When “Mother’s Day” Hurts

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Yesterday was Mother’s Day here, celebrating and honoring the mothers in our lives. Mother’s Day can be a wonderful day of celebration.  But it can also be one of the most painful days of the year.  Millions of women each year face acute heartbreak on this day– instead of celebration, they face the haunting memories of abandonment or separation, infertility, miscarriage, infant deaths, broken relationships, missed opportunities, regrets, suicide, and the loss of their own mothers.  There are no cheery greeting cards or perky flower baskets that can erase that kind of gut-wrenching pain– no pithy words or consolation gift that makes this day easy or comfortable.

I have an awesome mother-in-law, the world’s best sister, world-class sisters-in-law, a remarkable step-daughter, daughter-in-law, granddaughter, and a host of other wonderful women in my life.   I love being an auntie, step-mom, daughter-in-law, (step) grandma, great-aunt, and great-grand-aunt! I love that I am still in touch with former students and story hour kids, Sunday School and Bible School attendees, and others I have had the honor to mentor.  So I celebrate Mother’s Day and honor those people and all the ways their lives have impacted mine, and (hopefully) my life has connected with theirs.

But none of that chases away the ache of never having a child of my own– never knowing the joy of tucking my own child into bed; never being able to kiss away a boo-boo or a bad dream and say the words, “Mommy loves you.”  None of that will bring back my beloved mom or grandma my favorite aunts, mentors and friends who are gone.  I miss them more each year; I miss their wisdom, their strength, their comfort.

Maybe because of my own experience, I’m more attuned to it, but I see and hear a lot of pain around this time each year.  My heart goes out to all of the women with empty arms– the women who had to bury a huge chunk of their heart along with a child they can never hold; the women who had to say goodbye to the only one who could ever reassure them that, “Mommy loves you.”

My prayer today is that you would know that even in those moments when your heart is crushed, and your arms ache to hold or be held, that you are not alone; you are not forgotten.  God knows the aching loss of seeing his only son on the cross as he took his last gasping breath before he died.  Jesus experienced the sting of rejection from the people who should have called him brother, and “Father.”  Throughout the Bible, God gave us examples of women (Eve, Sarah, Hagar, Rebecca, Leah, Rachel, Hannah, Elizabeth, Mary and others) who knew the ache of barrenness, rejection, strife, and loss of children.  God saw their pain; he heard their cries of distress and their prayers.  He sees you too.  He hears you.  He loves you beyond anything you can imagine, and beyond where any grief, guilt, or despair can take you.

More than this, he has promised to be close to the poor in spirit, those who mourn, the broken-hearted, and to those who need rest and comfort.  He promises his presence, and he promises to turn our mourning into joy and bring us peace.  He is eager to restore us, to renew our strength, and to reassure us that we are loved with an everlasting love.  God created us in his image– and that includes the image of a mother hen gathering chicks, It includes the image of Mary who wrapped the God of the Universe in swaddling cloths and tucked him into a manger of hay, and who watched as that same God of the Universe died for her.

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God knows the passion, the pain, and the pure love of a woman’s heart– even when “Mother’s Day” hurts.

“Thy Will Be Done”

At the age of 14 months, just after I had learned to walk well, and had learned to say “Mama” and “Da-da”, I became very ill.  Our doctor was baffled– I was tired and weak, I was losing weight, but I wasn’t carrying a fever.  It wasn’t any of the “usual” culprits– we did find out I was allergic to penicillin, but other antibiotics had no effect.  We tried a different doctor– he was also stumped, and all the while, I got weaker.  My desperate parents prayed for healing as the weeks went on.  I was too little to even describe any symptoms– I whimpered and slept; I ate very little, and became too weak to walk.

God was listening to my parents’ prayers, even though the situation seemed impossible and tragic, and God seemed silent and distant.  My mother, in the years since this incident, has shared with me the “breakthrough” moment for her– that moment when her prayers changed from “heal my little girl”, to “thy will be done.”  Not immediately, but shortly after that, the new doctor was inspired to look for another cause.  After some blood tests, he determined that my body wasn’t absorbing and processing protein.  As soon as I began a regimen of protein booster shots, my health began to improve.  I was still sickly as a child; I had immunity issues, and I was small for my age, but I was out of grave danger.  I had to relearn how to walk, and my return to solid foods (especially meat) was a gradual one.  I have no actual memory of these events, but I learned a valuable lesson about prayer.

