does not have to face this tragedy alone.

Sometimes, God’s blessings are wrapped in sorrows. Sometimes, we must endure waiting, hardship, and even loss in order to experience growth and peace. Sometimes, we have to deal with impatient customers, long lines, or personal tragedy. God KNOWS. He doesn’t just know our present circumstances and pain. He knows the final outcome, and all that He wants to accomplish THROUGH our present circumstances. And God CARES. He cared about the angry customer in front of me at the bank. He cared about the overworked teller waiting on us. He cared about the woman who lost her house. He cares about each one– no matter what circumstances may suggest. He does not leave us alone in our trials– even when it may feel like He has abandoned us. There are people somewhere in the world praying for you right now. They don’t know what will happen to you today or tomorrow, but they know that God is sovereign. And the Holy Spirit prompts them to pray, even when they don’t know, for God to bless you, protect you, and watch over you.

Two things I have taken away from my experiences the other day: First– God is ALWAYS Trustworthy! I said a quick prayer for the harassed teller and her customer as I waited in line (it’s not like I didn’t have any time to pray!) And sure enough, as she waited on the woman and then on me, the lines at the drive thru windows melted away. She was able to take time to explain her situation to the customer ahead of me, and she was able to take her time waiting on us both. She kept her temper in check and managed to smile through the transactions! And her calm response helped the customer realize her rudeness and apologize. I don’t think that was just coincidence. And I don’t think it was coincidence that several people have been praying for weeks about the other woman’s housing situation. The fire wasn’t an answer to our prayers– our prayers were preparing for an answer to the fire!

The second reminder– Pray without ceasing (1Thessalonians 5:17). While my experience at the bank called for immediate prayer and found an immediate response, my other prayers have been going on for weeks and months. Nothing seemed to be happening. Yet God was preparing for an event I had no way of foreseeing. We want quick answers to prayer. We want easy answers to our prayers. But God’s ways are not our ways. His ways are mysterious to us, but they are for the best, not just the most convenient.

When we pray, God doesn’t care what we KNOW (or think we know). And He doesn’t always give us the knowledge we’re looking for. But He KNOWS! And He CARES! He honors the prayers we lift up because we know Him, and because we care about others.

August 2, 2024 0

May Day Mishaps

Today is the first of May– May Day. May Day has a long history, with pagan origins tied to the celebration of late spring or early summer. In many European nations, there would be dancing around a May Pole, or May bush, floral garlands, and floral bouquets offered at various shrines, including to the Virgin Mary. In some communities, girls vied to be crowned the “May Queen,” while stories were told of fairies. May Day was popular in the United States for many years around the turn of the 20th century– with parades, flower baskets, and more. It is less popular in modern times, and many of the floral parades and festive outings take place around Memorial Day, instead.

When I was a child in elementary school, we made paper “flowers” and a small paper coronet with a loop handle for May Day. I remember making daffodils, hyacinths, and tulips out of construction paper and other craft materials, and making the coronet “baskets” out of decorated paper cones. We glued or stapled the pieces together to take home. Then, we were encouraged to loop the handle over the door knob at the front door of our house when we got home, knock, and run and hide around the corner. Presumably, our mothers or babysitters would see the gift of flowers and wonder who could have left them there. It was a fun game to play, and a way to celebrate the season of wonderful spring flowers.

Unfortunately, when we did this in kindergarten, my flowers got trampled on the bus. It was a rainy day, and my flowers fell in the aisle, where a boy stepped on them with muddy sneakers. They were ruined. I cried and cried, and another boy on the bus gave me the flowers he had made. It was a thoughtful gesture– one I’ve never forgotten– but I remained desolate. I told my mother the whole sordid story, and she told me that, in her day, they had picked wildflowers, such as violets and even clovers, and tied them with a string to leave on someone’s porch. Then she took me outside, and we made a small bunch of violets with a couple of “Dutchman’s Breeches.” I didn’t get to surprise her, but we had such fun looking for wildflowers together.

I loved this game so much, I decided to go a step further the next year. We made paper “bouquets” at school, just like the previous year. Mine stayed clean and dry, and I hung it on the doorknob and mom pretended to be surprised. But later, I took one of our juice glasses from the cupboard, and picked a nice bunch of my mom’s live daffodils and hyacinths, a couple of her irises, and a tulip. I tried to arrange them in the juice glass, but it was too short and small to hold all the flowers I had picked. I left it on the porch, near the door, and knocked and hid, waiting to see my mom’s delight at her “surprise” bouquet. But instead of delight, I heard her wail– “Oh, no! My flowers!” The glass had tipped over, the flowers lay limply all over the porch, and the glass had rolled onto the ground. I thought I had made a wonderful surprise. Instead, I had made a mess. I had picked almost all of Mom’s best daffodils, and all of her pink hyacinths. I had trampled some of her other irises to get to the one I wanted. She only had a few tulips, and I had picked the only red one.

My intentions were good, but my execution was poor. And the result was disappointing and hurtful to us both. Mom didn’t realize I was right around the corner hearing her dismay, and I didn’t realize my “gift” would fall so flat.

