The Ghost of Christmas Past

Charles Dickens wrote “A Christmas Carol”– a (literally) haunting tale of greed, bitterness, and, in the end, redemption. Set in Victorian England, the story involves a miser named Scrooge, his business partner, Marley, who has been dead for seven years, and three mysterious spirits: The Ghost of Christmas Past, the Ghost of Christmas Present, and the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come…

Scrooge and Marley

Scrooge doesn’t really hate Christmas. He considers it a Humbug– an annoying and worthless distraction from the “reality” of making money. What bothers Scrooge– what eats at him and rules his actions– is the fear of poverty and powerlessness. He avoids relationships so that he cannot be hurt or abandoned. He avoids spending money– even for common comforts like coal to heat his office–for fear that he will fall into poverty. He does not like people because he will not trust anyone enough to risk getting hurt or used.

Scrooge’s only “friend,” his former partner Marley, lived by similar principles during his lifetime. He “visits” Scrooge on Christmas Eve to warn him of the fate that awaits those who fail to realize that there is more to life than making and keeping money. “Mankind was my business. The common welfare was my business; charity, mercy, forbearance, benevolence, were all my business. The dealings of my trade were but a drop of water in the comprehensive ocean of my business!” Marley has managed to arrange for Scrooge to be haunted by memories of the past, visions of the present, and shadows of what may be in the future.

The first of these “spirits” reminds Scrooge of Christmases from his childhood and early adulthood. Some of the memories are sad– Scrooge is left to spend the holiday alone at school, as his cold and distant father refuses to show him love, mercy, or guidance. Later, Scrooge is reminded of how his decision to pursue wealth alienated the woman he could have married. But there are happier memories, too. His first boss, Mr. Fezziwig, brought happiness and a sense of camaraderie and purpose to Scrooge’s early employment. He celebrated both hard work and the joy of fellowship with his employees. Scrooge sees visions of his beloved sister and is reminded that he has a family (his sister’s son) with whom he could make and share happy memories– if only he would choose to do so.

I will write about the other visitations later, but I want to camp out here for a little bit.

What memories would the Ghost of Christmas Past bring to me? To you? Are there sad or painful memories of Christmases without loved ones? Christmases that included anger or rejection? Christmases spent with poverty, uncertainty, or sickness? Would you feel bitterness? Fear? Guilt? Regret? Or would there be nostalgia for days gone by? Longing for family members who have passed? Questions about what might have been?

It is tempting sometimes to shove our memories of Christmas past in a closet or an old trunk and try to forget them. In Dickens’ story, Scrooge ends up desperately trying to snuff out the light of Truth that the spirit is holding. He doesn’t want to remember; doesn’t want to know or deal with the pain and loss of his past.

But before we can truly live in the present, we must confront the past. We do not have to live there. Our memories– good and bad– are but shadows of the things that have been. But they can cast long and devastating shadows if we let them. Denying past pain or trauma can give us a false sense of control. Burying ourselves in work or pleasure or entertainment may feel like a solution. Being cautious and angry and cynical may seem like wisdom. We can blame others, blame ourselves, even blame God for our feelings of hurt and fear of being hurt again and again. OR we can, with the light of truth, revisit our past. We can discover the healing power of redemption and forgiveness. We can– we must– still acknowledge the pain, the injustice, the grief that lies on our past. But we also must see that the shadows of the past only fall behind us. However the past may have shaped us, damaged us, challenged us, or forged us, the present and the future can be turned in a new direction.

And that is possible because of Christmas– because of Christ!

When Scrooge first visits his past with the Ghost of Christmas Past, the first image he experiences is of his classmates from school riding in sleighs and wagons singing Christmas carols. Singing! He could not join in. As an adult he has chosen not to join others as they sing of the wonder of Christ’s birth. But the carols echo– their message endures! Christ is Born! Glory to the Newborn King!

My prayer today is that Christmas past holds some happy memories for you. But the very Good News of Christmas is that it isn’t just about the past. And our past Christmases don’t have to haunt us. Because the Light of Truth– The True Light of the World (John 1:9) –that came on that first Christmas so long ago leads the way forward!

“The Willing Suspension of Disbelief”

It’s been nearly 45 years since I first heard this phrase, but it has resonated with me ever since.  Samuel Taylor Coleridge wrote of it over 200 years ago, speaking of how readers interact with literature, especially when it contains fantastical or supernatural elements.  Our high school English teacher and drama coach, Mrs. Barr spoke of it not only in the context of literature but in the context of the theater.  In fact, in all art, the artist depends on at least some willing suspension of disbelief on the part of his/her audience. 

