Recipe for Prayer

I love to cook. I’ve been cooking for most of my life, and sometimes, I don’t use a recipe. Often, it’s a dish I’ve made so many times, I make it from memory. Other times, I’m adapting for ingredients I have, or substituting one cooking technique for another.

But I don’t recommend creating a new dish without a recipe or guideline. Cooking is a lot like chemistry– too much of one ingredient, or leaving out another one entirely, can result in disaster! You can’t just throw together a little of this and a little of that, cook it for who knows how long, and expect good results.

The same can be said for pursuing prayer as a lifestyle. I use a “recipe” for prayer. And yes, there are times when I vary from it. But a good, healthy prayer LIFE should contain the following four ingredients:

Praise/Worship/Adoration: After all, we are not praying to an unknown being with unknown qualities. We are praying to the One True God, whose marvelous attributes are worthy of unending praise. If I am praying regularly, and NOT praising God, what is the purpose of my prayer? It can devolve into a laundry list of my complaints, worries, wishes, and whims, instead of being a conversation between a child and her Beloved and Faithful Father.

Confession/Repentance/Review: This ingredient is a stumbling block for many people. If we have been forgiven, why do we need to confess or repent? God already knows our deeds, and Jesus’ death and resurrection have already removed our sins as far as the East is from the West, right? Right. But Confession is not about beating ourselves up over wrongs we cannot undo. Rather, it is simply agreeing with God about our condition and actions. Yes, Jesus has forgiven me. But I need to acknowledge who I am before Him. I am forgiven, not by being better than someone else, or even better than I was before, but because God has extended His Grace and Mercy. And if I don’t remind myself of this fundamental truth, I may forget, and begin to believe that I no longer “need” God’s mercy in my life.

Asking/Requests/Supplication: Supplication is an old word that means asking or pleading. Once again, this can be a stumbling block in a couple of different ways. As with confession, God already knows what we are going to ask. He already knows our needs. Saying them isn’t about making God aware; it’s about giving us a chance to seek HIS mercy, HIS will, and HIS answer. And it’s about acknowledging HIS sovereignty in all aspects of our life. I can’t count the number of times I have asked God for something, and realized that I was not really asking, but rather trying to dictate to God what I wanted to have happen. If I’ve started with the first two ingredients above, I quickly realize that, while God knows what is in my heart, He also knows what is best– and often that is much larger or better than I can imagine!

Thanksgiving/Responding/Yielding: The last ingredient in a healthy prayer life is a heart bursting with Thanksgiving and willing response to God’s Love and Care in my life. Prayer is, at heart, a conversation we have with God. And part of any good relationship is affirming that bond. If I talk with my friend, and even ask a favor, or share some of my burdens, I don’t just walk away without acknowledging how much their friendship and love mean to me– regardless of whether they respond immediately to my request. And I don’t listen to their loving advice and support and walk away as though they never spoke. Prayer should include a time of saying, “YES!” to our relationship with Jesus. YES, I trust you. YES, I gladly accept Your will and all the blessings You have provided in my life. YES, I will obey you and follow you!

Of course, every prayer and every pray-er is unique. Some prayers will have more asking than confessing; others will be “heavy” on Thanksgiving (especially those coming up later this month!). But it is good to stop and consider how the “ingredients” of prayer are producing a harvest in the way we live and the way we pursue a Godly lifestyle. For more about this topic, see https://www.dailyeffectiveprayer.org/prayer-acronym/ and also https://proverbs31mentor.com/acts-prayer/.

Nacho Prayers

Have you ever ordered nachos at a restaurant? I’m not talking about just tortilla chips with sauce– I mean the loaded, deluxe, supreme nachos that some with everything but the kitchen sink. There are several layers of goodness: crispy tortilla chips, smothered in rich, gooey nacho cheese sauce, and piled with spiced meat, tomatoes, green onion, black olives, salsa, chilies, beans, more cheese (shredded), maybe even some mango or avocado, and sour cream. Each flavor is distinct– different textures, different temperatures–yet they come together as they land on your taste buds. And each bite is just a little different– a different ratio of cheese to meat to veggies to chips in each taste.