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When we pray “Thy will be done,” we sometimes think it is “our” will vs. “God’s” will… that God’s will is always opposed to ours; that it will lead to us losing whatever it is we are holding on to.  That may be the case, sometimes.  We grapple with God’s will, struggling and wrestling, like Jacob, until we are forced to give in.  Some of us limp our way to the altar of prayer.  But God’s will is not set in relation to ours– His will is His own.  It is higher than ours.  It is perfect and complete.  That doesn’t always make it pleasant, comfortable, or easy.  In my family’s case, it meant months of trips to get shots– every day for the first few weeks; every week for months afterwards, and every month after that until the time I started Kindergarten (a year later than I might have if I had been healthier).  For many, “Thy will be done,” means saying goodbye to a loved one.  Sometimes it means losing a limb, or letting go of a cherished dream.  But what we see; what we experience; these are mere moments in God’s plan for our eternity.  Like the booster shots I had to have as a child, they bring a momentary sting, and the fear of them may loom large, but in God’s plan, they bring us the opportunity for life and health and ultimately, triumph.

Sometimes God’s will means walking through the fire, or walking through the valley of the shadow of death.  Long before my birth and health scare, my mother had lost twins, and been a divorced mother of a young son.  She had already faced death and heartbreak and hardship.  After this incident, she would be hurt by my brother’s teenage rebellion, face depression, and go through health issues with my father before his death; but she would also gain another daughter and live to see grandchildren and great-grandchildren who brought her joy.  In my own life, I have faced the shattered dream of wanting children of my own. I struggled for years with singleness, when I wanted to be married and have a family.  But God’s will was for me to learn patience, compassion, and empathy for others who hurt in these areas.  And he has blessed me with a family I would never have imagined–not only the husband, step-children, and grandkids, but all the students and children I met through my careers in education and public libraries.

It is natural and easy to pray for what our will, our feelings, or our intuition tells us is best– healing for the sick (immediate healing is even better), success for our ventures and those of our families and friends, safety in travels and daily routines, prosperity, and happiness.  It is not wrong to want these things.  But it is better by far to remember that God is sovereign and good.  Giving him complete control over our situations is not weakness; it is not “giving up”.  Instead, it is investing our future– putting it in the hands of the one who holds tomorrow, and all of eternity!  It is trusting the one who is most trustworthy to make the most of our hours and days, our treasures and our dreams.

Even Jesus taught His disciples to pray “thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven” (Matthew 6:10b). But He didn’t just teach that phrase to His disciples– He prayed it Himself in the Garden of Gethsemane. “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:42). Jesus knew he would face humiliation, torture, and death. He knew that He would take on the punishment for all the sins of the world– punishment He did not deserve– and that He would be subject to the full wrath of God. In His humanness, He was anguished to the point of sweating drops of blood. Yet He chose to pray, “Thy will be done.”

I have never been in that kind of anguish– even when I was so very sick or depressed about seemingly broken dreams. But I still find it difficult to fully surrender to God’s sovereign will when the future is in doubt, and when the present looks overwhelming. But growth and victory come when I let God take the reins and guide me through the valleys and wilderness walkways of life. His will is mysterious and sometimes scary, but He is always faithful. And I know that from experience.

Jephthah or Jabez?

There are many great examples of prayer throughout the Bible, but there are two that are often used out of context and applied wrongly.  One is found in the book of the Judges; the other in the Chronicles.

Jephthah was a mighty warrior– the son of a mighty warrior and a prostitute.  He had several half-brothers, but they wanted nothing to do with him.  He was an outcast for much of his life, but when things got tough, the people of the region changed their tune and begged him to be their leader and help deliver them from the oppressive Ammonites.   Before going into battle, Jephthah prayed, and made a tragic vow.  In fact, his vow has become a model of what NOT to do in approaching God.

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Judges 11:30-31 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
30 Jephthah made a vow to the Lord and said, “If You will indeed give the sons of Ammon into my hand, 31 then it shall be that whatever comes out of the doors of my house to meet me when I return in peace from the sons of Ammon, it shall be the Lord’s, and I will offer it up as a burnt offering.”

Upon returning from his success in battle, who should come out of the door of his house, but his only daughter, singing and dancing in celebration of her father’s victory!  Having made such a rash vow, Jephthah now has to fulfill it, and sacrifices his only child on the altar.

