More Jesus, Less Me?

Last week, I saw numerous posts with New Year’s resolutions, promises, and goals. One that I saw repeated often was the phrase, “This year, I need more of Jesus and Less of Me.” And, while I can see the appeal of such a phrase, I’d like to take a closer look at what that really means in a practical sense.

It’s easy enough to say a phrase like this and then proceed to live exactly the same as last year– struggling to be a “better” person, a more Christ-like person–and wondering why it isn’t working. But what if we’re missing the real transformation we need this year by misunderstanding what this phrase really means?

“More Jesus.” Actually, there is no “more” Jesus to be had than there already is. We can’t “get” more Jesus. We already have access to all the Grace, Power, and Peace that Jesus can offer. We have His Spirit to guide us, His example to follow, His indescribable sacrifice to motivate us, His promises to sustain us…what “more” are we looking for?

What we really mean by this phrase isn’t more of Jesus, but more TO Jesus and more FOR Jesus– more of our devotion, more of our obedience, more of our submission, more of our learning to lean on Him. We need to make more room for Him, more time for Him, more energy.

“Less Me.” In today’s world that revolves around identity and self-expression, this is where we lose non-believers, and many Christians, as well. The language of the New Testament– Jesus’ own words in fact! — call for us to die to ourselves and be raised to new life in Him. To many people, this seems like a very bad bargain. Matthew 16:25 puts it this way: “ For anyone who keeps his life for himself shall lose it; and anyone who loses his life for me shall find it again.” (The Living Bible) But look closely at this statement. Jesus is not promising death, but LIFE. (See also John 10:10) Jesus isn’t proposing to take away our life, but to help us find our best life. The word “life” in this passage can be translated as “life” or “soul.” When we think of “dying” to ourselves, or “losing” our life, we see only the negative. And death IS the ultimate negative. We don’t want to “die.” We don’t want to let go of this precious gift of life that we have been given. And it seems as though Jesus asks us to make a ridiculous trade– our life for His; our will for His; our self-control and determination for His mastery and domination.

Except that is Satan’s oldest and greatest lie! When Jesus says, “anyone who loses his life for me shall find it again,” He’s not promising a shadow life of slavery or degradation. God doesn’t want Holy zombies or robots, mindlessly and grudgingly following orders. He wants to bring us into the BEST and most abundant LIFE we can experience! But in order to experience any of it, we have to “get out of the way!” We have been given the ability to choose between right and wrong, between following God’s way or rebelling against it. It is when we believe the lie that God doesn’t love us, that He doesn’t have our best interests at heart, that He is withholding “something” from us– power, “fun,” happiness, achievement, etc.–that we lose our true life. We lose perspective, we lose joy, we lose peace, we lose our true purpose, we lost trust, and we lose hope. We get so worried that God will “cheat” us out of what we want in life, that we become enslaved to our own limitations and fears. I have hopes and dreams, but on my own, I will scheme, connive, compromise, and fall short of what I could become. I will let circumstances and bitterness determine my limits. I will betray all the promises of God for all the lies of the world. i may “win” the game of life, but in the end, I will still die. And I will die never knowing what I might have achieved WITH God, instead of in my own strength and wisdom.

So when we say, “Less Me,” what we really mean is less of my grasping, less of my whining, less of my demanding my own way, less of me shutting out others, less of me standing in opposition to God’s best for my life. ”More Jesus”– more trust in Him, more humbly walking WITH Him, instead of shaking my fists AT Him, actually results in “More Me”– not the ME that wants the world to revolve around only myself, but the Me that God created me to be! The Me that can only be shaped by a Master’s Hand. The created me bringing glory to and through the Creator!

So this year, instead of saying “More Jesus, Less Me,” maybe we should say, “Me Less, Jesus More!” Me less and less in the driver’s seat. Me less prideful and isolated. Me less prone to anger and bitterness. Me less in the center of my thoughts and plans for today. Jesus more in my daily talk. Jesus more in control of my emotions and reactions. Jesus more of my focus. Jesus more of my best and most trusted friend! And in the end, Me, More like Jesus made me!