And that means that my nacho is “not ‘cho” nacho. Even with all the same ingredients, my nacho experience will never be exactly the same as yours.

In a strange way, prayers are kind of like nachos. Prayers have many distinct “ingredients”– confession, praise, anguish, supplication, thankfulness, even questions. And many people can pray with the same ingredients and still offer up unique prayers. My prayer is “nacho” prayer– and your prayer is not mine; even when we are praying together about the same thing.

God loves the variety and uniqueness of our individual prayers. He never tires of “nacho” prayers. And He never compares my “nacho” prayers with yours, or your prayers with mine. Indeed, He loves tasting the individual ingredients in their unique ratio of flavors and elements. He loves hearing our gooey, cheesy emotions, as well as our crisp list of needs; He appreciates the savory outpouring of our praise, as well as the spicy and even bitter tang of our grief.

Can you imagine the tantalizing aroma of our prayers as they rise to Heaven? What satisfaction it brings to God as we pour out our thoughts and concerns to the One who loves us best? God isn’t looking for gourmet prayers. Our prayers may be neatly arranged or completely sloppy. They may contain lumps of worry, or be soggy with emotion; they may be spiced with urgency, or smothered in majestic outpourings of praise. God is still hungry to hear from us!

Why Say Grace?

When I was growing up, we always said grace before our meals. It wasn’t an afterthought; it wasn’t an affectation. It was just part of the meal. We sat down, said grace, and started eating. Sometimes, Dad did the honors; sometimes, it was Mom. And sometimes, my sister or I were asked to say it. It was usually something simple, though it wasn’t always the same. We would say grace at home, around our own table, and we would say grace at restaurants– wherever and whenever our family was together for a meal.

Today, my husband and I have the same tradition. We don’t have children in the house, but he and I take turns saying grace, and if one of the grandkids happens to visit, they know they may be asked to take a turn, as well. If David and I are eating out, we still take a quiet moment to hold hands, close our eyes, and say grace. Some times, other diners or wait staff will stare (or glare) or comment, but most of the time, they don’t even notice.

So why do we do it? Is it no more than force of habit? Are we just “holier” than other diners? Do we really think it impresses God if we say grace, or that God will be angry if we don’t say it?

No. But we believe saying grace is important. Here are some reasons why:

  • Grace is about gratitude. In our busy lives, it can be tempting to take things for granted– even things like food and family. We are BLESSED to have food to eat, and family with whom to share it. We are blessed when we go out to eat to have others cook and clean up for us. We are blessed whenever our family or neighbors can share a meal with us. God is a loving and gracious God, and grace is a time to remember our blessings.
  • Grace slows us down for just a minute to REMEMBER who we are, and who God is! All our blessings– including food and family and time to share them– come from God. Grace reminds us to be humble as well as thankful. It reminds us to see God’s hand at work in even the smallest and most mundane happenings in our lives. And it reminds us that God is faithful in all things, big and small.

  • Grace also helps us to remember to thank the people involved in our meals– the ability to buy groceries; the work it takes to prepare our food; friends and family who share our meals; neighbors who have given or traded with us for food; the cooks and wait staff that serve us at restaurants. Saying grace helps us SEE how we are interconnected; how we depend on God and on others in every area of our lives.
  • Grace gives us the opportunity to lift up our immediate worries and give them to God, instead of holding on to them. Grace is more than just a quick word about food. It is a time for us as a couple (or a family) to pray together about worries that are on our minds. Then, instead of being stressed as we eat, we can stay “in the moment” with each other, and enjoy mealtime together! It’s also a great way to share our thoughts, feelings, and concerns in a safe and informal environment. How much better mealtime is when stress and frustration are diminished, and joy and peace are given a seat at the table, instead!

Saying grace is much more than just a quaint habit from a bygone era. It is a vital part of our growth as individual Christians, and as a Christian couple. I believe it is a simple and quiet witness to others. I believe it has benefits for our digestion, our attitudes, and our emotions, as well.