Many people read this passage of scripture and are shocked– how could God be so cruel?  Why didn’t he stop Jephthah from making such a rash vow?  How could he hold Jephthah to such a vow?  Doesn’t this prove that God is either clueless or deliberately cruel?  Either God knew that the tragedy would happen, and failed to prevent it, or he had no idea  of the outcome.

But I think this is a misreading of events and a misrepresentation of God.  Just before Jephthah makes his vow, the text states that “the Spirit of the Lord came upon Jephthah.  He crossed Gilead and Manasseh, passed through Mizpah of Gilead, and from there he advanced upon the Ammonites.”  People make note of the first part of verse 29, that the Spirit of the Lord came upon Jephthah prior to his making the rash vow.  But we should note that God’s Spirit did not require Jephthah to make ANY vow.   Jephthah’s vow was rash and ill-considered– these are not attributes of God or of His Spirit.  And God’s Spirit came upon Jephthah before he crossed his own native territory– territory he had fled early in life.  In crossing back through lands that now welcomed him after making him feel unwanted and ashamed, Jephthah gets cocky.  His vow is not about saving his nation from harm and oppression, or about bringing God glory.  It is about himself.  He mentions himself five times; his enemies, God, and his sacrifice, each twice; Israel never. 

Jephthah had an incredible opportunity, not only to save his nation, but to redeem his reputation and become a leader of might and integrity.  Instead, he is remembered for his rash vow.  I believe that God could have stopped Jephthah from making such a vow; and God could have kept his daughter from coming out of the house that day of her father’s return.  But I don’t believe it was cruelty that prevented him from acting.  I believe God is both omnipotent and good.  Jephthah learned the hard way that his rash self-promotion had disastrous consequences.  His daughter, who was innocent, could have berated her father, or cursed God– instead, she honored them both in a way that reflected her culture and teaching.  We are given a shocking reminder not to play games with our unknown future.  God does not keep us from our own folly, nor from its consequences, when we fail to seek His wisdom above our own pride.

In contrast, we see another prayer in 1 Chronicles:

1 Chronicles 4:9-10 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
Jabez was more honorable than his brothers, and his mother named him Jabez saying, “Because I bore him with pain.” 10 Now Jabez called on the God of Israel, saying, “Oh that You would bless me indeed and enlarge my border, and that Your hand might be with me, and that You would keep me from harm that it may not pain me!” And God granted him what he requested.

Once again, this prayer is sometimes taken out of context and misused to suggest that God is like a genie in a bottle, and that a pain-free life and expanded riches are ours just for the asking.  If we pray the prayer of Jabez, and we don’t see an immediate change in our circumstances, we sometimes question God’s goodness and His provision– doesn’t He care about our needs?  Doesn’t he hear our prayer?

Jabez, unlike Jephthah above, is described as honorable.  His prayer is more balanced and conscious of God’s sovereignty.  Jabez mentions himself five times, just like Jephthah; but he mentions God three times in supplication– asking God to be with him, help him, and bless him, rather than vowing what he can do for God if God grants him victory.    Notice also the context of the preceding verse.  His prayer is partly asking God to remove the sting and curse of his name, which meant “pain.”  He is not asking for enormous wealth or power, so much as asking for God’s presence and blessing.  There is a subtle, but important difference here.  Jephthah is playing at making a deal with God– If you grant me a victory, I will make it up to you by offering whatever comes out of my house.  Jephthah is asking for God’s help, but he is also vowing to give God “whatever comes out of the doors of MY house” (emphasis added). If a rat had come scurrying out, would Jabez have offered that? If it was a chicken or a lizard, or a lame sheep? And “whatever” came out of Jephthah’s house already belonged to God, and came from the hand of God, didn’t it?

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Jabez comes with nothing and asks God to be his portion and protection.  He makes no bargain with God contingent on God’s answer.  There is nothing in this prayer that assumes God’s riches will be his or that God owes him anything; only the faith that God is able to bless him, and that God, in his goodness can keep him from harm.

Jephthah, or Jabez?  Two examples…two very different outcomes.  May we have the wisdom not to confuse the two, or lose the lessons they teach.