 In visual art, we must believe that a few strategic blobs of color, or carefully shaped pieces of marble or wood have captured something timeless and true about a single moment in time– that movement and emotion and life can be held immortal on a canvas or a statue or a tapestry.  We must suspend our disbelief that paint, or wood, marble or stone exists only as itself– in the artist’s capable hands, mere matter transcends its ordinary form to touch our very soul.   In music, we can hear, in the well-played notes of an instrument, the sounds of birds, the falling rain, the crashing of thunder, the marching of armies, or the buzzing of bees.  Music doesn’t just touch our ears, it can touch our souls. Shakespeare also alluded to this in a comical way: “Is it not strange that sheep’s guts should hale souls out of men’s bodies” (Much Ado About Nothing– Act II, Scene 3) We can listen to a symphony without being moved, but in the willing suspension of disbelief, we can be transformed and inspired by notes on a page and breath being blown into wood or brass or fingers or bows being drawn over “sheep’s guts”.

 In literature or in the movies, we must suspend our disbelief that mythical creatures, aliens, monsters, and talking animals live among us as a normal occurrence– for the duration of the story…Dragons must be vanquished, Fairy Godmothers must be allowed to help poor Cinderella to the ball, and The Raven must repeat his ominous line, “Nevermore.”  Frodo must hide from orcs and Nazgul in order to reach the Fires of Doom and destroy the One Ring. Charlotte must spin her wordy webs and Papa Bear must exclaim, “someone has been sitting in my chair.”  As children, we shed our disbelief readily and enter into the story, falling in love (or having nightmares about) imaginary characters. As adults we become cynical, and lose some of our ability to enter into imagination and other-wordly realms.

I was recently reminded of this concept of the willing suspension of disbelief in two different contexts– loss of Faith, and the deception of the internet– including “fact checking” and AI.  Very different experiences, but I think they both tie in.

First, in the loss of Faith.  I know so many people, family, friends, even strangers, who write passionately about their loss of Faith.  Oh, they don’t call it that.  They have other terms, other catchphrases– they talk about their “Deconversion” or their “Awakening”.  They are too smart, too savvy, too enlightened to give credence to Faith in Jesus, or in any “god” or divine being.  After all, they cannot see “Him” or “it”; they cannot prove His existence (they can’t prove His non-existence either, but that’s another story). Believing in God, they claim, is the same as believing in fairy tales.

And yet…Keats once posited, “Beauty is truth, truth beauty– That is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know” (Ode on a Grecian Urn).  Earlier in his poem, he also says, “Heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard are sweeter;  therefore, ye soft pipes, play on; not to the sensual ear, but, more endear’d, pipe to the spirit ditties of no tone…”  There is an acknowledgement that we do not just exist in a physical plane, but in a world of metaphysical marvels– memory, hope, and yes, even “fairy tales”.

Of course, we know that there is no Cinderella– no “happily ever after” in this world.  Life is not a fairy tale story.  But our lives ARE stories– we have a beginning and an end.  We want to find a purpose, a reason for being who we are, where we are, and even when we are.  We search for our “true” identities.  We dream dreams and harbor hopes.  We battle evil forces– the demanding boss, the annoying neighbors, blizzards and tornadoes, cancer…And we believe very strongly in concepts of justice and injustice, fairness and unfairness, goodness and evil–metaphysical concepts.  We long to be understood, accepted, “seen,” and loved (ever after!).  And we must suspend our disbelief in the face of evil to search for the good.  We must suspend our disbelief in our own worth to make choices that preserve our health and develop our latent talents.  Indeed, we must believe and cherish what we do NOT see or have never experienced, or we will be crushed by our (often temporary) realities.  When cynicism and disbelief BECOME our belief system, we become the living dead.  Oh, we can continue doing “good” things without believing in God; we can espouse a code of “good living”, we can take care of our bodies and emotions within a framework of humanism and self-esteem.  But we will not experience the fullness of Truth, or Beauty, or majesty, that lives in Faith.

Loss of Faith represents, what I would call an “unwillingness” to suspend disbelief, or a tendency to cling to only that which can be experienced on a physical plane. But there is another danger– that of an “unwilling” suspension of disbelief–believing things that are deceptive, because they are presented as “truth.” This includes such things as “fake news” on the internet, “fact checkers” who tilt the truth and “throw shade” on inconvenient or uncomfortable truths, and AI-generated stories meant to “create” truth  where none exists.

I would like to say that I am immune to such things; that my knowledge and dependence on truth cannot be subjected to manipulation.  But that is not always true.  I see a touching story on Facebook about a young person who is missing– please spread the word– only to find out that the post is several months out of date.  I see a meme that accuses one political big-shot or a celebrity or even a corporation or business of being corrupt, unfair, evil, etc., and I am outraged– until I realize that the original post was generated by a person or group that is completely unknown to me.  I don’t know their true experience, or their motivation in spreading this information (or false information).  It MAY be true, it MAY be completely false, but it is most likely somewhere in between– not nearly as bad as portrayed, or as every bit as bad as other politicians, celebrities, or companies who aren’t mentioned in the meme or article.

Outrage— especially outrage that is deliberately and manipulatively generated– is the suspension of not just disbelief, but of discernment. We immediately judge.  We immediately feel our blood pressure rise, our cheeks flame, and our breathing accelerate.  We become passionately angry, but we also become instantly indignant and self-righteous.  I would never I cannot tolerate… But what have we done on a smaller scale? Are we SO innocent? Do we have the authority to judge based on a single article or photo?