It’s been over 50 years since my “May Day Mishap,” but there are some lessons I have never forgotten:

Picked flowers die! Mom wasn’t angry with me for wanting to pick flowers, but she knew that picked flowers would wilt and die. In later years, Mom loved receiving hanging flower baskets, and planters with live flowers. And we had many memories of planting live annuals in the front yard or at graves near Memorial Day– flowers that might take root and spread joy throughout the summer months. In the same way, there are so many “showy” projects that vie for our attention– projects that may seem urgent or offer quick rewards like status or money. We are tempted to “pick” projects that will make us look good or feel good in the moment. But the really important projects are those that have lasting impact, even if they don’t “show” as well. We are wise to invest in “little” things that have lasting impact over “big” but fleeting activities and investments.
When giving gifts, it really is the thought that counts! My mom was just as delighted by the “second-hand” flowers I got from my classmate as she was by the the ones I made the next year. Not because his were “better” than mine, but because they demonstrated that I had a good friend at school with a kind heart. My “mishap” gift came, in part, because I wanted to give a “better” gift, not because I wanted to delight my mom, but I wanted to impress her. My mom was a saver– she saved all my old school papers, old valentines, birthday cards, and more. And she saved letters from her friends and family– over eighty years of them! Not because the cards and letters themselves were so wonderful, but because each one came with good wishes. She had an entire farmhouse of good wishes and thoughtful memories when she passed away in 2023.
Relationships are more important and more valuable than resources. I loved looking for wildflowers with my Mom that year of kindergarten. It’s one of my favorite memories of May Day. And I still remember the kindness of my friend, Ken, whose heart has since led him to the mission field on more than one occasion. No May Day flowers will last over fifty years, but friendships and relationships can and do!
Forgiveness is sweeter than flowers. I was so astonished to think that my error in judgment had caused my mother pain– and yet, when she found me, she hugged me tight and gently offered both forgiveness and correction. She demonstrated exactly the way our Father loves us. So often, I want to come to God with a bouquet of praise, or a basket of good works, leave it before His Throne and run away and hide. But God isn’t impressed by my flowers or my grand gestures. He wants to spend time with ME. Every year, he sends fields of wild flowers; in every season of life He sends friends, helpers, and other blessings. And, more than anything, He wants to share all of it with me. Not because I deserve it, but because He is so full of love and forgiveness. He wants to remind me to “come home” to His gracious arms. He is not waiting to scold me, punish me, or make me feel small. He wants to hug me, and with patience and gentleness, He will offer His Love, and correction. No matter what “May Day Mishaps” I may have.

This May Day, I am encouraged by God’s faithfulness, His forgiveness, and the power of His love. I hope you are, too!

May 1, 2024 0

“Stoplight” Praying

Have you ever prayed at a stoplight? I don’t mean the kind of prayer where you ask God to turn the light green “NOW” or ask Him to please keep the yellow light from turning red as you speed through it… Have you ever used the time waiting at the stoplight to pray? Or time spent waiting in line at the bank? Waiting to pick up your kids from school? Waiting at the copier for a batch-print? Waiting for your number to be called at the license bureau?

Time is a commodity– a precious gift. And too often, we lament that there “isn’t enough time” for prayer in our lives. We may lead busy lives, filled with activity. But how much time do we spend waiting for “something else,” or “someone else,” to show up or happen or finish happening?

Instead of growing frustrated in these times of waiting, why not utilize our time by praying? The Apostle Paul urged believers to “¹⁶Rejoice always, ¹⁷pray without ceasing, ¹⁸give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.? (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). Paul and Silas never waited at a stoplight for any of their mission trips, but I’m sure they experienced “down” time in many of their travels. And what better time to pray than when you are stuck on a ship (or a commuter train, bus, taxi, etc.) ?

Of course, I don’t recommend praying with your eyes closed as you drive, but you can still pray. You can pray as you drive, bike, hike, shop, sit, or eat! You can pray from the doctor’s office, or the laundromat– anywhere you have to wait. You can pray silently, or out loud (as long as you’re not interrupting others). You can pray about “small” things or deep concerns. You can pray for 5 seconds or 20 minutes. Just Pray!

Just a couple of tips to help make this a habit:

Keep a running prayer list on your phone or device– or on a simple notepad– somewhere handy when you are traveling.
Have a daily focus for prayer, so when you are stopped, you already have a topic in mind; one that can be picked up as a thread throughout the day. (For more help with this, see my page on “Prayer Points.”) For example, on Mondays, I pray for family and friends; if I’m stuck in traffic, I can pray for one (or two) of them. If I’m waiting longer, I can pray for a whole family! If I’ve already prayed in the morning for the whole family, I can think about friends with whom I’ve lost touch!
Use your “stoplight” moments for praise– think of one to three things for which you are thankful; or “pray” a short chorus or a verse you have memorized.
Practice 1 Thessalonians 5:18, and thank God for your current circumstances. Are you at the dentist, waiting to get your tooth filled? Thank God you have teeth, and the means to keep them healthy! Are you picking up your daughter from softball practice? Thank God for her ability and interest in sports!