Sowing the Wind

“They sow the wind, and reap the whirlwind…”  Hosea 8:7

Hosea was a prophet who foretold the destruction (and eventual restoration) of his people.  God was pouring out his judgment against an unfaithful nation, and he used the tragic family life of Hosea as a living example of his dealings with Israel.  Hosea married a prostitute; an unfaithful and unloving spouse who chased after men with ready money and cheap gifts.  But when her activities resulted in slavery, shame, and despair, Hosea redeemed her and restored her as his wife.  In the same way, God had made a promise to the people of Israel, but they had broken their covenant and followed their own rules, chasing after the surrounding cultures, with their foreign gods and their hedonistic rituals, including human sacrifice, temple prostitutes, and divination.  There are many metaphors used throughout this book, but one that often stands out is the short phrase found in chapter eight.  In it, God is talking about the unfaithful priests and leaders of Israel, who have not only betrayed God in their rebellion and idolatry, but have led others astray.  God says of them that they have sown the wind, and are reaping/will reap the whirlwind.

How does this relate to us today in our pursuit of prayer?

I believe that many of us are sowing the wind– we do it in our careless words, gossip, rumor-mongering, complaining, babbling, prattling, and yes, in our half-hearted obedience, and our tepid prayers.  We often come to God, not eager to commune with him, or to hear his voice, not in humble adoration and open confession, but to complain, wheedle, and boast.  We pay lip service to his Holiness, while refusing to give up that bad habit that “isn’t really all that bad.”  We thank him for his Grace, but harbor resentment against a neighbor or family member who slighted us.  We ask for him to bring us success in our plans and ventures without really making sure if they line up with his will.  We excuse our lack of attendance at church, and our failure to spend time in God’s word.  We make rash promises to do “better” if God just gets us through this week.  We ask for his blessing, and thank him for the riches he has bestowed on us, but we turn our noses at those in our backyard who are in need.  We are bold about posting “Christian” sayings on Facebook, X, Pinterest, and Instagram–almost as bold as posting about our favorite new Brew Pub or Spa trip or “almost inappropriate” joke, or latest political rant.  Except that our “Christian” posts are less entertaining and more critical of others.  (They’re usually really pretty, though– pictures of flowers or mountain streams or desert sunsets–it’s really easy to “like” and “share” a sunset!.)  We cheapen the Gospel, we cheapen the Christian walk, we cheapen prayer, when we pursue it as a hobby or a social habit. Bur prayer is not something we do only because (or only when)  it makes us feel “good” or “better”– it is something we pursue because it brings us life and peace for eternity, and it brings glory and joy to the King of Kings.

“They sow the wind, and reap the whirlwind…”  There is a price for this shallow, careless pursuit of something that looks and feels vaguely like Godliness.  It is the whirlwind…being tossed about by “every wind of doctrine” as Paul warns against in Ephesians 4.  It is being caught up in doubts and half-truths, compromises, hypocrisy, division, scandal, and shame.  It is having to face the onslaught of detractors and persecution that come as a result of so many of us abusing and misrepresenting the very Gospel of the one whose name we carry.   “Oh, what peace we often forfeit; Oh, what needless pain we bear; All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.”  The words of that old hymn are no less true today– when we trifle with prayer, carrying only our selfish needs, our petty complaints, and our flimsy agendas to God in prayer, we pay a huge price.

There is another metaphor, this one in the Gospel of John, that I think helps us combat this tendency to “sow the wind”–  Jesus says of himself in John 15 that he is the vine, and we are the branches.  If we are faithful, we remain in him– we draw our life and strength from him– and we are fruitful.  Remaining in him, we are grounded– he provides the roots that keep us from blowing every which way.  And he provides the nourishment, and strength to grow and produce more fruit.

I say “we” because I too am guilty of having sown the wind.  The great news, in Hosea and in the Gospel of John, is that God is eager to restore us– to graft us in–to welcome us home after our storm-tossed wanderings.  Let’s get serious about abiding in God, instead of scattering the latest “feel-good” religious spam.  God, forgive me for the times I have cheapened your precious gift of prayer.  Help me to abide in you, and refrain from careless words to you, about you, and about others.

Transformative Prayer

This cute meme has been making the rounds on Facebook and Pinterest a couple of years ago.  It suggests that prayer turns meek kittens into mighty lions.  And it can.  Most times it should.  But how often do we experience this level of transformation when we pray?

I write this blog, partly in response to comments I’ve heard or read that belittle the effectiveness and the power of prayer.  I talk a good game when it comes to prayer–I pray daily, I keep a prayer journal, I consider myself a prayer veteran, even a prayer warrior.  I believe in the transformative power of prayer.  So why do I often feel like a kitten both before and after prayer?