Praying for Time

When I was a late teen, and into my early twenties, I loved English pop music, including the duo, Wham! Their music was bubbly, upbeat (mostly), and easy to sing along to. I listened along, sang along, watched their videos, and danced along. When the duo broke up, I was eager to follow the rise of singer/songwriter George Michael, whose first two solo albums I bought and listened to, as well. But the tone of his solo music was different. There were danceable, singable tunes, but they were darker and more cynical. And many of the songs were less about enjoying life and more about social commentary, confusion, and even despair. The songs were well-crafted, but they were haunting, rather than enjoyable or uplifting. They spoke of sadness, depression, and world-weariness.

One of the songs that has haunted me for years was from his second album, “Listen Without Prejudice.” In it, he talks about greed, poverty, apathy, and a loss of innocence. It’s called “Praying for Time,” but the tone of the song suggests that time has all but run out.

And yet…

One of the ideas that still shines through the words of the song is that prayer–specifically praying for time–may be the only hope that we can still cling to. And in a time of darkness and hopelessness, prayer can reach beyond “wounded skies” to a God whose Grace extends even to His children who have “slipped out the back door.”

There is something about the idea of time as a gift from God that stays in the soul, long after most hope is gone. I think it is why we are so driven by the concept of time and time “running out” as we hustle through our busy lives. I think it is why we spend time avoiding “down time” and “alone time” and the quiet time we should take to reflect, meditate, and yes, even time to pray. And I think, too, that it is why we recognize that wasted time is a sin– that there is a purpose in our time on Earth that transcends having “fun” or living for our own selfish aims. George Michael often used “spiritual” words and phrases for his songs– often with a cynical twist, pointing out some of the hypocrisy he saw around him (and occasionally, within himself).

These are the days of the open hand
They will not be the last
Look around now
These are the days of the beggars and the choosers

This is the year of the hungry man
Whose place is in the past
Hand in hand with ignorance
And legitimate excuses

The rich declare themselves poor
And most of us are not sure
If we have too much
But we’ll take our chances
‘Cause God’s stopped keeping score

I guess somewhere along the way
He must have let us all out to play
Turned his back and all God’s children
Crept out the back door

And it’s hard to love, there’s so much to hate
Hanging on to hope
When there is no hope to speak of
And the wounded skies above say it’s much, much too late
Well, maybe we should all be praying for time

These are the days of the empty hand
Oh, you hold on to what you can
And charity is a coat you wear twice a year

This is the year of the guilty man
Your television takes a stand
And you find that what was over there is over here

So you scream from behind your door
Say, “What’s mine is mine and not yours”
I may have too much but I’ll take my chances
‘Cause God’s stopped keeping score

And you cling to the things they sold you
Did you cover your eyes when they told you
That he can’t come back
‘Cause he has no children to come back for

It’s hard to love, there’s so much to hate
Hanging on to hope when there is no hope to speak of
And the wounded skies above say it’s much too late
So maybe we should all be praying for time

“Praying for Time” George Michael, Listen Without Prejudice, 1990 (lyrics taken from Lyrics.com)

In an interview, George Michael analyzes his own lyrics:

While he mentions “He” and “God,” it is clearly humanity he blames for the apathy and selfishness, greed and scandal, the “empty hand” and “wounded skies” mentioned in the song. And his repetition of “all God’s Children” and its counterpart, “no children to come back for,” is aimed at US– people who “slipped out the back door,” moving away from God and embracing our own wickedness. WE have entered this time of hopelessness and despair. WE have crafted it in our own ignorance, and then in our own pride and stubbornness. But we can still pray for time– time to repent, time to return, time to reach out to others with compassion and hope. What the song just barely misses is that prayer can open so much more than just time. Prayer can bring renewal, justice, redemption, and eternal hope! God hasn’t stopped “keeping score,” by any means. But He is holding back the wrath and judgment we all deserve, giving us time to seek Him! Most of all, we can pray, not with desperation, but with confidence– even in times of confusion and distress, because we have an Advocate, Jesus Christ, who hears all our prayers– desperate, confused, ashamed, angry, hopeful, offered with no more than a mustard seed’s faith.