You might be amazed at how many opportunities God gives throughout each day to spend time with Him in prayer– and how quickly all that time “flies” as you are “just waiting” around!

April 10, 2024 1

Prayer in the Cyber Age

I attend a weekly prayer meeting at our church. A small group of us meets one morning a week to share prayer concerns, pray for our pastors and church workers, missionaries, community members in need, etc. It usually lasts just about an hour. On a “good day,” we have about seven people.

I grew up in a small rural area, and our little country church had a weekly Wednesday evening prayer service. On a “slow night,” we might have seven people. Sometimes, we had thirty or more (nearly half the church congregation)! They lasted about an hour and a half. When I was in college, we had groups that met once a week for prayer. It wasn’t always the same group, but it met at the same time, and, again, we sometimes had as many as thirty in attendance– for prayer. Often, we met in a dorm room, so it was cramped, and many of us were sitting or kneeling on the floor. Once, we had a fire drill, and my feet had “fallen asleep” and I had to be helped as we walked to the exit!

I don’t say this to disparage our current small group, but to point out some of the differences between life in the 1970s, 1980s and today. My current church has activities every Wednesday evening, and much larger attendance than the little country church ever attained. And prayer is still a small part of the Wednesday evening programming. Prayer is encouraged in small groups, individually, and we pray during service. But sustained time set aside for prayer– what the old hymn refers to as “Sweet Hour of Prayer”–in a group setting is becoming more of a rarity.

There are many reasons for it– some good, some not so good.

On the “good” side, it must be noted that corporate prayer today has expanded far beyond the traditional in-person prayer meeting. Prayer can be skyped, group-chatted, zoomed, and conference-called. Prayer can be “hosted” in one location, with satellite groups around the world praying in real time together. In such ways, thousands, and even millions of people can be joined in prayer. This is an amazing development!

And, along with such developments, prayer has become far more global, and far more immediate. I can receive a text or e-mail notifying me of a prayer request from nearly anywhere in the world, and know that I am joining with a host of other Christians when I stop and take a few moments to pray right then.

So what’s the “downside” of cyber prayer?

Speaking as one who has lived the experience of meeting with the same people at a dedicated time over many years specifically to pray, I have observed the following benefits:

In-person prayer meetings offer a more intimate time of fellowship, compassion, and service. I’m not just seeing other people on a screen, reading a text message, or even filling an auditorium seat as part of a huge “movement”– I’m sitting in a circle, breathing the same air, hearing the same hum of the furnace or fluorescent lights, the sound of others breathing, sighing, or even crying quietly around me. Sometimes, I’m holding another person’s hand, or giving them a hug. I am not just among fellow believers, I’m with family. We get to know one another in a deeper way. I know their families, their personal struggles and victories. I learn the rhythm of their prayers, and the issues closest to their hearts– and they know mine! And that can be a scary thing at first– building the kind of trust that intimate fellowship demands. But it pays off a thousand-fold!

In-person prayer meetings are also focused in a different way. Cyber prayer usually focuses on a specific need– sometimes an immediate, or even temporary issue. In-person prayer focuses on the long term discipline of praying. I have prayed with groups over years for lost relatives or unresolved health issues. And while that may seem depressing to read about, in practice it teaches patience, and deepens faith. As a group, we see God’s answers develop according to HIS timing and HIS plan. Sometimes, we see issues resolved quickly; other times, we see how God strengthens us in our trials; and still other times we see God do surprising and miraculous things just as we’ve almost given up hope. And there are some answers we may never “see.” But, primarily, we are not praying for an outcome– we are praying as a pursuit of Christian living; developing a life of prayer, faith, and obedience. We spend much of our time in prayer lifting up requests, but we also spend much of our time in praise, worship, adoration, confession, and thanksgiving– because prayer is a holistic pursuit.

Which brings me to another benefit, one that may not seem obvious at first. Meeting consistently and weekly for prayer is a habit. It builds a character of faithfulness and true compassion like very little else I’ve encountered. God can “show up” wherever two or three are gathered (see Matthew 18:20), and because God is beyond time and space, He can be present in a church meeting room, in cyberspace, or in outer space! But we are temporal. We have to learn patience, hope, and faithfulness. We learn to be trustworthy of the feelings and confidences of others by sharing our hearts. We learn to serve by the practice of serving those around us over an extended period of time. We learn patience by waiting on the Lord, stopping our busy, deadline-driven, goal-oriented lifestyle to make time for the development of our faith.

Finally, in a post-COVID society, sustained, regular, corporate prayer is also sustained, regular, corporate fellowship. We live in an increasingly isolated society. With more people on the earth than ever before, we are more lonely, depressed, anxious, and self-absorbed than ever before. Even in Church! Many people attend service regularly, but still feel unconnected and uninvolved. And others get “involved” in every activity, often burning themselves out trying to “outdo” themselves (or others). Activities that promise fellowship can sometimes fall “flat” in the face of social expectations. We attend, hoping to “get something” out of an experience. We want to be entertained, challenged, encouraged, uplifted, etc. But often, our expectations are not met. We don’t feel included, or we feel overwhelmed. We imagine we are being compared to others (or we do the comparing!), and feel that we fall short. We don’t know enough, do enough, are not “enough.” And we give up. We give up on the church, on other Christians, on God.