But it is not just outrage that can be deliberately and manipulatively generated.  AI and bad actors on the internet and other media sources can also manipulate our hopes, our disappointments, and our beliefs in what has happened and what is happening around us.  Stories appear online that sound authentic, narrated by well-modulated voices (many of which seem familiar), telling us that this event took place and changed someone’s life, or that this celebrity has finally “spilled the dirt” about beloved co-stars who died a couple of decades ago.  Others purport to give “wise words” from aging actors or writers or recently dead corporate gurus.  We suspend our disbelief, or our suspicions, because we trust the voice or the photoshopped picture.  We choose to believe the worst of people we already dislike.  We choose to believe only the best of people we like.  If a stranger came up to me on the street with a story like this, I would be suspicious.  Who are they? Why are they telling me this?  Why should I trust them?  But we suspend our disbelief if we see it in print with what looks like credible photos and when narrated by what we assume to be a credible voice.  If we bother to look at the source, even that seems credible– I may not have heard of this news service, but it has the word “news” in its heading…

We put our Faith in things seen– even if they are false, while we hold truth and beauty to be suspicious, because we have lost the ability to hope and trust in something beyond our own wisdom and personal perceptions.  

We need dreamers and artists and writers who see truth and beauty in the universal and metaphysical realities of faith and hope and majesty.  And we need people with the discernment to disbelieve what strangers claim to “show” and “tell” us with their clever manipulations.

Both Faith and “the willing suspension of disbelief” depend on the Will.  We have to make choices in what we are willing to believe and how far we are willing to search for the truth– both in what we can see, and in what we cannot.

Declaration of Dependence

Today, America marks the 249th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence. In it, colonial leaders listed several reasons why they no longer held allegiance to the British Crown. Many of their reasons involved abuses by the King or by Parliament in relating to their colonial citizens. Taxation without representation; passing unjust laws; requiring people to quarter (feed and house) soldiers who often harmed and cheated them; refusing to hold the soldiers accountable for their offenses– even murder; refusing to allow the colonials to trade with other nations, etc. But there was something more.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

In drafting and ratifying these words, the founders of the United States did something unique. They did not just establish an independent government; they established a model for both independence and dependence IN government. Government is not independent of certain inalienable rights, nor of the Creator of those rights. Governments are not the highest authority in the land. Governments are instituted and derive their power, not by their own actions and decisions, but from the consent of the governed. Governments DEPEND on their ability and willingness to serve the people.

Of course, there are wicked and improper governments, and Britain’s rule in 1776 was not the worst example of tyranny or despotism the world had ever seen. The United States has not always lived up to the ideals and principles of the Declaration of Independence. Less than a century after the Declaration was adopted, the United States was engulfed in a war that tested its ideals. The nation was divided by the issue of slavery. Nearly half of the states still practiced slavery, meaning that hundreds of thousands of people were being treated far worse than the “rebellious” colonists of previous generations. Our nation as a whole was not delivering on its promised declaration that “all men are created equal” or that they were endowed by their creator with rights to “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness”.

But when our nation has remembered its Dependence– our need for God and our need to care for the safety and opportunity for those under our jurisdiction–remarkable things have happened. The union was “saved.” Voting rights were not just extended but enshrined in our Constitution. Americans joined the fight in Europe and around the world on more than one occasion to secure rights for people who were being oppressed, tortured, and even exterminated. The “Promise of America” draws people from diverse nations and cultures and stands as a model for the rest of the world.

Sadly, today, many here in the United States want Independence from America. Our culture has devalued life, exchanged liberty for conformity, and traded the pursuit of happiness for indulgence and selfishness. We want to be independent of responsibility– to our families, to our neighbors, to our nation, and to God. We do not want a government that protects those rights that are endowed; instead, we want a government to give us assumed “rights” that are really permissions to defy God’s laws. We want to be free to redefine morality, escape the consequences of our own poor choices, and feel virtuous without pursuing virtue.

What will happen to our country if this trend continues? On the eve of celebrating our 250th year, we may be on the brink of falling apart. Issues like abortion, immigration, health care mandates, and transgenderism threaten to divide our country, just as slavery did over 150 years ago. Americans are divided on political, economic, religious, and cultural issues. We can’t seem to agree on what we mean by “rights, ” “freedom,” or “pursuit of happiness.” We can’t even seem to define what a “woman” is or decide how many genders to fight for. Everyone wants to speak out, but no one seems willing to listen– except to find another point of disagreement. We are no longer “united” states– we are warring factions in a series of culture wars.

But what happens when American Christians declare our Dependence on God and on His Word? Many around us have declared their independence from God’s laws–even to the point of denying His existence. Many people live in a self-imposed despotism; they are enthralled by a false “freedom” from morality, reverence, and even common sense. But Christians– wherever they live– are called to submit to the authority of Christ above all. We depend on Him– not on our customs, not on our history, not even on the words of the Declaration of Independence. And we are to lean on God, not on our own understanding or our superior morality or our ability to shout louder than the next person! Our Freedom comes through Christ alone!