Grace– not just the mealtime prayer, but the concept of Grace– is not loud or showy. It is, however, consistent, lovely, and powerful. May we say grace; may we show grace; may we live in the power of Grace today!

Processed Prayer

I love to cook. I love looking at new recipes, and finding new ways to use fresh ingredient, use up that last bit of leftovers, or stretch staple foods like beans, flour, or rice. And I love to pray. I love being able to lift up praises, requests, and even questions. I love knowing that I can confess even my most shameful thoughts or deeds to a God who already knows, loves me more than I can imagine, and stands eager to forgive me and strengthen me to make wiser choices.

Cooking can be exciting, challenging, and creative. But it doesn’t have to be. I don’t have to cook at all in our culture. I can (at some expense) dine out every day, and let someone else do all the work. Or, I can buy pre-made meals, “processed” foods and “instant” mixes– “just add water,” “cooks in 6 minutes,” “ready to eat.” I can pray “processed” prayers, too. I can recite prayers of others, mumble graces by rote, and even read off a list of requests with little or no effort or emotion.

But processed prayer isn’t healthy– no more than processed food. Oh, it won’t seem much different– at first. And it isn’t “bad”–every once in a while. But a steady diet of praying someone else’s words and thoughts doesn’t build a personal relationship. We miss out on the “process” of praying, and the end result is not as fresh and healthful.

When I cook from scratch, I have to follow a process:

  • I need to make sure I have the proper ingredients.
  • Some ingredients need to be seeded, skinned, peeled, chopped, or otherwise readied before they can be used.
  • Ingredients need to be added in the proper order.
  • Measurements are important. 1 teaspoon of salt is not the same as 1/2 cup of salt!
  • I need to use the proper methods– simmer, boil, chill, bake, etc.
  • Timing is crucial, too. Cookies may take 10 minutes to bake– a roast may take 3 hours.
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Praying “from scratch” also follows a process:

  • I have to have the right heart attitude.
  • Distractions need to be put aside.
  • I want to include all the “ingredients” of a deep prayer– Adoration and Praise; Acknowledging God’s Sovereignty and Power; Confession and Repentance; Thankfulness; Presenting my requests; Lifting up the needs of others; and Committing to Listen and Obey God.
  • Timing is important–I need to make time to visit with God in Prayer. It shouldn’t be an afterthought or another activity to squeeze in IF I have a chance!

That doesn’t mean that we can’t (or shouldn’t) pray “in the moment” or recite The Lord’s Prayer, or the Prayer of St. Francis, or another written prayer. It doesn’t mean that we should make all our prayers from a “recipe” or a formula. But if our prayer “diet” is becoming dependent on “processed” prayers, we may need to go back to the kitchen!

The Blessings of a Faithful Grandmother

Yesterday, my wonderful maternal grandmother would have celebrated her 110th earthly birthday. I have so many happy memories of times spent with her– of shared laughter and tears, walking barefoot through many yards and gardens, “overnights,” looking through her button tin, or her old jewelry box, helping her make homemade egg noodles, or cherry pie… But more than all these, I remember the feelings of peace, joy, and unconditional love whenever she was near.

My Grandmother, Beulah B.

Gram was one of the wisest persons I ever knew. She was patient and kind with everyone. I cannot remember ever hearing her say a spiteful or sarcastic word. She had a quiet sense of humor, and made everyone feel welcome and valuable. She was generous– not just with gifts, but with time and attention, especially for children. She was a hard worker, but she never seemed to look frenzied or “overworked.”

She and my grandfather were married for almost 63 years. She lived with him through many difficult times– during the Great Depression, there were many times when they could not be sure where they would live or what they would eat. Many nights were spent sleeping in spare rooms with family members. Grandad went to war in 1942, and Gram “held down the home front”– taking care of two little girls, and working the night shift as a riveter, while living with her parents. Things were better financially after the war, but Gram kept working– this time as a secretary. She and Grandad still moved around a lot–rented homes, apartments, mobile homes–each time making it look and feel better than it had ever been, or ever would be again. Gram planted flowers everywhere; Grandad collected animals. At the time of her death, Gram and Grandad were living in a rented house– the very house where Gram had been born 82 years earlier!