Committing to attend a weekly prayer meeting pulls us “out of ourselves.” We learn to pray for the needs of others. We learn to share our own needs and allow others to pray for us. We learn to be transparent and authentic. We learn to forgive.

Prayer is amazing– in any form. Communicating with the God of the Universe is an unspeakably miraculous opportunity, made possible BY God, THROUGH God, for OUR benefit. Prayer in the cyber age is diverse, global, immediate, and effective. But let’s consider the blessing of old-fashioned Prayer Meetings, and not forsake the practice of meeting together (see Hebrews 10:25) , in person, with no other goal than to spend a sweet hour in prayer!

April 5, 2024 0

Fixing the Snarls

A few years ago, I got really ambitious and decided I would take up crocheting. My grandmother taught me the basics many years ago, and I thought I would be able to pick it back up and make delightful scarves and mittens and maybe even afghans… Except, when I started a scarf, I ended up with a nice start attached to a horribly snarled up ball of yarn. No problem. I would simply work at the snarl until it melted away, and continue with my scarf. Except it didn’t melt away. I was able to “move” the snarl a foot or so down from where it was, but I couldn’t work it all the way out.

I struggled with that snarl far longer than I should have, and eventually gave up the project and moved on to making candles (another story for another time). But I learned a painful lesson. I would love to say that I prayed about the snarl and God unraveled it for me, but that didn’t happen. I prayed– yes; but God allowed me to continue in my stubbornness and self-confidence to do battle with a few yards of green yarn for days, when I could have been doing more productive things.

I have a great need to try to “fix” things– I think most of us do at some level. We live in a broken world, and we know that there are things that are “snarled” all around us–relationships, situations, circumstances–that need fixing. And God has given us opportunities to do good works that can make the world around us better. But it is not our job to “fix” the brokenness in the world. Only God can really “fix” it–even though He may give us work to do along the way.

And that brings me back to prayer. No, God didn’t “fix” the snarl in my yarn. And He didn’t “fix” my stubborn attitude or my willingness to finish the project another way or ask for help from someone else. God isn’t interested in making our lives (or our projects) easier for us by removing our problems. And God isn’t impressed by our stubborn efforts to “fix” the situations in our lives. God’s ways are not our ways (see Isaiah 55:8-9; and check out https://blackaby.org/gods-ways-are-not-our-ways/.

So many times, we think of prayer as a last resort, as a crutch to fall back on when our efforts seem to be failing, or when we think a situation is “too big” for us to handle on our own. Even in the things of Christ, we tend to plan first, and pray later. Prayer becomes our Plan B. But what if, in the grand scale, prayer was always our Plan A? What if we started the morning, not looking at our planners and calendars, but listening for God’s direction? Even if it meant scrapping our own plans and leaving the “snarls” to God? What if, as our churches planned for programming and outreach, we resolved to do nothing until we had prayed for a month about our goals for the coming year? What if our churches had more people coming to prayer meetings than coming to Family Game Nights or Teen Overnight Parties? In my own life, what if I spent less time writing in my prayer journal than actually asking God to inhabit my prayers?

In the book of 1 Samuel, King Saul undertook a mission for God– God had chosen him to be King over all Israel, and to lead the nation against the wicked peoples in their midst. Saul led his warriors in battle, and even had success, but God rejected Saul because of his disobedience. Saul wanted victory to confirm his status as a warrior and a king. He listened to God’s instructions– superficially. He even insisted that he had followed God’s instructions– after all, he defeated the enemy! But he didn’t do it God’s way or for God’s glory. God gave him victory in many battles, but Saul was impatient, imprudent, and impudent. Saul ended his reign in shameful defeat because he wanted to “fix the snarls”– his way.

I’m not saying that my prayer blog and prayer journal are wrong, or that churches shouldn’t do programming– not at all. But it is something to think about, before the next yarn snarl comes along… Am I busy trying to “fix” a situation that I can’t (or shouldn’t) fix, when I should be watching for God’s next assignment? Am I trying to win a battle to prove myself worthy, or am I letting God set the terms and take the Glory that is rightfully His? Am I busy asking God to unsnarl yarn, when He wants to move mountains?

February 26, 2024 0

So Close…

I’ve been reading in the book of Numbers this week. Numbers is not the most exciting book of the Bible. Many of the chapters are about the census, or about further rules and regulations concerning sacrificial offerings, etc.. But the chapters from 11-15 detail a series of rebellions– grumblings against Moses and efforts to return to Egypt. These rebellions happen after over two years after God had led the people out of Egypt. For two years, they have been protected, fed, sustained, and instructed by God himself. His spirit has appeared as a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night throughout their journey. They have had manna and quail to eat, water from the rock to drink, and they have seen the vast army of Egypt drowned in a matter of minutes, while they were led through the sea on dry land!