True “freedom” comes from dependence, not independence. When we depend on Christ’s finished work on the Cross, we are free from the weight of Sin and the power of Death. When we depend on God’s wisdom, we find understanding. When we depend on God’s guidance and discipline, we gain freedom from guilt and shame. When we depend on God’s power to channel our emotions and energy, we find purpose and joy.

Today, I declare my utter dependence on God– on the Salvation He provided through Jesus Christ, and on the power of His Holy Spirit to lead me through this life. I am glad to be an American, but my ultimate citizenship is in Heaven. The “promise of America” is a good thing: the promise of Heaven is glorious and life-changing!

I Wonder…

Advent is a time of waiting. It is a time of wonder. But it is also a time to wonder–to ponder and reflect on the meaning of Jesus Christ. Why did He come? Why did He choose to be born where and when and how He did? The Bible gives us some of the “big” answers– He came to give His life as a ransom for many (Matthew 20:28, Mark 10:45); He came to “bear witness to the truth” (John 18:37); He came to fulfill the law and the prophets (Matthew 5:17); He came to give salvation and everlasting life (John 3:16)–and more. But there are still many things to ponder.

I wonder why Jesus came as a helpless infant. He could have taken on flesh and appeared as a full-grown man, and a king at that. He chose to come in weakness and in need– the Lord of all Creation needing to be fed and clothed and carried from place to place.

I wonder about His early life. Jesus had to learn how to crawl, to walk, to talk, to run, to write. Imagine, the eternal Word of God having to learn to speak! The One who would one day walk on water had to learn to take His first steps on land. He was once toothless! Did He lisp when He was first learning to talk? Did He fall down as He learned to walk? Did He run too fast, and skin His knees? Were there foods He didn’t like, or others He preferred? Did the other kids tease Him and hurt His feelings? Did He suffer from headaches or toothaches or upset stomach (or even diarrhea)? Did He get splinters working with Joseph in the carpenter’s shop? Did He have a favorite teacher? When did Joseph die, and how did this change Jesus’s family situation?

Jesus was fully human, and He lived as a baby, and a child, and as a man. His ministry spanned only a short three years– less than a tenth of His earthly life. What did He see in those years? What did He learn? What did He “wonder?”

I wonder.

What if part of the process of Jesus’s earthly life was to remind us that God is with us from our earliest, neediest, and most vulnerable moments to our last breath? What if it was to remind us that even Jesus had “bad hair days” and skinned knees? That He came to experience ALL that is part of being human, including the long wait to grow to maturity and to fulfill His mission, and the hundred little obstacles of everyday life? Or maybe it was to remind us that there is awesome wonder in the ordinary–that even God found it worth marveling over those little moments with family or friends, or watching a glorious sunset, or catching a firefly.

It’s so easy for us to lose the wonder of the Christmas season. But it’s also easy to lose the wonder of those ordinary moments–a shared smile or tear, the excitement of someone else’s birthday, the taste of fresh-baked bread, the way the sun sparkles on the lake. Jesus came to redeem us. And in the process, He came to redeem our sense of Wonder, too.

Meaningless?

I denied myself nothing my eyes desired;

    I refused my heart no pleasure.

My heart took delight in all my labor,

    and this was the reward for all my toil.

 Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done

    and what I had toiled to achieve,

everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;

    nothing was gained under the sun.

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11 (NIV via biblegateway.com)

The persistent theme of Ecclesiastes is that everything done “under the sun” is meaningless–wisdom, riches, hard work, morality, pleasure–it all ends in death and futility. In the end, the author (presumed to be Solomon, the wisest king who ever lived) concludes that the whole “duty” or purpose of mankind is to fear God and keep His commandments, because God will judge every deed and hidden thought.

Sometimes, it can be difficult to pray when life seems “meaningless.” I was reminded recently of a time when my life seemed pointless and pathetic. I was nearing 40, single and childless. I had a good job, and enough to live comfortably, but I wasn’t a “success” by many people’s standards. I owned a car, but it was getting old. I did not own a home, and I hadn’t taken a vacation in years (although I had traveled for work, and counted that as something). I had a cat. I was a single, frumpy, middle-aged cat lady. And when I prayed, I often asked, “Why, God?” And when I read Ecclesiastes, I got depressed.

But Solomon is writing about life from a distinctive point of view. He sets out to find a purpose for life “under the sun.” When I was looking at my life from that perspective, everything DID seem meaningless. It was meaningless for me to save up for a house if I had no one to leave it to; meaningless to pursue higher career goals or travel, when I had no one to share it with.

A very wise co-worker noticed my depression and dissatisfaction. She pointed out that purpose, happiness, and satisfaction came from God, but that I had to choose my perspective. God had given me life, and purpose– a job, shelter, comfort, family and friends. I could grump and grouse about what I didn’t have, or the meaning I couldn’t find– OR I could trust that God would reveal meaning and purpose as I kept pursuing Him.

