My Body, My Choice?

The news is constantly filled with stories about women (and men and children) who want to have complete control over their bodies– they want to choose their gender, dramatically change their appearance, and determine when (or if) they will have children, commit to relationships, or accept the responsibility that comes with having a body.

In many ways, “my body, my choice” seems reasonable and even fair. No one wants other people to have control over their life and death, or their health and welfare, with no say and no choice. But often, this phrase is twisted into a fantasy that every person can do whatever s/he wants with their body, without accepting the consequences or responsibilities that come with their behavior or their natural abilities.

I once saw an online argument in which a young and earnest writer boldly claimed that “bodily autonomy is a ‘thing.'” They went on to argue that ‘bodily autonomy’ gave them the right to government-funded abortion on demand, access to puberty blockers, the right to identify as whatever gender (or species) they felt like, all without restriction or ‘judgment’ by anyone else. What? “Bodily Autonomy” is a phrase, suggesting that a person has the right to control or “own” their own body, and not answerable to any other authority, law, or limitation. But being a ‘thing’ doesn’t make ‘bodily autonomy’ a reality. I can make many choices about my body– but there are many realities over which I have no “choice”– no control or authority or resources to accomplish.

I’m short. I cannot suddenly become tall. I am a woman. No matter how many hormones I pump into my body, no matter how many surgeries I could have to make me look or sound like a man, or “function” somewhat like a man, I will never have a man’s body or a man’s DNA. I am barren. The idea that pregnancy was always a “choice” for me denies the very real emotional struggle I went through in accepting my body’s limitations. I recently lost a sister-in-law to cancer. What a mockery to chant “my body, my choice!’ to someone who is dying of cancer or who was born with cystic fibrosis or is battling ALS or multiple sclerosis. And sometimes, other people violate our bodies– we may struggle, but we cannot prevent someone else from abusing us physically or sexually. So, although bodily autonomy may be a “thing” or an ideal, it is not a guarantee. And if the choices we make in our body end up abusing, hurting, or killing another living being, that is not autonomy– it’s unjust and predatory.

But what does the Bible say? Does God give us choices about our bodies?

There is nothing specific in the Bible about gender dysphoria, or plastic surgery. There is no mention of third trimester abortion or modern feminism, or queer lifestyles. But there are many teachings about our bodies AND our choices. And surprisingly, the Bible does NOT say that we have no control or “rights” over our own bodies. Instead, the Bible tells us the following:

God is the creator of all life. Life is a gift from God, not a random accident. And no one– NO ONE– can spontaneously come into being. So, the idea of “bodily autonomy” cannot be true of anyone who has ever depended on someone else to be born or to grow up or to become pregnant. God’s word makes it clear that “autonomy” is NOT the goal of creation. God’s purpose for us is to connect– with Him and with each other. He created men and women different, yet complementary. He created families to live and work together– the old teaching the young, as the young care for the old–sharing and building a legacy. Sin corrupts God’s design– it seeks to subvert it and destroy it, replacing it with a twisted independence that leads to isolation and loneliness, distrust, anger, pride and hatred.
God doesn’t make mistakes. He doesn’t delight in our struggles, our limitations, or our diseases. But Sin corrupts– right down into our DNA. God does not wipe out the consequences of Sin in our world– not yet. Someday, He will bring an end to all the causes of suffering, confusion, and grief. But in the meantime, He promises to be present WITH us THROUGH the struggle. We may not understand fully how our bodies work or why they do (or don’t do) what we might like. We may wonder why we look the way we do, or why our nose is “too small” or our body is shaped like a pear, when we want it to be an hourglass, or our hair in impossible to keep tamed, or we face a family history of oversized ears. We may struggle with diabetes, asthma, epilepsy, hypothyroidism, and even gender dysphoria. But God isn’t sitting in the wings, laughing at our circumstances. He promises to be both “present” and “sufficient,” even in the midst of our pain and uncertainty.
God calls us to take care of the bodies He gave us to the best of our ability. That means it is sinful to have indiscriminate sex with unknown partners who may be carrying venereal diseases– and also to overeat or starve ourselves with fad diets, or to pierce ourselves with unclean needles, whether getting a tattoo from an unlicensed and unclean parlor, or shooting up with heroin. Sexual and gender issues grab headlines and make for great political fodder, but we can make the mistake of thinking that such sins are “bigger” than lying or gossip or greed or pride, or that they are unforgiveable– they are NOT! God can remove the stain of abortion, rebellion, gossip, addiction, lying, drunkenness, body shaming, and judgmentalism.
God HAS given us the power of choice– we can choose our behaviors, our lifestyle, our morals, and our relationships. He has also given us governments to create laws and punishments for those who break them. But a law doesn’t actually prevent you from doing an act– it merely outlines the negative consequences for breaking that law. Laws can’t prevent people from committing murder, rape, theft, arson, etc., but laws provide a framework for responsibility and punishment to discourage certain behaviors and affirm the rights of even the most vulnerable among us. In other words, a law can’t prevent you from having an abortion or a sex change– but it can limit your ability to do so by forcing you to face negative consequences– jail time, higher fees, fewer practitioners willing to make such decisions “easy” and socially acceptable. God has given us His law in the Bible to show us how far we have fallen away from His standards and His character. On our own, we will never fulfill the entire law. But that is the heart of the Gospel– Jesus came to free us from both the power of Sin and the condemnation that comes from yielding to it. The Holy Spirit can give us the power to make Godly choices, knowing that Christ’s atoning sacrifice has paid the price for our sinful choices of the past.
Our choices come with consequences. We are ‘free’ to make bad choices, but we (and others!) are not free of the consequences of our choices. “My body, my choice” is an anthem of entitlement– of rights without responsibilities. Many of our choices carry great risks. Abortion is not a risk-free solution to a “problem.” Just as pregnancy presents risks, so does the medical procedure to end one. Clinics can minimize the risks, but there is no such thing as a guaranteed “safe escape” from an unplanned pregnancy. Sex change operations are even riskier, with complications that can be profound, chronic, and extremely painful. Risky health and sex habits don’t become any less risky just because they are legal or socially accepted. Experimenting with drugs can end in tragic death or lifelong damage to the heart or brain, as well as the horrors of addiction. Eating or drinking in excess will still lead to health problems, even if there is a new miracle fad drug that masks the early symptoms.
Sin has consequences that are often NOT of our making or choosing. It is not fair, it is not just, and it is not your fault. Punishing an innocent person will not take away that fact. It only spreads the consequences of Sin to someone else– someone who will be another innocent victim– YOUR victim. Cutting off family and friends because they don’t “affirm” your new lifestyle will not change them. It will hurt them. It will hurt you. It will not make your lifestyle any more acceptable to them. Aborting a baby will not change the circumstances of the pregnancy or make the abuse or memories of a rape disappear. Someday, God will restore justice, reward hope, and remove all grief and pain for those who learn to trust Him.

In the end, God has given you “your” body, and He has given you “your” choice. But He also warns you of the consequences of making selfish, dangerous choices that can result in death, heartbreak, regrets, and long-term damage for short-term benefits. He also promises the blessings of recognizing that “your” soul was made to have a relationship with a Holy and Perfect God, and that your “choice” to follow Him will bring eternal and glorious benefits, including a new and sinless “body” in Heaven. I pray that I will make good choices to take care of “my body” today. And I pray that eyes and minds will be opened to the wonder of God’s gift of life, and His plan for every “body” around me.

October 16, 2026 0

What’s That Smell?!

Years ago, when I worked in a public library, one of my jobs was to help empty the book drop. Most libraries have a large receptacle outside the building where people can drop off their books after hours. We had a “drive up” drop box, and the large bins would get full– especially over a holiday weekend! It was important to empty them out and get the books checked back in– and to check for damage.

I was always amazed at the state of some of our returned books. We were located near several beaches along Lake Michigan, and many of our books would return with sand trapped in the plastic covering (and between the pages) of many books. Some books came back with torn or dog-eared pages. Some had been marked with pens, crayons, or markers. Some books came back with unusual “bookmarks,” including utility bills, photos, letters, and even credit cards and drivers’ licenses!