And now, they are so close to the “finish line.” They are on the very doorstep of the land of Canaan; the land God had promised to GIVE them. All that is left is for Moses to send out some scouts to bring back a report about the land– its cities and farmland, its people and its produce. Those two years must have seemed like a lifetime, but now it would be coming to an end. God would provide a homeland; a place to build houses, raise crops, rear their children, and settle into lives of peace and prosperity.

So what happened? The scouts brought back a factual report. The land had fortified cities, and lush farmland. It was already planted with plenty of fruit trees and vineyards. And there were ancient people groups with mighty warriors. Israel had just taken a census. They also had mighty warriors, and a lot of them! Moreover, they had God’s promise that the land would be GIVEN to them as their inheritance.

They were so close! Victory, rest, and prosperity were so close they should have been able to taste them. Instead, their warriors moaned and wailed like infants. The same people who had vowed to follow the Lord at Mount Sinai, now planned to walk away from His promised prize. They decided to turn around and go back to slavery in Egypt–the same Egypt that God had decimated two years earlier by sending plagues and destroying its army.

Two years of camping and living “on the road,” lost in two hours of grumbling and fear-mongering. And the punishment? Forty years of needless wandering–time to realize what had been thrown away in petty worrying and imagining the worst. Time to regret their reaction and their failure to trust God. Time for God to show them, once again, His ability to keep them safe and sound in the desert places.

And the learning curve would be a steep one. Almost immediately, a group decided that they would “prove” to God that they were ready to conquer Canaan– on their own. But it didn’t work. Then a group decided that Moses was to blame for their misfortune. But they were “swallowed up.” In the forty extra years of wandering, group after group would challenge Moses (and God) and be destroyed from within. Moses, who had already lived forty years in the wilderness tending sheep, would have to repeat the task, shepherding the entire nation of Israel for forty long and difficult years. And even he would fall victim to his own frustrations, calling water from another rock, but doing it “his” way. Even Moses would fall in the wilderness, never getting to enter the promised land.

How many times have you noticed that the closer we get to a goal, the more likely we are to fall short. We sabotage our own efforts, or we rebel against good instruction. Sometimes we just give up a few yards short of the finish. We are just over half-way through the month of February. What goals or resolutions did you make for this year? How many of them have you stuck with?

Here are three things I take away from the lessons of Numbers 11-15:

Look Beyond. Don’t take your eyes off the prize! The scouts’ report was not all bad. Yes, the cities were walled and the warriors were big and fierce. But the walls of Jericho were eventually brought down without a single battering ram, siege ramp, or arrow! Don’t ignore the trials ahead, but don’t let them blind you to the blessings beyond them!
Look ahead, not behind. Don’t waste time living in past comforts or running from past mistakes. God has something better than whatever we’re going through now. But God isn’t waiting on the other side. He is beside us, around us, WITH us right now. He is patient with us. It may take us two years (or forty-two!) to reach a goal, but if we learn to follow God, we will never be forsaken.
Look UP! God’s spirit didn’t appear on the ground around the Israelite camp. He appeared as a pillar. God called Moses UP on Mount Sinai. We need to stop looking back at our past, or around, comparing ourselves to others, and look at God’s promises. In relation to our goals and dreams, we need to LIFT them up in prayer! Daily!

We are so close! Let’s keep going in the right direction towards God’s promises.

February 16, 2024 0

Jesus Wept

It is the shortest verse in the entire Bible– St. John 11:35: “Jesus wept.” Only two words. They are easily memorized; they are also easily overlooked or misrepresented. Jesus wept over the death of his good friend Lazarus.

Read the story of Lazarus here.

Jesus wept–Emmanuel felt deep emotion and showed it. God shed tears over the pain and sadness of a death; Messiah cried for the loss of his good friend. Jesus was no stranger to sadness and loss– God understands the sharp sting of death. God is compassionate, not heartless or cruel. If we are in emotional turmoil, it is not because God doesn’t know our pain or doesn’t care. He hurts WITH us in our times of deepest need.

girl in pink jacket on wooden bridge in the forest

Jesus wept–People often ask the rhetorical question, “What would Jesus do?” when faced with a situation. Here is an example of what Jesus did– he wept. Sometimes, the “thing to do” is to acknowledge the reality of our situation–death hurts. It brings out feelings of anger and even fear. Death is scary. It’s ugly, and it fills us with a sense of injustice, and a desire to wake up and find that death is just a very bad dream. Aching loss, wracking sobs, feeling punched in the gut by circumstances– these are valid feelings and reactions. To pretend otherwise or to deny ourselves or others the right to express those feelings does great harm, just as wallowing in sadness and remaining isolated in our grief can drag us into hopeless depression.

Jesus wept– period. He didn’t punch a wall or point fingers at Mary and Martha for “letting” their brother die. He didn’t try to justify his extra-long stay that kept him from arriving before his friend died. Neither did he justify returning to a region where he was not “safe” from the authorities in order to comfort the sisters (and ultimately raise Lazarus back to life). People often criticize Christians for “not doing enough” to erase hunger, cure diseases, or end poverty in the world. Some even point out that Jesus, being God incarnate, had the power to do all of this during his earthly ministry. But he didn’t. As he was dying, he said, “It is finished.” He wasn’t referring to some social revolution or economic program, or political movement that would abolish the oppression of the Roman Empire, or the corruption of the Pharisees, or end the slave trade. That doesn’t mean that God approves of evil, corruption, and injustice.