I’m afraid that, too often, I really don’t want to be transformed when I pray.  I want to be heard; I want to be comforted; I want to be refreshed.  But I don’t really want transformation.  Transformation is not cute or comfortable–it hurts, it stretches.  Transformation requires risk and commitment in the face of uncertainty.  I want to be a kitten who thinks of herself as a lioness, but I want a cozy lap to rest on, and a bowl of gourmet cat food laid out for me.  Kittens may wrestle with yarn or mice; lionesses wrestle with crocodiles and wildebeests.  I want to lift up those in pain, those who struggle, those in need– but I want to do it from the comfort of my own quiet corner.

If my prayer life isn’t causing changes in every other aspect of my life, I need to be concerned.  Prayer that never calls me into battle; prayer that leaves me feeling comfortable while others suffer..that isn’t really prayer.  That is giving lip service without heart-service.

But I also need to be careful to be transformed by the renewing of my mind (See Romans 12: 1-3).  Prayer should be transforming my heart and mind, but in Christ’s likeness.  Christ, who is not only the Lion of Judah, but the Lamb of God.  There are times when I should charge out of the prayer room, energized and ready for battle.  But it must come from God’s spirit, and not my own pride or in conformity to the world’s pattern of fighting.  Transformation doesn’t come about just because I say any prayer– it comes about as I walk and talk with the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  I don’t have the power to transform myself, nor do I have the power to decide the nature and speed of my journey.

I think sometimes, I see it as all or nothing– either I am running full speed ahead and making great conquests (Lioness), or I am mewling  and helpless (Kitten).  But God sees the bigger picture.  Sometimes,  we should enter the prayer room as kittens and leave like lions; other times we should enter as lions and leave as lambs– recognizing that our own roaring will never win the battle, and also recognizing that sometimes, in quiet obedience and sacrifice, we are doing what is necessary in the larger plan.  What should never happen is that we go running into the prayer room eager and ready to serve, and come sauntering or swaggering out, puffed up with our own importance, but unmoved toward others.

So the challenge is to go into the prayer room, expecting to be transformed– by God, for God’s glory, into the people God wants us to be– expecting to be changed, stretched and challenged.

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In Everything Give Thanks

So many times my prayers do not reflect a grateful heart, but a needy one.  Giving thanks is easy in those miraculous moments, and those special times of reflection and rejoicing.  It is not so easy during times of stress, suffering, and waiting.

God blesses those who are “poor in spirit”; he is close to the broken-hearted, the weary, and the afflicted.  Yet he asks us to give thanks always and in all circumstances.  Many people see this as unreasonable, egotistical, and tyrannical on the part of God– that somehow, he needs our constant and abject praise.  But what if this command is for OUR benefit? Let’s break this down:

IN everything– Not for everything.  We don’t thank God FOR the death of a loved one, or the loss of a home, or an injustice done to us.  But we can and should thank God for being sovereign throughout all the circumstances of life; for conquering death, for providing help and hope in our times of need; for promising both justice when we have been wronged, and grace when we have been unjust in our turn. There is never a time when we CANNOT be thankful–though there are many times when it is difficult, or when we choose not look beyond our pain.


EVERYTHING–Not just the “big” things– everything.  We can be thankful for teeth, for dishes to wash, for traffic, for the way the moon hangs in the misty darkness, for a puppy’s eager greeting, for finally understanding our math homework, for the memory of a loved one, for the song that keeps playing in our head.  Sometimes it’s not the actual thing, but what it represents that causes gratitude to well up and turn our hearts back to God.  If we wait for “something to be thankful for”, we’ll often miss those things right in front of us.
GIVE– Giving thanks is an action, not just a reaction.  It is a choice; a mindset.  We learn to say “Thank you” as children.  Our parents pound it into our training as “etiquette” or “manners”, but everyone can tell when a thank you is genuine.  Saying “Thanks” is not  the same as giving Thanks.  Actions speak much louder than mere words, and our choices in the moment are a reflection of our true character and not just “good training.”

THANKS– not just the word, but the concept.  Even in my neediest moments, as I pour out a suffering, exhausted, wounded, and broken heart, I do so because I have a God who is THERE– a God who listens, who cares, who never leaves me alone and hopeless.  I may feel overwhelmed, abandoned, even battered in those moments.  But those awful moments do not define my life, nor do they characterize my walk with God.