Gram’s given name was Beulah, named for her paternal grandmother. Her name means “married.” And Gram lived up to her name, and all it suggests. She was faithful, fruitful, and a wonderful companion and champion in her marriage. When she died, my grandfather was lost without her. We nearly lost him that very day. He only lived another four months after she passed.

If I had to choose a word to describe Gram, above all others, it would be faithful. She was faithful in everything she did– faithful to her marriage, faithful to her children and extended family, faithful at work, and faithful to God. Gram’s Bible was worn, and old, but she lived out its pages every day. Her trust in God was absolute– and it had been tested through all the hard times she had experienced. She KNEW she could trust in God’s provision and timing, because she had experienced it first hand. She did not make a fuss about her deep faith, nor did she ever deny the source of her peace and strength. Her life was not easy, but it was bountiful!

Today, as I reflect on her legacy, I am so grateful for her quiet example in my own life, and in the lives of others. I pray that I may leave such an impression before I pass on– that someone will be inspired to a lasting faith and find joy in their life’s journey because I have been faithful. Below is one of her favorite hymns: (I especially enjoy the piano in this clip, because it is close to how my Gram would have played it!)

Cooking Up Prayer

I love to cook. And it occurred to me that praying can be a lot like cooking:

Photo by Maarten van den Heuvel on Pexels.com
  • Prayers are made up of different ingredients–worship and adoration, confession, requests and supplication, thanksgiving, even questions..
  • Sometimes what we pray for, and the “finished product” of what God chooses to do don’t look or taste the same. But if we don’t “follow the recipe,” sometimes we end up with a disaster. Sometimes our thoughts and prayers are like adding a cup of salt, where we were supposed to add a cup of sugar! God knows the difference, and He adjusts accordingly!
  • There are many different “cooking” methods for prayer. Some prayers need to simmer–they take time and dedication; others “sizzle”– they are more immediate and urgent. There are even “raw” prayers– tortured cries of the heart. Some prayers are “cock pot” prayers– we give the matter to God and let it stew for quite awhile, only to see results much later.
  • Some prayers involve “heat”–we are either in hot water, or we are in a pressure cooker; maybe we’re half-baked! God doesn’t always turn down the heat– He knows just the right temperature for each situation, and He also knows when to remove us from the heat!
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Prayer is much more than a recipe or a even a good meal. But I hope we all take some time to “cook up” a healthy, satisfying prayer time today.

Photo by Gary Barnes on Pexels.com

About My Refrigerator

I am very thankful for my refrigerator. It’s used…we picked it up at a garage sale a couple of years ago. It still works well, except for the ice maker and water dispenser. But it has plenty of space, and it keeps things cold and/or frozen, as needed. Right now, we have some milk and plenty of eggs, cheese, and some leftovers, a jug of water getting chilled, some celery, and some fish thawing out for dinner later this week. There are also some random jars of condiments– catsup, mustard, mayonnaise, horseradish sauce, some diced garlic, a few pickles, and some jam. There are things that probably wouldn’t need to be refrigerated, but there they sit, nice and cold, ready if we need them. There are even a few leftovers that need to be taken out of the fridge and thrown out. Even the refrigerator can only preserve food for so long. There is a freezer, as well. It contains meat and veggies, and some blueberries I froze from earlier this summer. It is nearly full, and that’s another thing to be thankful for.

