“Praying” Favorites

There is a very dangerous mindset that many Christians fall into– that somehow, God has “favorites” among His children. That He listens to and answers prayer for certain people “better” or more often than others. As someone who has pursued a lifestyle of prayer for more than fifty years, I can categorically state that this is false. Time after time, the Bible teaches us that God does NOT play favorites. He listens to each of us and loves each of us with a boundless and eternal Love!

Yet, I often hear people say, “Please pray for me. You are a prayer warrior. God will listen to you.” Is this wrong? Is it wrong to ask others to pray for us?

Of course not. And it is good to find other Christians who are devoted to praying for others. We ARE “prayer warriors!” But that doesn’t mean that God listens to any of us more than anyone else, or that some prayers are somehow better or more powerful than others.

There are three aspects of this mindset that I think are particularly dangerous:

First– we can feel that our prayers are not important; that they are not “good enough.” Satan loves to have us wallow in our inadequacies and focus on our faults and shortcomings. Maybe I have trouble finding the “right” words when I pray. Maybe I don’t feel comfortable praying aloud in a group. And I hear someone else who sounds eloquent and polished. While that may impress or intimidate me, it cannot make a difference to God! NONE of us is “good enough” to impress God! He loves to hear from each unique and precious child! If we believe that God somehow has “favorites” in prayer, we will believe that He has favorites in other areas, too. That our gifts aren’t as “holy” as someone else’s, or that our faith depends on us working harder or doing “more.” And this is idolatry–saying that God’s grace is not sufficient for Him to accept us and bless us without some extra effort on our part.

Secondly– we can feel that prayer is for “other” people. If there are special people whose prayer lives are strong, then we can let them do the “heavy lifting” of praying, while we concentrate on giving or preaching, etc.. We SHOULD develop the particular gifts that God has given us– that is true– but prayer, just like spending time in worship, studying God’s word, practicing fellowship, and showing grace, is something everyone should be practicing. The Apostle Paul compared the Christian life to being an athlete or a soldier. We are ALL in training and part of a team. Prayer is not specialized training– it is basic and fundamental to the Christian Walk.

Finally–“Prayer Warriors” are fellow workers, not specialized saints. Some people practice prayer because they have more time to do so. Many of those who are considered “prayer warriors” are widows or widowers, retired, or even bedridden. Many of us are prayer warriors for a season. When we believe that God has “favorites” in prayer, we may elevate them beyond what we should. Once again, Satan loves to have us compare ourselves with others, rather than focus on how we can each serve God.

There are some Bible verses that speak to this, and many of them, taken out of context, can reinforce the wrong mindset. For example: James 5:16 says that the “fervent effectual prayer of a righteous man availeth much.” But the context is that of people praying for one another, not a single man doing the praying. It says more about passionate and persistent prayer than any identity as a prayer warrior among other “lesser” pray-ers.

First John 5:14 says, “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” That applies to any of us!

“The Lord is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth.” Psalm 145:18

“Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” Jeremiah 33:3

“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

“But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” James 1:6

“If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.” Matthew 21:22

There are only two things that the Bible says about “better” or more effective prayers. We must pray in FAITH, and in OBEDIENCE, (or praying within the will of God). NOTHING else is required for God to listen and respond. We are all “prayer warriors.” Prayer is part of our warfare against the enemy. And while it is wonderful to come together and know that others are praying for you, it is also important to remember that God has no favorites. His Grace, Power, Protection, and Love are equally available to anyone who asks in faith! There may be millions of pray-ers, but only one Sovereign, All-Powerful, Majestic and Loving God!

“Better-than” Prayers

I know a lot of “Prayer Warriors”– people who pray often, and fervently, and are known for their prayer habit. But I often hear a very disturbing statement in relation to such people. The thinking goes that if someone is a “Prayer Warrior” they get results. They have a direct line to Heaven– different and “better” than normal pray-ers. There are people who will hunt down a prayer warrior, believing that this action will be more effective than praying about an issue or problem themselves. Others try to emulate or copy the praying style of “prayer warriors,” thinking that the way someone words their prayers will make a difference in whether or not God will hear them. Still others will refuse to pray in public, because they say their prayers are not good enough. And this should not be!

We have a terrible tendency to compare. We compare our appearance, our social or economic status, our skills and abilities, and even our spirituality. “She’s so close to God!” “He knows the Bible so much better than I do!” And we think this determines whether or not God will listen to and act on our prayers. And Christians who could pray more often, more joyfully, and, yes, more effectively, simply give up on pursuing prayer, because they think others are so much “better” at it.

God is not a respecter of persons. His willingness to listen to our prayers does not depend on how many Bible verses we can quote or how many church services we attend each week, or how eloquently we can pray. God does not play favorites– He does not respond more quickly or more powerfully to some people because they call Him “Heavenly Father” instead of “Almighty God” or because they kneel instead of sitting, or because they are somehow “holier” than their neighbor.

God wants to hear from YOU. And yes, it can be a blessing and a comfort to know that others are praying for you or with you, but we should not measure our prayers against those of others around us. Especially if we allow ourselves to get discouraged in our pursuit of “better” prayer.

That said, there are a few things that can make our prayers “better”:

  • Be sincere– God doesn’t play games. He doesn’t respond to flattery, falsehoods, foolishness, or exaggerations. God already knows what you need, what you’re thinking, and who you are– who you REALLY are. Prayer that tries to cover up your real emotions or thoughts; prayer that tries to make you sound pious, needy, devout, etc., are not fooling anyone but you…
  • Be still–take time to get quiet before God– so that you can listen as well as speak! Meditate on WHO it is you are talking with, instead of just what you want to say.
  • Be submitted– Prayer is not about getting God to “deliver” on your wish list. Don’t just pretend to be pious, but determine that you will accept God’s perfect will and timing. And that you will accept God’s correction when you are having trouble accepting His will!
  • Be faithful–don’t give up. Pursuing Prayer means practicing prayer. You may find it gets easier to pray as you stumble through awkward prayers, instead of trying to be perfect out of the gate. Most “Prayer Warriors” started out the same way. Anyone–ANYONE–can be a prayer warrior!

Such “better” prayers will not impress God. God isn’t about being impressed. He IS about being personal, loving, wise, and sovereign. But such prayers will be “better than” those prayed in pride, or prayed inconsistently, or without fully acknowledging God’s character and authority.

My goal is not to be a “better” pray-er than someone else. I may never be acknowledged by others as a “Prayer Warrior.” But my goal is to be disciplined and trained in the pursuit of Prayer. Every day, we face spiritual warfare– in that sense we are all prayer “warriors.” And I may be a foot soldier in this war, but I want to be the best foot soldier I can be! I want to be “better than” I was yesterday, and even better tomorrow!

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