This morning, I woke up–a small and underappreciated miracle– I am alive!  I opened my eyes– I can see!  I looked up and saw a roof over my head–I have shelter!  I turned over and got out of bed– I can move!  I have a bed, mattress, pillows, sheets…a bedroom!  I brushed my teeth and washed my face– running water!  Teeth!  A toothbrush!  A  wash cloth! Skin!  A bathroom–indoor plumbing!   I saw a stack of bills on the table– I have electricity! Heat and air conditioning!  A table!  Money to pay bills!…I’m writing this on a computer with wireless internet in my apartment!  All these things are precious gifts from God.  I can be grateful, and give Him the thanks He deserves, or I can choose to ignore the blessings, or take the credit myself.

And what if I wake up tomorrow and I can’t see?  What if my blessings all disappear– no house, no running water, no food or internet; no money, no family?  Giving thanks is still a choice.  I can choose to be thankful for who God is, and for what he has chosen to give me– or I can choose to be angry and envious and bitter.  Some of the most grateful people I have ever met are those who have struggled with difficult circumstances– poverty, pain, loss, injustice–and yet they have chosen to look beyond those circumstances to give praise to God.  Some of the most miserable people I’ve met are those who choose to look at their blessings with contempt; those who deny God’s goodness and choose to see only what they want but don’t have.

David and I recently closed our store.  We had been open for 12 years, and we enjoyed having a business.  But times change; our circumstances have changed; the economy has changed, including shopping patterns.  After 12 years, this feels like a great loss.  Yet, God is faithful.  We met a lot of wonderful people, and we were able to provide goods and services to many within our community.  

What happens next is uncertain– to us.  But God knows exactly what options we have, and we trust that He will give us wisdom as we move forward.

And in everything, we will give thanks.  And I’m so grateful that we can offer prayers of praise, of petition, of pain; prayers for people and places and priorities; prayers in the uncertainty, and in the unfolding of what is to come.

 

 

“Your Mission, Should You Choose to Accept It…”

Anyone old enough to remember the old TV show, or anyone who has seen the movies with Tom Cruise, will recognize the title quote from Mission Impossible.  A message, containing details of a top secret mission, would be sent to an agent of the CIA.  After the message had been delivered, it would self-destruct, and the agent would set out to save the world from terrorists or other worldwide threats.  It made for exciting entertainment– speeding trains, double agents, close calls with assassins, death-defying stunts, and lots of explosions– all happening in exotic locations around the world.

Prayer doesn’t usually involve death-defying stunts or explosions, but in can involve a mission, and exotic locations.  As I started keeping a prayer journal, I wanted to pray for people around the world– except I’m not a world traveler.  I’ve never been to Fiji or Burundi, Greenland or the Gobi Desert.  I know some missionaries who have lived or are living overseas, and their newsletters are helpful and personal– I can pray for them, for their fellow workers, and for their neighbors and friends and circumstances across the globe.  But I wondered, couldn’t I do more?  What if I set aside one day for every country on earth– to pray for that country and its people even once a year?  That might seem like an impossible mission.  How can I pray effectively for a country if I don’t even know where it is or how to pronounce its name?  Thankfully, I have a lot of help.  The internet is a great resource for finding out about countries, especially those in the news.  But one of my favorite resources is the CIA!pexels-photo-319968.jpeg

The Central Intelligence Agency of the United States of America is not just in the spy business.  They collect “intelligence”– facts about our world and every country in it–maps, statistics, flags, forms of government, populations, literacy and mortality rates, and so much more. https://www.cia.gov/the-world-factbook/
By visiting their site, you can find out more about any country in the world, and use that information to pray for very specific needs–countries that have been ravaged by war, disease, faltering economies; those countries facing turmoil from burgeoning immigration or sectarian violence.  You can find out the official language(s) of any country, the approximate breakdown of religious affiliation, the percentage of the population that suffers from obesity, illiteracy, or poverty– even some of the history and social structure. Are there major rivers or mountain ranges in that country?  What natural resources do they have (or not have).

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As I put together a yearly prayer journal, I realized that there are actually more days than countries. But that’s ok. In a single year, I can pray for every nation, but I can also lift up each state in the U.S., every Canadian province, and several major world cities! I can even pray for continents and oceans and focue on one geographic area every day!