Instead of asking, “Why, God?”, I began asking other questions. “What do You want me to continue doing?” “How can I serve You right where I am?” “Who can I bless and encourage, today?” And even, “How can I use these experiences and feelings to honor You?” My prayers included fewer gripes and regrets. I stopped asking “what if?” and started asking, “what next?”

God stepped in and offered me the opportunity to change my circumstances. It didn’t happen right away, but after a few years, I became a wife, a stepmother, and a grandmother. I left my job–I made even less money, and I had to learn new skills and deal with new challenges, but I also learned more trust in God’s wisdom and timing. What also happened was that I gained a renewed sense of purpose and a new focus. I wasn’t doing things “under the sun,” but “under the Son!” Somehow, I had forgotten to look for my meaning and purpose in being a child of God and had turned my eyes inward.

It seems like a bone-headed mistake in retrospect, but, then again, even Solomon wasted some of his life looking for meaning and purpose in all the wrong places! And those years were not meaningless or wasted. I learned patience, perspective, compassion, and wisdom to pass on to others who may be in similar circumstances.

Recently, my husband and I decided to close up our shop. We have to reevaluate our circumstances– will we have to sell our store? Our home? What will happen as we near retirement? I will have to look for another job, and I will probably have to learn yet another set of skills. And our family dynamics have changed a lot, too. My mom passed away last year, and my mother-in-aw has had some health issues. Our son’s family is dealing with divorce, so we don’t get to see the grandchildren as often as we used to. But I’m ready to ask, “What next!” My purpose and meaning don’t come from my circumstances. God’s plans are bigger and better than mine, and I can trust that He has a purpose in every circumstance I face.

“Father, today, may I focus on the meaning and purpose that can only come from seeking You. You are the author of purpose, of wisdom, and of wholeness. And as You reveal Yourself to me, help me to reflect and share Your wisdom and character to others. Amen”

Finding Beauty in the Broken

The other day, a local artist stopped by our shop. He commented on the giant mirrors we have lining the north wall of the store. I explained that when we first moved in, the mirrors were left over from a dance studio that had once inhabited the space. They left the mirrors and the barres on the opposite wall. We liked them and left them in place. The mirrors bring in a lot of extra light, and they make our space look bigger than it actually is. The barres make convenient spaces to hang linens and other items for display.

The artist nodded. I went on to explain that we hated the thought of someone removing the mirrors (four panels that run about 7 feet in height and stretch about 30 feet along the wall) because of the risk that they would be shattered and ruined. Then, the artist told his story. One of his early studios was in a small garage lined with large mirrors. Like us, he liked that the mirrors made the small space feel lighter and larger. The extra light was also helpful in creating his art. But when he moved to another studio, the panels were removed, and they broke into several pieces. Instead of throwing them out, however, he glued them into a new pattern on the walls of his now larger studio. He used the broken mirrors to create light and beauty– different from before, but with new meaning and renewed purpose.

And it reminded me of what Jesus does for us. We were created to reflect the light of God’s love, to bring light into a dark world. But often, we feel shattered and useless. Sometimes, God is trying to move us into a different space; different circumstances; a different outlook. From our perspective, it looks like failure. We might even try to glue ourselves back into the same old pattern, but without success. And often, we expect God to see us as just so many shattered pieces, ready to be swept up and thrown out. Or something so broken that we no longer have the power to reflect His light.

But God is an artist. He delights in rescuing those of us who are broken. God redeems our purpose and our worth, giving us new and abundant life. He finds beauty in the broken, and a message in our mess. The prophet Jeremiah speaks to this through the artistic metaphor of the Potter and the clay. (see Jeremiah chapter 18) God molds us and shapes us; He has the power and authority to reshape us for new beauty and usefulness. God was speaking to Jeremiah about the nation of Israel. They had broken their covenant with God, and He was about to punish them. But God still had plans for their renewal and their future– including their ultimate redemption at the hands of His Son! God doesn’t give up on us. Of course, God’s message through Jeremiah is not only about renewal, but about submitting to His design and purpose for us. We cannot reshape ourselves– whether clay pots or shattered mirrors. Only God has the power to shape our purpose.

But more than that, God can reshape our outlook, so that WE too can see the beauty around us, in spite of the brokenness. We see people differently; we see situations differently. We see possibilities where we used to see only problems. We see hope, where there used to be despair. And we are empowered to reflect that hope to those around us. Even though we have been broken, we can still fulfill our God-given purpose of reflecting light and love and beauty.

God has been preparing me for a big move lately. After several years, David and I will be closing our shop at the end of this year. Someday, another renter or owner may remove the lovely mirrors that line our north wall. And part of my heart feels broken at the thought of “moving on” and starting a new chapter. But my artist neighbor reminded me that there is often great beauty in the broken– if we have the eyes to see it. God isn’t finished with me– I will find a meaningful way to serve and share and reflect His love. It may be in a different way or a different place. And our shop will go on to be used for another purpose at some point. And even if the lovely mirrors are no longer in place, the north wall will have beauty and purpose for someone else.