But it means that Jesus’s mission was accomplished through what he did in life and through his sacrificial death. He loved freely, healed those who were willing, and taught about the true character of his Heavenly Father. He ate, and laughed, and slept; he burped and sweat, and cried. He prayed and worshiped and worked and gave. Jesus didn’t weep because he had no power to keep Lazarus from dying. He proved that just minutes later.

Jesus wept because he was showing us the very heart of God. God’s heart is not to flex his sovereign muscles and demand our instant and abject obedience– though he has the perfect authority and right to do so. His heart is to walk intimately with us, even when that walk goes through the very valley of the shadow of death! God’s love isn’t flinty and cold. It isn’t pushy and arrogant and selfish. It is extravagant and gracious beyond all imagination. It is raw agony and pure joy. It doesn’t immediately “fix” our hurts or answer all our questions, but it wraps around us even IN our pain, and it give us hope to endure and carry on.

man hugging a woman wearing black tank top

What in your life causes you to weep? What burdens and aches and frustrations and questions drive you to tears? Jesus may not take away what hurts us, but he will never turn us away because we are scarred or scared or broken. He will share our burdens, wipe our eyes, and hold us as we pour out our tears.

November 8, 2023 0

Driven to Pray?

I met up with an old schoolmate last week, and he asked a question that made me think a lot. He wondered whether our generation– specifically our classmates and friends, were “driven.” His observation was that many of his nieces and nephews seem to have a lot of drive and ambition that he doesn’t remember seeing (or experiencing) in our youth. He noted that few of our friends have gone on to become lawyers or doctors, engineers or CEOs.

I wasn’t sure how to answer his observation. I started, but didn’t complete, a master’s degree. I know several of our friends who are teachers, paralegals, and business owners. Many have what most people would consider at least moderately “successful” lives– happy families, rewarding careers, the respect of others in their communities. And yet very few have distinguished themselves on the national or international front– aside, perhaps, from him! He is a tenured professor, with several published books, and has studied and/or taught at several universities around the world. If HE can’t remember being driven or ambitious, how does he explain his own “success?”

But the observation struck a nerve with me on a personal level. I know that many of my former classmates and long-time friends may find it odd that I have “settled” for the life I live. I own a business, but it is a modest one. I have taught and worked in libraries, but I could have chosen to become a professor or administrator or library director; I could have taken any of a number of more “important” or lucrative positions over the years. But I wasn’t driven to “succeed” in that way. Did I waste my potential? Was I lazy or fearful of success? Did I not have the potential, or did I not have the drive to become “more” than what I am?

Ultimately, I am driven (I hope) by the Holy Spirit. Not to become a “successful” person by the world’s standards, or even by my own ambitions, but to become the person God made me to be– a person who reflects His character and His priorities. I hope that I am becoming a “successful” follower of Christ– no matter what that looks like on the surface to classmates, neighbors, or family. I don’t need to be rich, famous, popular, or “important.” I DO need to be developing Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control (Galatians 5:22-23)

This week, as I have been meditating on the idea of “drive” and ambition and “success,” I started thinking about how it relates to prayer. I am driven to become more like Christ, and that includes being driven to live a life of prayer. But what really drives my prayer life? Because my pursuit of prayer and my practice of prayer may be “driven” by something other than pure motives:

Am I driven to pray because I believe that I am “ticking a box?” Have I read the Bible today? Check. Have I prayed some kind of prayer at some point? Check. Have I done a random act of kindness? Check. This is not really a spiritual pursuit of prayer. In fact, it can become idolatry– I can pray because I believe the act of praying makes me “better” or “good enough” to deserve God’s forgiveness or mercy. This drive comes from my own desire to control my growth and behavior. It is not “wrong” to set goals or make lists and stick to them. (After all, we are to be developing discipline and self-control!) But we must be careful not to shift our priorities from God’s discipline to our own lists and habits.
Am I driven to pray when/because others are watching? Am I seeking their approval more than I am seeking God’s face? Am I seeking to be “important” or pious, when God is asking me to be humble and obedient?