But the worst one I can remember happened on a Tuesday morning after Labor Day weekend. There was a plastic shopping bag, tightly knotted at the top, containing two books. And it smelled HORRIBLE. It smelled like swamp water and mildew and dead animal! Inside, the two books were not just mildewed– they had mold growing in them. The books were almost a month overdue, but they were damaged beyond all repair, and I needed to call the borrower to let them know we would be charging a book replacement fee.

The story came out– I talked to the mother. Her daughter had taken library books to Summer Camp, and they had gotten wet after a rainstorm. Not wanting her clothes or other items to get wet, the girl had placed the books in the plastic bag. Summer Camp ended, and she packed everything–including the still-damp books inside the shopping bag– and brought them home. Somehow, the bag with the books ended up under her daughter’s bed, where they stayed for three more weeks! In the meantime, the mother had received an overdue notice from the library and couldn’t find the books. Certain that they had been returned, she had called the library to complain about “our” mistake. Several staff members had combed the shelves, trying to find the missing books, but hadn’t seen them.

Summer was coming to an end, and the girl in question was cleaning her room, which had begun to smell. She found the bag with her two missing library books– the source of the smell. Totally embarrassed, the mother brought the bag to the library book drop and threw it in, so she wouldn’t have to face us in person. She apologized profusely over the phone, and happily agreed to pay the replacement fee the next time she came in.

What does all of this have to do with prayer and worship?

Well, it’s a long and winding story, but here is my thought process today: It’s getting ready to rain. We have a small leak, and a bucket that catches the rainwater in our hallway. Water that drips into the bucket and stands for a few days will get fetid. That got me thinking about living water. Living water is described throughout the Bible– and it is always moving– flowing, rolling, gushing, pouring, etc., which reminded me of a verse in the book of Amos–“But let justice roll on like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream” Amos 5:24 (NIV). But as I was looking at this verse in context, I was arrested by the verses just above–Amos 5:21-25 “I hate, I despise your religious festivals; your assemblies are a stench to me.Even though you bring me burnt offerings and grain offerings, I will not accept them. Though you bring choice fellowship offerings, I will have no regard for them.Away with the noise of your songs! I will not listen to the music of your harps. But let justice roll on like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream!” (emphasis added).

God isn’t just mildly offended when we neglect justice, obedience, compassion, and truth. He calls the empty festivals of the wayward Israelites a “stench”– a nose-twisting, swoon-inducing, stinking, reeking, sweltering offense that causes the eyes to water and the whole body to convulse with repugnance!

And what had caused the festivals and religious assemblies of the Israelites to become a stench? They were following the rules for burnt offerings. They were singing songs and fellowshipping together. But it was all about THEM. They were not elevating and worshipping God, but worshipping idols dedicated to the stars and the sun and the moon. And they would leave the assembly unmoved, unchanged, and continuing in their wicked ways. They oppressed the poor and innocent and ignored the very God they claimed to serve.

Suddenly, my memory of the stench of those books attached itself to the condition of complacent, and even false worship as it was described by Amos. Those moldy books had been thrown into a convenient bag and then forgotten. They were ignored, shoved under a bed and returned late, shamefully treated, and falsely claimed as returned. Just like God’s people had treated His word, His commands, and His promises.

Water– rain water, river water, spring water–if it is allowed or even forced to sit still, can lose its freshness and stop giving life. Justice, righteousness, mercy– are all supposed to roll like water– they are meant to be shared, pursued, and spread. When we withhold justice, hoard mercy, compromise on obedience, make worship about spectacle and feelings instead of honor and true praise, we stagnate. Our testimony begins to stink. Our lives spill over with selfishness, bitterness, and apathy. When our praise becomes automatic, OR it becomes more about the spectacle than the Spirit– it will also stagnate and smell “off.”

As the rains arrive, I want to remember that God sends Living Water, not just to fill my cup, but to spill over and bring life to others, and glory to Himself.

Nothing smells like the freshness after a spring rain! And THAT’S the aroma I want to give back to God in my prayer time, my worship, and in my life!

