
Have you ever been puzzled by prayer? Prayer is very mysterious. It’s difficult to explain how it “works.” I ask God to do something– sometimes I ask for very specific things. And if God chooses, He sends me exactly what I have asked for. But what if He doesn’t? Does that mean that He didn’t hear? Or does it mean that I am “out of favor” with Him? If God answers a very specific prayer, is it because I prayed for that specific answer or would He have done it anyway? Does my prayer change God’s plans, or does God cause me to pray what He wanted to do from the start? I can’t give a definite answer, because God’s ways are NOT my ways. I don’t fully understand how prayer operates.
But I don’t have to puzzle about prayer. I don’t have to analyze and dissect the various elements of prayer or of God’s Sovereign will in order to pursue prayer. Prayer has very little to do with any of the variables I can understand or control. Prayer is communicating (hopefully in an intimate and worshipful way) with a Sovereign and Holy God. If I could figure out the “how” I would not so treasure the WHO!

There are some guidelines, however, that make prayer a bit less puzzling and more practical:
- Prayer isn’t about ME. I don’t have to be perfect, or eloquent, or righteous in order to call out to God. His answers don’t depend on who I am (status) or what I’ve done (performance). He doesn’t “grade on a curve,” and He doesn’t have favorites. “Whosoever” is a word that comes up often in Christ’s teachings, and I need to remember that NOTHING can separate me from the Love of Christ (see Romans 8:38-39), and ONLY Christ has made that possible (see John 15:5 and Acts 4:12)
- Prayer isn’t about me, but it is FOR me. God already knows my thoughts, feelings, and attitudes. But He invites me to pray, so that WE can enjoy a relationship. God can survive and thrive without me, but I can’t live an abundant (and certainly not an eternal) life without Him. We were created to live in relationship– with others and with Him– and you can’t have a relationship without communication. And you can’t have a fulfilling relationship if the communication is only one-sided! God communicates with us in many ways– He’s given us His Word, He sends us the Holy Spirit, and He sends wisdom and encouragement through other people. But prayer is our way of responding! Browse through the Psalms and see how deeply personal prayer can be!
- Prayer ISN’T transactional. Because prayer is meant to be relational, it is deep and personal– not shallow and transactional. In other words, it isn’t about WHAT I’m praying for or WHAT God gives in response. It is about sharing WHO we are– prayer may or may not answer my immediate circumstances, but it WILL answer (eventually and satisfactorily) the cry of my heart and allow me to know God more fully. While I can keep a record of how and when God has provided answers to my prayers, to remind me of His tender care or to encourage me as I face new challenges, I do not need to keep a “scorecard” of God’s answers– it is not a competition or a power play.
- Because prayer is not transactional, it’s not really about the results. Of course, that is what we, in our lack of knowledge and understanding, can point to and keep track of, but Faith causes us to “see” the results that don’t yet exist (see Hebrews 11:1 and 6), and have confidence that God WILL act according to His Holy character and perfect will (see Hebrews 11:39-40). We pray BEYOND what we can see and know, because God is greater than our circumstances!
- Prayer isn’t a procedure; it is a process and a pursuit. Because prayer is part of an ongoing and deepening relationship with God, it is never finished. We may say “Amen” at the end of each prayer, but really, prayer is a continuing conversation, not a task to complete. God may not answer a single “chat” when He wants to develop a conversational thread or an ongoing discussion.
- God’s ways and plans are mysterious and majestic in ways my mind cannot grasp. I can puzzle and protest and whine about what God chooses to do, and when and how He chooses to do it, but I cannot tell Him how or when or why He MUST do anything. Because I can only guess at outcomes and results. God KNOWS. And even when His ways don’t seem to make sense, I can trust Him, not because I know the answers, but because I know HIM!
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