I don’t spend hours poring over each country, city, state or continent each day– sometimes, I just lift up that area by name, knowing that God already knows the needs and situations in each place better than I ever could (even with the help of drones and spies).  But when I have the time, I like to learn more about the amazing diversity of peoples, languages, cultures, and circumstances around the world.  It reminds me that God has all of them in his hand, on his mind, and in his heart at all times.  It’s a big world out there, though it often seems to be shrinking.   God is Bigger!  There are a lot of tragic circumstances and heartbreaking issues around the world.  God is still Sovereign!  There are millions of people in remote and forgotten corners of the world– God sees and cherishes all of them!

I still have my “first world” problems, and personal issues to bring to the throne of Grace, but what a privilege to be able to lift up others– people I have never met in places I will never be able to visit–knowing that I can have a tiny part in the work God wants to do in their lives, as well as in mine.

What Did Mary Know?

The song above asks, “Mary, did you know?” as it lists many things that Jesus did during his ministry on Earth. But just how much DID Mary know on that night in Bethlehem? From what we read in Luke 1, Mary knew only that this coming Child was sent by God to be the Messiah. But the angel didn’t spell out how that Messiah would be born or how Mary should be a mother to the King of Kings. The angel never promised Mary that Joseph would agree to marry her, or that her family would not disown her. The angel said nothing about a census; no warning that Mary would have to travel to Bethlehem, where there would be no room in any inn, and no safe, clean place to deliver God’s chosen one. Mary had no knowledge of the shepherds who would come from the cold and dirty fields to get a glimpse of her shivering infant. She had no idea that wise men from distant lands would present her with such impractical gifts as frankincense and myrrh, or that she would be forced to take her small son into Egyptian exile.

In fact, while the shepherds were visited by a heavenly host, glorifying and praising God; while the wise men were following an amazing star in the heavens, Mary was seemingly forgotten– giving birth in a cattle shed, tucked away in an unfamiliar, backwater town, without the comforts of her home and family (save Joseph, who was a first-time father himself!), without clean water or extra blankets, without the comforting voice of an angel reminding her that it would all turn out in the end.

I can only imagine how she might have felt. Was she frightened? Confused? She could have been angry or bitter, panicked or forlorn. She was not privy to the wonder of the angels or the star. She could have no idea of the miracles that her Son would do. And, while Simeon hinted at the piercing grief she would know at the crucifixion (see Luke 2:33-34), Mary could have no idea of the grueling death her Son would suffer.

Mary was so young. She knew so little. And yet, Luke tells us that she ” treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” (Luke 2:19 NIV).

This Advent season, I want to take time to ponder; to meditate on the promises of God, on His timing, and His provision. Mary’s journey to Bethlehem was unplanned– by her. But God had planned it from the very beginning. He KNEW there would be no room in the inn. God KNEW all that would happen– the flight to Egypt, the years of Jesus’ ministry, the betrayal and suffering to come. And God KNEW Mary! He knew her questions, He knew her heart, He knew her fears, and her limitations.

It is comforting to know that God KNEW, and that He KNOWS all that is to come in my life. When it feels like I have been forgotten or relegated to a place where there is no room, no resources, no welcome– I can remember that God is there exactly as He was for Mary and Joseph on that night long ago. Just like Mary, I can treasure those incomprehensible moments when God sends a shepherd or a wise man into my path; someone whose presence, though unexpected or even inconvenient, reminds me that God’s plans are far bigger than what I can know or imagine.

One thing Mary DID know was that she could trust God absolutely. May we ponder this truth throughout the season and treasure His promises today.

All I Want for Christmas…

Children are busily writing letters to Santa and making lists for their parents– “I want…” We’re listening to “Christmas Classics” on the radio– “All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth.” “All I Want for Christmas is You,” “I’ll be home for Christmas…Please have snow and mistletoe and presents on the tree…” “Christmas, Christmas time is here; time for toys and time for cheer. We’ve been good but we can’t last– Hurry, Christmas. Hurry fast!”

Advent is a time of expectation and hope. But it can also be a time of selfishness and greed. “I want…” “I’m dreaming…” Even if the things we want and wish for are not ‘bad’ things, we can get so caught up in the wanting and wishing, that we forget the deeper meaning and purpose– not just of Christmas, but of life! Life isn’t about getting things– even good or nice things. And Christmas, while it is a season of gifts, is primarily a season of giving.