You-nique!

Have you ever read through a passage in the Bible and been astonished, or even annoyed, at the long lists of names? Genesis, Chronicles, Ezra, even some of Paul’s letters contain genealogies and long strings of names– people whose life stories and deeds we will never know. Yet they are included in the greatest story of all time! God knows each name. He knows who they were, what they did, their hopes and dreams, their fears and disappointments– even the number of hairs on each of their heads!

“And the very hairs on your head are all numbered…”– Jesus Christ in Luke 12:7a (New Living Translation)

God knows you in the same intimate way. In the entire history of the universe, and in all the future years to come, there has only ever been, and only ever will be ONE of YOU. Your fingerprints, your retinas, your DNA are all unique to YOU. Even if you are a twin or triplet– even if you are the “spitting image” of one of your ancestors or relatives, NO ONE else can ever share your life story. Even if you were cloned, and there was another person who shared your exact physical nature, they would not share your soul– your thoughts, emotions, ambitions, griefs, and experiences.

And you are uniquely qualified in prayer. No one else can share your thoughts and feelings, your praises and confessions, your requests or petitions. Thirty people can pray for the same situation, the same person; there will be thirty different prayers! Even if you say the same words, or stand in agreement with another’s spoken words, you will not pray with the same exact thoughts. Your heart-cry is different from everyone else’s.. and God hears and understands each unique prayer. Out of all the prayers rising to heaven every second of every day, God can distinguish and delight in YOURS!

Some days it is frustrating to feel like “just another number” or “lost in the shuffle” of other people waiting in line, or trying to conduct business over the phone, or scrolling though social media. But you are never just a number to God. He knows your name– he has known it from eternity past! Your prayers are not put “on hold,” or filed away for later review, or answered with a form letter. God is personal– eight billion times over! He doesn’t just celebrate your uniqueness– He designed it!

What unique and amazing prayer will you pray today? How can you live out your unique personality and purpose this week? Who might be encouraged by your unique smile, your prayers, or your personal touch as you go through your day? Just remember, no one else can be you– no one else can show God’s character and His love exactly like you can! God didn’t send someone else to do what only you can. But He will be there each moment to help you do it– in your own YOU-nique way.

Why, O Lord?

We are a curious race, humans–we ask a lot of questions of ourselves, each other, and even of God. How did He make the universe? When will Jesus return? Who can we trust in this world? Where is Heaven? What must we do to be saved? But the majority of our questions are “Why” questions. Why did Jesus come? Why did He have to die? Why did God make snakes and mosquitoes and platypuses? Why are men and women so different? Why am I… (short/tall, fat/thin, clumsy, “odd,” misunderstood, etc.)? Why are You so mysterious? Why do bad things happen to “good” people?

I was thinking about this last question this week. I don’t have any definitive answer to that– no one I know has any better answer. God has not given us a definitive answer, either. We are to trust that His ways are wise and best and perfect, but faith and trust require–well, Faith and Trust! We know God has done good things in the past. We know He has redeemed what seemed like hopeless situations. We know His promises, and we have seen some of them fulfilled. Still, such a question can often leave us blindsided and tongue-tied.

There are many learned thinkers, philosophers, and apologists who have written whole books on this subject, but I want to just pose a couple of ideas to help us, not ANSWER the question, but understand the question a little better.

First, the question, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” is really two questions: “Why do ‘bad’ things happen?” AND “Why do they happen to ‘good’ people?” So let’s look at the questions separately.

“Why do ‘bad’ things happen?” What do we mean when we say “bad things?” There are many circumstances, events, diagnoses, and occurrences that may be called “bad.” Death is “bad.” Indigestion is “bad.” Stubbing one’s toe is “bad.” Being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease is “bad.” Divorce is “bad.” Slavery and abuse are “bad.” House fires, job losses, being mugged, being stranded without heat in a blizzard, an outbreak of acne, being laughed at– all these are “bad.” But they are all different. Many “bad” things are the direct result of sin–we suffer the consequences of our own sin; we are the victims of the sins of others. The consequences of addiction can be horrific, but we often lack compassion for those who are suffering, because “they brought it upon themselves.” But what about the innocent victim of rape or child sex trafficking? Such acts leave victims traumatized and broken. Both are “bad,” but we are angered and frustrated even more when “bad” consequences also seem unjust and unfair. And what about natural disasters? Are they the result of sin, as well? The Bible suggests that they are. When God placed Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, they lived naked, carefree, and unafraid. Only after their sin did God place a curse on the land– Adam would now have to cultivate the land in order to get food. There would be enmity between the woman and the serpent. Eve (and all women after her) would have pains in childbirth. (see https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=genesis+3%3A+14-20&version=NIV) There is no mention of hurricanes, blizzards, or earthquakes prior to the Fall of mankind, though it is speculation on my part, to say that there were none.