June 17, 2026 0

Out of the Blue

There is an English phrase for something that happens completely unexpectedly; we say that “it came out of the blue.” I thought I understood that phrase, but I got a deeper understanding this past Friday. My husband and I were in Elkhart, Indiana, just across the border from our home county in Michigan. We often drive the 20 miles or so to Elkhart for shopping, banking, eating out, and more. The weather was surprisingly warm and humid for March, with a light breeze and blue skies dotted with light gray clouds. David and I had eschewed both coats and jackets for the day– nearly unheard of for this time of year in our area.

But as we prepared to return home, we noticed that the gray clouds to the north of us had grown darker and heavier. And lower. Still, there was blue sky above us and to the south. It wasn’t raining and there was only a light breeze. We were listening to a radio talk show, which was suddenly interrupted by a high-pitched alarm. The announcer said that there was a tornado warning for our county– the one we were driving through!– and that we should be looking for rain and hail, strong winds, and possible tornadic activity.

We searched the skies– the same clouds we had seen in the north looked darker than normal, but we experienced no strong winds and no rain. About a mile later, we saw evidence that it had rained recently, but otherwise, it was calm. The sky above us was blue. Birds were singing. The air seemed fresh and calm. Still, the weather alert kept giving details. A tornado warning was in effect for the next 35 minutes for our county and the one directly east of us. But we kept driving. A couple of miles later, we saw a small patch of damage– a few twigs and dead leaves had blown across the road in one spot. The evidence of rain became clearer– there were large puddles. We drove through some of the area that had been mentioned in the alert– we skirted Edwardsburg, Diamond Lake, and Cassopolis. We saw small spots of rain and wind damage, and we came into some rain that was still falling, but it was gentle. Behind us to the south and west, the skies were blue.

When we arrived home, we looked at the recent news posts. We were shocked to see that several houses on either side of our path had been touched by hail and tornadoes just before came home, and that tornadoes were still doing damage to the east– in the town where our son lives! We watched as video footage showed the grocery store where I had shopped just days ago losing parts of its roof, while the DIY store across the street lost its entire roof and some of the west wall! Power lines were down, cars and small buildings were being lifted, twisted, and thrown back down on the ground. This was only a mile from our son’s house! And now, our cell phones weren’t working, so we couldn’t call him to see if he was ok. And our skies were blue–someone close by even posted pictures of rainbows!

It turned out our son and his home were fine– they were out of power for a few hours, but no damage to the roof or house or vehicles. Some of my cousins, who also live in that city reported on-line that they were also safe. Whew!

Long story– scary afternoon and evening– but it got me thinking. We were right at the edge of a dangerous storm path, and without the radio warning, we would have concluded that there had been no more than a rain shower around us. Had we been traveling just a few minutes earlier, we might have been taken unawares. This storm came with very little warning, and did a lot of damage, yet people were going about their daily lives– unprepared and unaware of the danger.

Tornadoes are scary because they often come like that– with little warning, and little way of predicting how strong or fast or dangerous they will be. But how many other things in life hit us “out of the blue?” A heart attack, an auto accident, a house fire–suddenly our life spins out of control. How will we react?

After the first shock, we can become lost in the immediate chaos– everything we depend on can vanish in an instant. “Out of the blue” we can lose our health, our job, our home, our relationships, our bank account, and anything else where we find our security. OR, we can rediscover our strength, our hope, and our trust in a God who is more powerful than a tornado; more solid and eternal than any building, and constantly aware of our circumstances– whether we are enjoying blue skies or looking at threatening clouds from the ruins of our family home.

I am praying for the families who were impacted by the recent storms– especially those families who lost homes or loved ones. I can’t offer the comfort of knowing why this happened, or what exactly will come next. But I can offer the hope of knowing the One who knows all things, and whose love is greater than anything else we could ever trust.

Sometimes, bad things come “out of the blue.” Bad things happen to people– not just “bad” people, or “good” people–for reasons that make no earthly sense. But such things, like tornadoes, pass away, die out, leave their mark, or move on. And if we look again, we will be able to see the “blue” sky– the good things that remain, and the hope of renewal.

March 9, 2026 0

Where Does My Help Come From?