George Michael, like all of us, lived in a fallen world. He was looking at the world, and seeing injustice, greed, apathy, corruption, violence, and the ravages of Sin. His own life was plagued with sorrow, tragedy, pain, injustice, drug addiction, betrayal, and the effects of Sin– both his own and others’. I don’t know if he ever found peace and hope in this life. I hope so. His gifted life ended early and tragically. But his song lives on with a warning, and a hint of promise, too.

We SHOULD all be praying for time– time to change. Time to repent, and seek God’s wisdom. Time to reach out to a darkened world with more than despair and dark analysis. To reach out with the Hope of Christ, who brings Redemption, Justice, and MERCY! We should be praying for time to meditate on the Goodness of God, as well as time to see the needs of others. We should be praying for wisdom to share our resources, and to multiply the good we can do– things that only God’s power can really accomplish. We should be praying for connection– restored relationships, and renewed fellowship with the Father. We should be praying for time to pray! Not just a desperate kind of prayer that this song suggests, but a lifelong pursuit of prayer that connects us to the Source of Hope, Joy, Peace, Power, and Love.

This year, while I don’t often listen to George Michael’s music anymore, I will be “praying for time.” And I will be investing more time in prayer! I hope you will join me in the time God has gifted us with this year!

For more analysis of the song and its relation to prayer see the following:

Come To Bethlehem

“O come, all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant,
O come ye, O come ye to Bethlehem!”

“Come to Bethlehem and see
Him whose birth the angels sing;
come, adore on bended knee
Christ the Lord, the new-born King.”

“O little town of Bethlehem,
how still we see thee lie!
Above thy deep and dreamless sleep
the silent stars go by.
Yet in thy dark streets shineth
the everlasting light;
the hopes and fears of all the years
are met in thee tonight.”

“Come!” It echoes in our Christmas Carols; it echoes throughout Jesus’ ministry. It thrums and courses through the prophets and into the Revelations, “Amen, Come Lord Jesus!”(Revelation 22:20)

Christmas is all about coming– the coming of the Christ Child; the coming of the angels to shepherds; the coming of the shepherds to see the newborn King; the coming of the Wise Men. And we are bidden to “come” to Bethlehem and share in the joy and wonder of God coming to be our Emmanuel– God With Us.

But the journey to Bethlehem is not as easy or a joyful as one might imagine. Bethlehem is crowded. It is dark and dreary. It is not “silent” as the hymns make out. It is noisy, dirty, and filled with people who “aren’t from around here.” There is no room here. There is no joyous welcome. There is not enough to eat, what with all the out-of-town travelers; shelves are bare, while garbage is piling up in the streets. Tempers are high, and patience is low.

“Come to Bethlehem.” At this moment, Bethlehem is caught in the chaos and struggle of war. Hospitals are in danger. People live in fear and violence. There is no peace and quiet– no silent streets or glorious angels in the sky– only the light and noise of rockets. We may not be able to physically travel to Bethlehem at the moment, but we can focus our prayers on the Middle East– to the hurting people in Israel and in Gaza– to earnestly pray for truth and peace there. We may not be able to travel back in time to Bethlehem, but we can travel across town to help our neighbors who need encouragement; we can step out of our safe and comfortable lives to share light in the dark regions of today’s world. And we can “Come” to prayer– to lift up those who are hurting, to ask for strength and courage to help, to own our own limitations and emptiness.

“Come to Bethlehem.” At this season, we are tempted to stay where it is cozy and familiar; or to travel somewhere warm and welcoming. We want the joy and peace of the Christmas Season to come to us! But we are bidden to come to Bethlehem, with its crowded streets and suspicious strangers; its unfamiliar alleys and rude Roman officials. We are bidden to come and share this message of peace where there IS no peace. We are asked to come where there is need and darkness and fear– to spread the Good News, not to sit on it.

“Come to Bethlehem.” Are we avoiding our own “Bethlehem?” Are there places we could visit to spread light; places we’re being called to, or places where we should go to “be counted,” but we refuse to come? Are there people we can encourage? Ways we can share hope and help– if we are willing to come away from our own comfort and (manufactured) joy?

Perhaps we long to hear the angels shouting “Glory to God in the Highest!” (Luke 2:14) But if we won’t “come” to Bethlehem, we may miss their song. We may miss seeing the message of Christmas if we insist that it comes to our pleasant palace, instead of seeking the Babe in the Manger of the Little Town of Bethlehem.