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For the past few weeks, I’ve been going through notes left by my great-grandmother. She was born before people had such luxuries. She started her married life with a cellar. Later, she had an icebox. Before she died, they had gotten an electric refrigerator, but it didn’t look much like mine. It was small, and had a small freezer, but it had to be defrosted regularly, and it didn’t have special drawers for vegetables or meat. Reading about her life has made me conscious of how easy my life is in comparison. I’m grateful for modern appliances, and conveniences– even as I often take them for granted. The stove, the microwave, the slow cooker (Crock Pot), the rice steamer, a food processor; they all save time and effort as I work in the kitchen. I still wash the dishes by hand, but even that is made easier with non-stick fry pans and plenty of hot water from the tap. My great-grandmother had to pump her water from the well and heat it over the fire!

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I’m not only thankful for what is IN my refrigerator, though. I am thankful for what’s ON it. I have dozens of magnets– some homemade, others souvenirs from various travels– here in Michigan, out West in Washington and Oregon, from the Dominican Republic, etc.. And each magnet holds something precious– photos of my grandkids, of nieces and nephews, of families serving on the mission field; drawings, Bible verses, business cards from favorite restaurants, memo pads, and inspirational quotes. It’s almost impossible to find the original surface of the fridge under all those important reminders! This is deliberate. The Bible tells us to keep His word in our hearts– to memorize it, and talk about it daily with our family.

4 Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Deuteronomy 6:4-9
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It’s “just” a refrigerator. But it is also a place of worship and thanksgiving and remembrance. Every time I open the door, I can be reminded of God’s power, love, and mercy; how much God has done for our family, and how we’ve been blessed. I am reminded of dear people, and reminded to lift them up in prayer. I am convicted of my need to be a better steward of the food and other resources we have been given. And I fill its shelves and drawers with love in the form of good food to share with my husband, and with our friends and neighbors. That refrigerator has been the repository of pies and deviled eggs, of fruit salads and 7-layer salads, of barbecued chicken and leftover corn pudding, and a hundred other dishes meant for family meals, potlucks, and simple dinners with my husband. At times, the shelves have been a little bare, but never empty. God provides! He blesses! He sustains!

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God can speak through something as simple as a kitchen appliance. Sometimes, we just have to take a moment to look and listen.

Prayer and Pizza-making

Maybe it’s just because I was hungry, but I started thinking about making a pizza from scratch, and how it can be like praying…I know it’s kind of a stretch, but stay with me..

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  • Faith/Crust–every pizza has to have a solid crust–and making crust from scratch usually involves stretching and pulling, flattening and forming it to make a round(ish) base for the toppings. Prayers rely on a solid foundation of faith. Even if it is a “thin” crust, faith is what gives us the confidence to approach God with our thoughts and thanks, our confessions and our concerns. Our faith is often stretched and pounded by circumstances, and it gets strengthened in the fires as God refines us.
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  • Salvation/Sauce– right there with the crust comes a sauce. It is usually red (tomato-based) or white (cream-based). I am reminded that our faith, and our ability to approach God freely is “covered” by the shed blood of Jesus Christ. Our sins, though scarlet, are made white as snow. Whatever weaknesses we have– even our small or weak faith, are “covered”– God pours and spreads His grace and salvation over us. Jesus advocates for us every time we pray.
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  • Content of our Prayers/Toppings–pizzas come in all types of varieties. I’ve had pizzas with goat cheese, tomatoes, onions, shrimp, smoked sausage, carrots, blueberries, ham, scrambled eggs, spinach, olives, gravy, cornmeal, mushrooms, grilled chicken, dried beef, taco meat, cocktail sauce…just not all on the same pizza! My point is that our prayers are as unique and individual as we are. Some of us pray “single topping” prayers– raising a special concern that God has laid on our heart– all day long, or for days or years on end. Some of us pray “scattershot” prayers– a little of this and a little of that as things come to mind. Some of us pray “house favorite” prayers– we follow a formula or a pattern in many of our prayers. But each prayer gives off a delicious aroma– each one has a unique combination of flavors, textures, and pleasing smells as they are offered up to the Father.
    And we prepare our toppings/our individual prayers…our thoughts may be chopped up, diced, sliced, and spread around. They may get layered and mixed up and melded.
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  • Meditation/Baking– I’ve had fruit and vegetable pizzas that are served “uncooked” (except usually the crust has been pre-baked), but most pizzas have to go in the oven before they can be eaten. Some prayers are spoken in public or “in the moment,” but God wants to spend some time alone with us– even if it is in a “hot” oven for just a few minutes! Taking time to immerse ourselves in God’s presence not only refreshes us, it gives us time and space and openness to hear God’s voice; to catch a glimpse of His vision for our day; to close our eyes and ears to distractions and false promises, guilt and self-justification.
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  • Reading/Recipe–great pizzas don’t just happen by trial and error. Even though I love to experiment with different toppings and different seasonings–even different crust variations–if I don’t follow a recipe, I can ruin an otherwise great pizza. If we’re not reading the Bible regularly, we can begin to fall into bad prayer habits– selfish or prideful prayers, praying in the wrong spirit (bitterness or anger), even praying in ways that don’t recognize God for who He is.
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  • Serving/Serving! Pizzas are not meant to be created and left to sit and grow cold or moldy. Prayers offered up without obedience and active service don’t nourish anyone. Prayer should nourish our souls– we should be strengthened, changed, and experience growth. And God is gracious. Even if our prayer life has grown “cold”– well, cold pizza is still really good!
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So build a great pizza/prayer today (and throughout the day). “Taste and see that the Lord is Good” (Psalm 34:8)! Come back tomorrow and repeat!