I read an on-line article the other day https://www.verywellhealth.com/perils-of-using-the-internet-to-self-diagnose-4117449 about people using the internet to find medical information, rather than seeing a doctor. The article focuses on self-diagnosis, and the dangers of using only on-line sources to diagnose and treat a chronic medical condition. But I was astonished to note that over two-thirds of American adults (according to various studies) are using the internet to get at least some of their medical advice, and many of them prefer to get their medical information in this way. Why is this?

I think there are several factors, many of which are not discussed in the article:

Convenience–The internet is easy, quick, and convenient. I can look up medical terms, symptoms, treatment options, find testimonials and comparisons of various medications and procedures all at the touch of a few buttons, all from the privacy of my own home. I can stay in my pajamas!
Cost (in both time and money)– I can save hours of sitting in waiting rooms and thousands of dollars by seeking help from the internet. I don’t need to “waste” time or money on multiple appointments in multiple locations with multiple specialists. I don’t need to spend more on medication if the internet offers alternative treatments.

“Confirmation Bias”– the article does discuss the idea that using the internet often helps us achieve a sense that we “know” ourselves better than our health care provider– that the information on the internet can be customized to confirm our already-held beliefs about what is wrong and how to treat it. And we can find on-line groups and sites that will confirm and support whatever we already believe about our health or treatment options, or steer us toward a course of treatment that more closely aligns with our established preferences and habits.
Community–One of the positive points about using the internet is that we can connect with a community of others who also suffer from similar chronic conditions. We can receive support and advice from people near and far, and connect with resources that would otherwise be unknown to us, given by those who seem to understand and sympathize.
Credibility–The article does NOT go into much detail about this, but many Americans (and I suspect others) no longer have a blind trust in the medical profession. Even once respected institutions, such as the National Institutes of Health, the Center for Disease Control, and the World Health Organization have lost much of their status and credibility due to their handling of COVID and other recent medical crises. We no longer trust the “experts” to give us the best medical advice. We are looking for someone (anyone) who seems to have a better answer–one that doesn’t require us to trust where we have felt disappointed or hurt.

Of course, this poses danger and risk to anyone who is trying to “go it alone” in their medical journey. We risk getting it wrong and causing more harm– even risking our lives. We may end up spending more time, energy, and money “fixing” the damage we cause by trusting the wrong people, and end up confused, frustrated, and angry at ourselves and everyone else we trusted to help us. Even “support” groups have been known to give false encouragement and even prey on people or families who are struggling with chronic illness.

But this article also reminded me that we can risk our spiritual health in the same way– going it alone instead of getting connected to a local church, or substituting on-line articles and blogs (even this one!) for daily personal prayer and Bible study. How does this happen, and WHY?

Do we find it more convenient to pick and choose our counsel from the abundance of resources available on-line? Do we only want to read or listen to those who tell us what we want to hear? (See 2 Timothy 4:3-5)

Are we trying to “cut corners” in the cost of being a Christian? Do we find it too much to spend time in church, wrestle with questions, accept correction from others, or ask for help?
Are we worried about “fitting in” or are we trying to create a “holy huddle” of like-minded people, regardless of our call to be part of the “Body of Christ?” (see 1 Corinthians 12:12-30)
Have we lost faith in the Church because of past encounters with others, or the attacks of unbelievers? Do we find it easier to “customize” our spiritual life, closing ourselves off from the kind of challenges that cause us to grow, and falling into a comfortable compromise?

The internet can be a wonderful tool, allowing us to share encouragement, testimonies, warnings, and valuable information globally with a few keystrokes! But it is not without risks. Ultimately, we need to trust, not the makers of websites, or the self-proclaimed “experts” of the world, but in the Sovereign God– the Maker of Heaven and Earth, the one who holds the future of our health (both physical and spiritual) in His Almighty Hands!

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)

I lift my eyes toward the mountains.
Where will my help from from?
My help comes from the LORD,
The Maker of heaven and earth.
Psalm 121:1-2

My prayer today is that we would look beyond the mountains of information we find on the internet, and fix our sight and our trust in God for our daily bread, our health, and our future. May we rely on His wisdom to help us seek the right counsel, and to learn, even from our sufferings, that His Presence and His Promises are eternal, sufficient, and sure!

August 28, 2023 0

Souvenirs or Baggage?