Perhaps I am praying out of fear, worry, or doubt. I am driven to pray in the same way that others are driven to consult a horoscope or carry a “lucky charm.” God wants me to trust Him. He knows that I will not always be perfect in Faith, but my prayers should not be double-minded (see James chapter one). I should not be using prayer to “hedge my bets” when faced with adversity. It is good to call out to God if we are frightened or uncertain, but we must develop Faith over fear. And in the end, God also wants us to be joyful in remembering and trusting in His promises
Am I driven by guilt or shame? It is good to confess our sins. But we also have to remember that IF we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us, and to cleanse us (1 John 1:9). If I am still confessing the same sins over and over, is it because I didn’t really trust God to forgive me, or because I didn’t really want to repent and change my ways– I just wanted a “free pass” to keep sinning, but not feel guilty for the consequences?
Maybe I am driven to pray for others because I think MY prayers can save them, or influence their life. Again, this can become idolatry. We have been given the amazing opportunity to pray for others. God already knows their needs– better than we can! And God can do miracles without any input from us. Yet He chooses to give us the privilege of praying and participating in His work! Again, it is commanded that we pray for one another, but we must remember to Whom we are praying. Our prayers for others are part of a circle– God’s Spirit moves us to compassion and concern– we take that compassion and lift up others before His throne. He knows what is best; He will do what is best. He wants us to participate, not to dictate!
Sometimes, I may be driven to “dictate” a particular outcome in my own life. My own ambition may be to become what I want, rather than what God wants for me. This can be a tricky concept. There are ambitions that God lays on our hearts– they are not wrong, but God’s timing may not match ours. I prayed for years to be married; to “find” the “right” mate, and to “be” the right mate. I even prayed that God would change my heart if my ambition was “wrong.” God’s timing was certainly not my timing. The ambition was not wrong, but my patience and trust needed to be developed.
Perhaps I am NOT driven to pray…maybe I lack the focus or lack the drive in my walk with Christ because I am drifting away from my first Love. I am driven to seek after something other than intimacy with my Creator. Maybe I am so content with my life “as it is” that I am not seeking direction and correction from the Holy Spirit. Perhaps I do not have the compassion and drive to pray for others because I do not see them fully as God sees them. Perhaps I do not trust God fully with the “little” things in my life because I do not see my need for His guidance.

I think it is not a bad thing to wrestle periodically with questions like this. Maybe today is the right time to ask, “Am I driven to pray? What drives me to my knees? What should be driving me there?”

August 9, 2023 0

A Prayer For Fathers

We are approaching Father’s Day. It is a day of celebration for many people, but it can also be a day of sadness for others. This year will be a milestone for our family, as my father passed away 25 years ago; and yet–we are preparing to celebrate the birth of my grand-nephew’s first child. This will make him a father, my nephew will become a grandfather, and my brother will become a great-grandfather! My husband is a father and grandfather, and so are three of his brothers. We also have brothers, brothers-in-law, nephews and cousins who are great dads. So we really have a lot to celebrate!

Fatherhood– the kind we celebrate– is more than just contributing genetic material to a new life, or claiming a child on an income tax statement, or showing up once in awhile for major events. Fatherhood involves sacrifice. It requires wisdom and patience. It involves ongoing commitments, and the tough love that says, “No” because it’s the right thing, rather than the easy thing to say. Fatherhood requires a man to be a teacher, provider, protector, defender, coach, and disciplinarian. It also requires humility, and grace, encouragement and sometimes tears. In addition, fatherhood requires prayer. No father is perfect, and no father can do all that he needs to in his own power. Fathers need our support and encouragement, our grace, and our prayers.

It is tempting to label our fathers. I have known “good” fathers. And I have known fathers who have abandoned or even abused their responsibilities, causing trauma, anguish, and hurt to their families, lasting for generations. My own father wasn’t perfect, but he was a “good” father. He was a man of humor and integrity, faithful, honest, loving and humble; a man of faith, and a man of honor. My father-in-law was the same. They left wonderful legacies of wisdom, hard work, and quiet strength. But I know of other fathers who have ruined the lives of their children (as well as their own lives) through fear, selfishness, addictions, abuse, anger, greed, and pride. Father’s Day can cause regret, envy, and bitterness in the hearts of many fathers and children alike. Many people would like to forget about their fathers on Father’s Day. Some don’t even know how to celebrate– they’ve never seen or heard from their father; some don’t even know his name!

But Father’s Day is not only for “good” fathers. It is a time to honor those who have been faithful, but it is also a time to reach out to those who need help. Good fathers are needed! And “bad” fathers need to be called out– not indulged or ignored, but held, guided, rehabilitated, or even incarcerated, for the good of their children. Hurting boys often grow up to be hurtful fathers. Hurting girls often end up in hurtful relationships. Hurtful fathers often struggle with their own baggage of hurt and disappointment from past generations, without knowing how to change. Fathers need more than a “day”, a cook-out, or another tie. They need a mission and a purpose; they need respect and forgiveness; they need encouragement and accountability.

My prayer today is that this Father’s Day can be a day of honor AND of healing for fathers and their children. I pray that struggling fathers will be encouraged and strengthened; that hard-working, faithful fathers will see the rewards of their efforts and find hope to keep going; that absent and apathetic fathers will wake up to the challenge and the gift of fatherhood; that broken fathers will find help and healing for themselves AND for their families; that hurting sons and daughters will find the grace to move beyond the pain of unmet expectations and abuse to become better men and women.

All that I pray for is made possible because we have a Heavenly Father– a perfect, loving, eternally wise Father– who loves us through our struggles and our pain. He knows our every need, sees our every tear, and hears our every prayer. He is ready to be our coach, our provider, our healer, our disciplinarian, and our protector. No matter our experiences or how we feel about our earthly fathers, or about being a father, we can trust Him to be all that we need. Our Heavenly Father will never abandon us, reject us, abuse us, or despise us. He will comfort, encourage, uplift, and guide us– now and forever. All we need to do is pray and accept Him for all that He is!