God has promised to make all things new. There will be a time when the consequences of Sin will be eradicated. We will not even remember the suffering we endured in life, in light of the blessings of eternity. So, though God doesn’t answer our question of why “bad” things happen, He does give us the assurance that such “bad” things do not determine our destiny, nor do they happen without His knowledge or outside of His will! We cannot understand God’s purposes in allowing us to suffer, though sometimes we may see a hint of good even in the midst of tragedy.

And God is loving and gracious in the face of our confusion and pain. We CAN ask God “Why?!” “Why me?” “Why this?” “Why now?” “Why them?” Why, O Lord!?” Many of the Psalms speak to this very question. But in the middle of his anguish, the psalmist often finds comfort and renewed strength to face the struggle, when he turns to God. Asking why is not always a sign of weak or failed Faith. Instead, it is acknowledging before God that we ache. We grieve. And we NEED HIM!”

And what about the second part of the question: “Why do (bad things) happen to ‘good’ people?” What makes a person “good?” Jesus was “Good,” And yet He questioned the rich young ruler, “Why do you call me good? No one is Good– except God alone.” (see https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke+18%3A18-27&version=MSG) We tend to think of the people we know and like as “good.” And we have a natural expectation that their lives should be “good” also– free of pain or struggle. But that is not realistic in this world. The actor, Michael J. Fox has been suffering for years with Parkinson’s Disease. This seems unfair and cruel. How could God let him suffer like this? But there are many thousands of people suffering from Parkinson’s Disease. Some of them are homeless addicts; some are in prison for rape or embezzlement. Is their suffering any less than that of Mr. Fox? Is it somehow less tragic or unjust?

The sad and shocking truth is that none of us “deserves” a pain-free, struggle-free life. Bad things DO happen. And they happen to people we like, and people we hate; people we judge to be “good” and people we judge to be “bad.” God does not “play favorites.” Yes, God can, and often does intervene on someone’s behalf through prayer, or for His own bigger purposes. But He does not “dish out” suffering to those He dislikes out of spite or revenge. Nor does He cause His faithful to float through life without ever tasting bitterness and grief. Jesus made many promises, but one of them was this: “in this world you will have trouble; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) He didn’t promise that you might have a little spot of trouble, or that you might look around and see others in trouble– He promised that we would have trouble. Not because we are “bad” or “good” but because that’s the way this world is.

I find it odd that atheists often pose this question as a way of trying to “prove” that God doesn’t exist. They pose the question as an accusation. “If there is a kind and loving God, why do bad things happen to good people?” But if they believe that there ISN’T a kind and loving God, how do THEY explain why bad things happen to good people? How do they define “good” people and “bad” things? Without a Good God, where is the expectation of good things happening to good people? Without God, there are no objectively “good” things or “bad” things happening– only random events without divine cause or purpose. You can’t blame a non-existent God for things He either caused or didn’t prevent. Such questions are meant to plant doubt in the mind of a believer, but they fail to answer the greater question– Why do Good things happen to undeserving people? Why do we sometimes find joy and peace and strength in the midst of our suffering? Why do human beings continue to Hope?

Finally– the ultimate example of God letting something “bad” happen to someone “good” can be seen in the central image of our Faith– the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. Jesus was sentenced unjustly to a torturous death and public humiliation. He was separated from God the Father, and carried the punishment for OUR sins so that WE could be reconciled to God. Even though the purpose of Christ’s suffering has been revealed to us, it doesn’t negate the agony and trauma He faced. And even HE cried out from the Cross– “My God, My God, WHY have YOU forsaken ME?!” (Matthew 27:46)

God does not answer the question of why “bad” things happen in this world. But in the crucifixion, Jesus proves to us that He shares and understands our suffering; that He has the power to overcome and redeem our traumas; and that He will hear our sincere cries of “WHY?!” He will hear when we turn toward Him, instead of turning our back on Him. He will hear our broken heart. He will heal our broken heart.

WHY?– Because He loves us!

“Bathed” in Prayer

We were reviewing last week’s VBS at our church–sharing stories, “crunching” numbers, evaluating the various elements that made up each day… One of the phrases that came out of our various talks and meetings was that Bible School week had been “bathed in prayer.” What does that actually mean?

For me, it represents how prayer surrounded us– much like bath water.