Turning the radio to a Christian station, I can hear old familiar carols reminding me of the real reason for this season. “O Come, O Come, Emanuel!” “Joy to the World!” “Hark, the Herald Angels Sing–Glory to the Newborn King!” “What Can I Give Him, Poor As I Am?” “Yet In Thy Dark Streets Shineth the Everlasting Light…” “This, this is Christ the King; whom shepherds guard and angels sing.”

Even so, it is tempting to spend time this Advent season thinking and praying about all the things we want– noble things like Peace on Earth, Good Will to Men, and good things like health and happiness for our loved ones, and even selfish things, like a new toaster or a new pair of gloves. But what about what GOD wants this Christmas?

Photo by Wolf Art on Pexels.com

God wants us to enjoy the blessings He sends our way. But He also wants us to be grateful for the blessings we already have; the ones we have enjoyed (and even taken for granted) all year long. He wants us to take time in this busy season to reach out, not just with gifts and cookies and lights and greeting cards, but with compassion, warmth of heart, a willingness to listen, an invitation to share tears as well as joys, and efforts to heal old wounds and make peace right in our own families and neighborhoods. Christmas isn’t just about the baby in the manger– it’s about the Christ of the Cross, and the Return of Christ the Triumphant. And this is Our Advent season– awaiting and preparing for His Return!

There are many good things to “want” this Christmas. But all I really want is to be ready for His Coming– ready to receive His Grace, His Hope, His Joy, and to point others to “Thy Glorious Light!”

Listen and Learn

I spend a lot of time on this blog “talking”– writing about how to talk to God, why I talk to God, when or where to talk to God, etc.. But today, I want to focus on listening.

Prayer shouldn’t just be about talking. After all, prayer is a conversation. It just makes sense that we need to practice both the speaking and listening elements of communication. And yet, we rarely get a direct spoken “answer” to any of our prayers. So how do we listen for God’s response? How do we know when God is “speaking” to us? Or are we merely fooling ourselves with wishful thinking?

I think there are several key ways that we can listen for God’s response, and several ways that we can learn to recognize God’s “voice.”

  • First, we should spend some time actually being quiet! Find some time each day or several times a week to meditate. It doesn’t have to be a long time, and it doesn’t have to be formalized or systematic. But make time for quiet reflection. It is in moments like this that God often grabs our attention– away from the competing noise of our surroundings, distractions, other voices, and even our own racing thoughts.
  • Spend time in God’s Word! God has already spoken wisdom, warning, encouragement, and hope in the Scriptures. God’s Word is active and relevant–if we are open to reading, understanding, and absorbing it. I can’t count the number of times I’ve read a familiar passage of scripture and suddenly realized its connection to my current circumstances or gained new wisdom from it.
  • Another way is to listen to solid and trustworthy advice. God often chooses to speak through others– others who have shared life experiences, or wisdom gained from many years of living. Listen without interrupting or pre-judging. Listen to those whose lives reflect the peace and joy of life with Christ.
  • Seek truth! Seek it in God’s word, seek it from your critics and detractors as well as your friends and encouragers. You may realize that you have been listening to lies– either convenient half-truths that lull you into complacency, or negative lies that have bound you in fear and inactivity. God’s voice will convict, reassure, and confirm, but it will always be TRUE. God will never contradict what is in His Word, and He will not flatter you or “flatten” you when He speaks.
  • Listen for confirmation. Just because you hear what sounds “good” doesn’t mean it is from God. Just because you hear what sounds difficult, doesn’t mean that God won’t be with you. But if we only listen for what we want to hear, or if we stop listening to what seems difficult, we may miss out or even drown out what God is really saying.
  • Be consistent in obedience. Often, we are listening for wisdom when we face large decisions or unexpected circumstances. But wisdom comes easier when we not only listen for it but follow it in our habits, routines, and everyday practices. I may not know what God is “saying” about taking a new job, moving to a new area, or facing a major life change. But I DO know what God says about integrity, worship, loving my neighbor, etc.. Jesus taught His disciples to FOLLOW Him. We can learn a lot, and even hear the voice of God, and still miss the point!

Don’t give up praying. Don’t stop speaking to God. Pour out your heart and soul to Him. But don’t stop listening for His still, small voice! Let’s listen, learn, and live out our Faith today!

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