Prayer and Pizza

Have you ever looked at a pizza and thought– “Wow, this reminds me of prayer?!”  Me neither. But God works in mysterious, and sometimes mischievous, ways to teach us great lessons.  God is an awesome teacher, and he often uses parables, object lessons, and analogies to illuminate his truth and make it memorable and comprehensible.  God tends to use a lot of food-related analogies (bread and wine, fish, mustard seeds, vineyards and grapes, fatted calves, bitter herbs, yeast, and salt…), likely because he knows that the way to our hearts and minds is often through our taste buds!

So yesterday, as I was thinking about prayer (and listening to my stomach rumble a bit), I sat down to write, and I was suddenly thinking about how prayer is kind of like a pizza– a wonderful, freshly made pizza.  The same ingredients that make a great pizza should help us build a great prayer life.

Every good pizza starts with dough.  Every good prayer starts by recognizing our “knead” to rest on God’s grace, his promises, his timing, his strength, and his love.  Whether your dough yields a traditional yeast and flour crust, a matzoh wafer, a cauliflower thin crust, a deep dish corn meal extravaganza, a flaky biscuit-dough crust, or even a culinary experiment, it provides a base for all the other ingredients.  I could get side-tracked into an entire blog just about the crust analogies (three-ingredient, yeastless crust: Holy Trinity?  self-rising crust: resurrection? round crust: eternity?  pray without ceasing?  crusts that are tossed, pressed, rolled out, or put on the rack?), but I’ll let that sit there and go on to the toppings.

One of the wonderful things about pizza is the endless combination of toppings.  Prayer can be just as unique as the person and occasion involved.  Some prayers are simple two- or three-ingredient prayers.  Some are piled on with praise or loaded with concerns.  Some prayers include ingredients that are sweet, or bitter, or crushed, or salty.  Some prayers are meaty, some are fruity, some are cheesy, and some are saucy.

food-pizza-restaurant-eating.jpg  pexels-photo-367915.jpeg

But ah…the aroma!  And the final product!  Something miraculous happens when simple (or complex) ingredients combine on the crust and come through the heat.  God takes our worries, our praises, our confessions, our remembrances, our groaning, and our rejoicing, and turns them into something supernatural and mysterious.  He compares our prayers to an aroma (like incense, not precisely pizza, but..) rising to Heaven.  Tangy, pungent, comforting, or mouth-watering, our prayers become satisfying, nourishing, powerful, and enticing, beyond what our mere words could ever produce.

The next time you make a pizza (or order one)–thank God for his gift of the food you eat– but remember to thank him for the miracle of prayer as well.

Buon Appetito!

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