  • It covered every part of our efforts– we prayed for the children who were registered– and those who came unexpectedly as guests. We prayed for the families of the children–those from our church, those from neighboring churches, and those who are unchurched. We prayed for all the volunteers– teens, adults, those who where there each day of VBS, and those who helped before and after with decorations, building, providing supplies and funding, advertising, etc. We prayed for each team– teaching, drama, singing, videography, sound and lights, registration, group leaders, science and crafts, snacks, sports and games, record-keeping, security, and more! We prayed weeks before VBS, and we are still praying that the seeds planted last week will grow and produce a harvest!
  • It flowed freely. We had organized prayer meetings, and spontaneous outbursts of prayer. We prayed in the “opportune moment” and in the planned schedule. Prayer was a consistent part of each day, but came in random bursts, as well. It came from staff, from volunteers, from children and retirees. Everyone can’t work at VBS– but everyone can pray!
  • It “cleansed” our efforts. It is easy to get side-tracked with the chaos and fol-de-rol of an event like Bible School. It is easy to lose focus and let stress, frustration, and even bitterness worm their way into our efforts. On the very first day, our registration and check-in system crashed– and this could have been a disaster. But we had prayed before; we prayed during our confusion, and we praised God that, system or no, HE knew who was there, where they should go, and how we should respond to THEM. We are in the middle of a construction project in our children’s wing– we had to plan around fewer classrooms available, and less indoor space. On the hottest week of the summer (so far) we had to hope that the weather would cooperate for our games. God provided cloud cover on at least two of the mornings, and overnight showers– we did not have to deal with heavy rains or the worst heat of the day on any of our days! And (at least partly) because we had prayed in advance, we were grateful instead of stressful about our circumstances, marveling at God’s provision.
  • Praying brings peace– like the clean and relaxed feeling you have after a good soak in the bath! And I hope that peace was reflected in the way we welcomed each child each day– in the way we listened, and in the way we spoke; in the way we encouraged, and in the way we taught; in the way we interacted with the children, and with the other volunteers.

We tend to “bathe” our “big concerns” in prayer. But what about our “little things?” What if we spent as much time praying about our next doctor appointment? Our next church service? Our next family outing?

We NEED prayer! Our efforts, without prayer, humility, and submission to the Spirit of the Lord, will be fruitless. With prayer, our lives, efforts, and plans will be clean, and bring Glory to God!

Just a thought– but if we bathed more things in prayer, we might just receive more “showers of blessing!”

My Father

One of my hobbies is genealogy. I have been tracing my ancestry (along with that of my husband and my in-laws) for many years. I am fortunate, in that I know who my parents, grandparents, and even great-grandparents were, when and where they were born, and when and where they died. Most my ancestors lived in the same area for at least five generations, some for seven or eight generations.

My great grandfather and his cousin, c. 1885

I know many others who struggle with genealogy, or have lost interest in “finding their roots.” Some are adopted, or their parents were adopted. The records have been sealed, or worse, lost, and they cannot find out even the name of a parent or grandparent to trace. Others have a murky and mysterious family history– someone in their family was illegitimate or born out of wedlock and no biological father can be confirmed.

Almost everyone who works on genealogy has, as one point, “hit a wall.” There are some people whose history is lost. They moved frequently, or they lived in a city or town where records were destroyed by fire or flood; some changed their name to avoid persecution or prosecution–some where enslaved and their names erased against their will; some lived at the edge of the wilderness, where few records were kept, and fewer still survived; some died young; some were illiterate, and left no written records. Many families have boxes or albums filled with unidentified (and unidentifiable) photos.

Some genealogists “hit gold.” They find in their family history a famous person from the past– a king or queen, military hero, chieftain, statesman, scientist, artist– some person of note. Often, however, these “finds” turn out to be red herrings. Early in my research, I thought I had stumbled on to a line of descent from one of the passengers on the Mayflower. How exciting! Except I had followed the wrong line. Two men of the same name in the same town had been born just two years apart. I had found the “right” name in a book about the Mayflower descendants, but it wasn’t actually the “right” one. A similar thing happened with the name of a signer of the Declaration of Independence. I even had a cousin who insisted that this signer was our direct ancestor. But it turned out to be incorrect. We WERE related to the signer, but not descended from him. It turns out he was a great-granduncle of our ancestor.

Human genealogy can be a rewarding pursuit, or a frustrating one. But our spiritual genealogy can be crystal clear, and is full of exciting news! Our Father is the King of Kings! We don’t have to wonder who He is or whether we will be accepted and listed as a family member. His grace extends to everyone who believes on Him– and it comes with the fullness of being His Children for all eternity.

My dad

When I pray to My Father, that is not just a polite or wishful phrase. God IS my father– just like my human father, only eternal and omnipotent! I have inherited various traits from both my fathers–creativity, wonder, curiosity, a sense of purpose and responsibility, love for others and for the world around me, love of music and nature, and a love of puns(!)–and I am an heir to all the riches of my Heavenly Father’s mercy and grace. I am a descendant of all the heroes of the Faith– not physically through human birth, but by spiritual re-birth– a daughter of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. All that God promised to them, He shares with me. Not because I deserve them, or could ever earn them; because He has made it so.

Father’s Day is coming up this Sunday. And it can be a time of reflection on our earthly fathers– their strengths, weakness, failures, and relationships. Father’s Day can bring many poignant memories, or waves of bitterness or regret. And looking into our long family history– if we can find it– may result in finding patterns of behavior that have led to pain or progress. But whatever your genealogy today–whether you know it, or take pride in it, or despair of it–you can live in the awe of being a beloved and privileged child of the King! And He wants to chat with you today! We have much to celebrate on Father’s Day if we reflect on our wonderful Heavenly Father!

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