My Mom died recently, and my brother and sister and I are cleaning out her estate. This is by no means a small task, as my Mother saved EVERYTHING! All of our elementary school report cards, 4-H Awards programs, class play programs, thousands of photos (mostly unidentified), post cards from all of our vacations (including places we re-visited!), ticket stubs from movies and football games and banquets, our old baby shoes, broken toys, recipes clipped from magazines and old boxes, letters we sent from college, and letters sent to her when she was in high school. She even saved such things that her own mother and grandmother had saved! Souvenirs and memories, all tucked away or piled up throughout her house.

My mom was what is known as a “hoarder.” She was pathological in her collecting bits and pieces of everything that went on all around her. She had clothing she had never worn. She had Christmas gifts she had opened and put back in their wrapping, but never enjoyed. She had books she had never read, DVDs she had never watched, and pots and pans she had never used. She had stacks and bags and boxes of memories she always meant to sort through– someday.

As she grew older, she sometimes would lament that we, as her children, would be burdened with the job of sorting through all her “stuff.” Even so, she wouldn’t let us touch any of it until the last months of her life, when it was obvious that she would never be able to do it herself. And we weren’t to throw anything out– only make an attempt to organize it all!

Of course, now we are throwing out the majority of what she kept. Much of it was damaged by being stacked and stored in the haphazard way it was. Some was damaged by a leaky roof, or mice. Many of the things that are damaged were once useful, and might have been useful yet if they had not been hoarded and held back. Blankets and towels that might have been passed on were left to be chewed up or rotted. Books and photos are warped or stained.

I loved Mom, and she was a great woman of God– a prayer warrior and evangelist. But she was human. In this part of her life, she missed some great opportunities to bless others with the resources she had. She even missed the opportunity to enjoy many of the things she obsessively stored for “someday.” Moreover, she saved many things that weren’t useful. Old boxes and jars of spoiled food, old bills and advertisements, expired credit cards and driver’s licenses.

I have been reminded of many things as I’ve helped go through Mom’s “things.” There are many wonderful memories that still can be found in all of her souvenirs. I found an old storybook– one of my favorites–about a Mama Bear and her naughty, curious little cub. “Why do you love me?,” the cub asks after getting into trouble yet again. “Because you’re my little bear,” she answers as she cleans the wounds and lovingly carries her cub home. Love transcends mischief. It transcends things like lost opportunities and hoarding tendencies, and the frustrations of life.

But sometimes we hang on to things, not out of love, but out of pain or desperation. Mom was a child of the Great Depression. Her family had to move a lot when she was younger. She was forced to give away toys and clothes she wanted to keep; forced to leave old friends and make new ones; forced to make things “last” when new things couldn’t be had. She spent many years having to be frugal and careful to make small memories last a lifetime. She became obsessed with collecting “souvenirs” of even the smallest events, even tragic ones, and holding on to what was “good enough,” even if something better was offered.

Photo by Carlo Ju00fcnemann on Pexels.com

Many of Mom’s “souvenirs” have become baggage for those of us who follow. And many of our “souvenirs” will be baggage for those who follow us. Some of our scars will be passed down to our children. Some of our hopes and dreams will be unrealized–unopened and unused gifts that “might have been.” Others objects and experiences will be pleasant reminders of the love that lasts beyond our own lives and limitations. But objects, in themselves, cannot take the place of the actual experiences of joy, love, and peace they are meant to represent.

God wants us to hold fast to certain things. Truth. Hope. Love. Faith. But He calls us to let go of other things. Bitterness, resentment, anger, self-pity. I know that in my final days, I will probably find that I am still carrying some baggage. But I hope that I will find more souvenirs– good memories of a life enjoyed, goals accomplished, and relationships that have stood the test of time. Mom had those in abundance. But some were hidden among the baggage–treasured memories of those who loved her, and those whom she loved, surrounded by the baggage of heartache and longing. I pray that those who follow me won’t have to search among the ruins to find my souvenirs, or hunt through piles of souvenirs to find my treasures.

May 3, 2023 0

Tag: damage

My Body, My Choice?

What’s That Smell?!

Out of the Blue

Souvenirs or Baggage?

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