June 16, 2023 0

Afraid to Call?

Some fears are understandable. Some fears are even logical. Some are not. I wouldn’t say that I am “afraid” of most things. I don’t spend hours of my life being afraid of unlikely events, like being struck by lightning or choking to death on a cracker. I have a healthy fear of electricity and fire. I don’t tempt fate by walking along the edge of cliffs or hanging out of thirty-story windows (both of which are rare where I come from, anyway) . But I have two phobias– irrational fears–that plague me. The first is my fear of snakes. My fear of snakes has not ruined my life, but it has caused me to limit activities– mostly nature walks– where I might be exposed to seeing a snake. I avoid the reptile house at the zoo; I avoid visiting places where snakes are more common. I don’t like to see pictures of them; I don’t watch “snake” movies.

The second fear is more irrational and causes more problems in my daily life. I am afraid of phones. This doesn’t mean that I cannot make a phone call, or ever answer the phone. But if anyone asks about the best way to contact me, I always suggest e-mail, texts, or other forms of communication. I don’t like hearing the phone ring. I don’t like making calls. I don’t like answering calls. And it has little to do with who is on the other end. It has much more to do with the medium. I can’t see the other person’s face; I can’t predict whether or not the other person is busy or distracted; whether they want a quick answer or a lengthy talk; whether the conversation will end well or leave one (or both) of us at a loss. People call at their convenience–not at the convenience of the person at the other end. Are they in the middle of cooking dinner? Taking a shower? Having an important conversation with a spouse or child?

But if I determine never to make or receive a phone call, I will miss other important conversations– family members who live far away; business that cannot be conducted in person; appointments that need to be set up; news about births, deaths, hospitalizations, even prayers and prayer requests.

I say all this because I knew there are some people who have a phobia about prayer. They are afraid to pray– not just in public, but even privately. They fear that they will say the wrong thing, or that they will “bother” God with their petitions. Some fear that God will not hear their prayer or that they will not get an answer. Some are afraid that they will “get what they pray for”– that God will hear their prayer and answer it, but that the answer will involve change, hardship, or pain that they were hoping to avoid. Some fear that their prayers will not be “good enough;” that God will misunderstand their motives or be offended by their words or their lack of knowledge. Some people are afraid of God– that He will reject them and their prayers because of something they have done or the way they have lived in the past.

Prayer is not meant to be intimidating or difficult. It is healthy to have awe for God. Even “fear” of God– He holds the power of life and death; He cannot be fooled or mocked or bargained with; He knows everything about us, including our thoughts and our past–God is not to be trifled with, even in prayer. But God invites us to pray. He calls us to come to Him; He seeks our fellowship, no matter what we’ve done or what words we string together. There is no magical “prayer formula”– no phrases or special “religious” words or a certain ritual or routine– that we must use to be heard. God– who formed the universe and keeps it running– is never too busy or too distracted to listen to us. Even groans and whimpers are important to Him.

Don’t be “afraid to pray.” And don’t let a fear keep you from praying. Pray through the fear– draw near to God– and He has promised to draw near to you.

Many years ago, I prayed to God, that He would increase my patience. I had well-meaning people– even pastors and other Christians– who told me not to do it. They were afraid that God’s answer to such a prayer would bring difficulty– that God would answer my prayer by making me go through hard times to learn patience. And He did just that. I wanted to be married and have a family–and I spent nearly 30 years waiting and learning patience! But I would not go back and undo those years. God answered my prayer and He gave me a wonderful husband and family– in His time. Sometimes in those decades of wondering and hurting, I had pain. But I also had many blessings in singleness–opportunities I had never planned on, changes in perspective, unforeseen experiences and relationships that, I think, prepared me to be a better person and a better wife than I would have been at age 18 or 20.

My prayer for patience was something I felt strongly about– and patience is a Godly thing; it is an aspect of the fruit of the spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). I wasn’t praying for money or fame or a life without struggles. In fact– I wasn’t praying that God would “make me” patient. People who believe that my years of waiting for a husband were the direct result of my prayer for increased patience assume that God changed the circumstances of my life to force me to learn a lesson. But what if God changed my desires to match my circumstances? What if, knowing that I would marry after age 45, God put that prayer in my young and impatient heart? If I hadn’t asked for patience, would I have taken matters into my own hands and tried to “make” a family in my way and my time? Would I have experienced more pain– and brought pain to others– if I hadn’t learned patience?

Photo by Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas on Pexels.com

God knows what we need. He knows that there WILL be trouble and hardship in our lives. And He knows that we can survive, and even thrive, in times of trouble, because He will be there with us. Nothing about prayer should make us afraid. Nothing about God’s answers should cause us not to seek His face. He loves us extravagantly; He knows us intimately; He controls and safeguards our future with perfect power.

And we don’t need to use a phone to call on Him!

June 5, 2023 0

Tag: patience