“Come to Bethlehem and See.” “Come, Let us Adore Him!” “Come!”

When Half-Spent Was the Night

‘Tis the season for Christmas Music– hymns and carols, ancient songs and modern tunes celebrating the Advent and Birth of the Lord Jesus. Joyful, passionate, somber, or even a bit silly, such music can lighten our spirits, and remind us of the incredible gift of God– Emmanuel–His very presence among mankind.

Christmas lyrics often use wonderful imagery to retell this amazing story. The Bible accounts tell of shepherds, angels, wise men, and stars– the songs give us the immediacy of a dark night– “silent”, “still”, “earth as hard as iron; water like a stone”, “a midnight clear”, “half-spent was the night”…

Most of us live in a world that rarely gets so dark. If we live in a town or city, we are surrounded by street lights, security lights, even night-lights in the hallway. Even so, we have a feeling for how the midnight and early morning hours seem darker, colder, quieter, and more dreary than any other time. And there is a significance in remembering that Jesus came to earth in the midst of literal and metaphorical darkness, “when half-spent was the night.”

Photo by Alex Fu on Pexels.com

God is Omnipresent– it is not as though God leaves us when all is merry and bright– but His presence is often most keenly sought, and unexpectedly found, in darkness and distress. When all seems bleak, cold, and hopeless, Jesus comes silently, small and fragile as a baby, bringing light, hope, joy, and peace. He comes when the night is “half-spent”– when the darkness is deepest, the silence weighs heaviest, and the cold is most bitter; when hope and light seem lost.

Jesus’ Advent came after four hundred hears of silence. Prophets, such as Isaiah, Zechariah, and Micah, had spoken of Messiah rescuing Israel from captivity. But the years had passed, and Rome ruled the Jewish people with an iron fist. God had stayed silent, and hope seemed remote. Rome would continue to rule the world for another four hundred years. But when Messiah arrived, He didn’t come to break the power of Rome. He didn’t come at the end of that particular “night”; rather, He came when the night was “half-spent.” He came gently, quietly, and humbly. He came to deliver Israel from something much darker, colder, and deadlier than a foreign occupation. Jesus, through His life and death and resurrection, came to deliver Israel, and the rest of the world, from the power of sin and death.

All the promise of deliverance and salvation that came in the middle of that bleak night so long ago, remains for us to celebrate– even in the middle of our “half-spent” nights.

We may not see the dawn in the middle of our struggles. We may not hear the angels singing or feel the warmth of the new day coming. But because of this “Rose e’er Blooming”, we can rejoice. We can find hope and peace in the present night, knowing that Emmanuel is with us! Like a lamp in the night, He will stay with us as we travel through the present darkness. After all, “Thy WORD is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.” (Psalm 119:105) Jesus is the Living Word of God, and thus, our living light!

“Losing” a Loved One

Our family had a funeral this week. One of my mom’s cousins passed away. We are a close family– distance-wise, as well as emotionally close. So the funeral was huge…hundreds of people coming to pay their last respects. And most of us spouting the same old phrases and platitudes: “So sorry for your loss.” “She will be greatly missed.” “At least she’s not in pain anymore.” “It’s so hard to lose a loved one.”

Except– she’s not lost! She hasn’t gone missing. She died. And, because she is a believer, she is HOME! Yes, WE experience a sense of loss. We grieve and mourn her absence from us. And the pain and grief is very real. I still find myself grieving the “loss” of my dad after 25 years, and the more recent death of my mom earlier this year. But sorrow and grieving for us as Christians is tempered with hope, comfort, peace, and even joy and amazement. Linda, Mom, Dad, Grandma and Grandpa, and so many other precious believers are not Lost. They are not the victims of Death. In fact, as part of the funeral service, we were reminded of the words of the Apostle Paul in 1 Corinthians:

54 When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.”
55 “Where, O death, is your victory?
    Where, O death, is your sting?”
56 The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57 But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 58 Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

1 Corinthians 15:54-58

Yet Death does claim victims, and there are people who are “Lost,” who will be “greatly missed.” They are the ones who have died without hope, without peace, and without eternal life. In fact, many of them are still walking around– the living dead– the unsaved. I shed far more tears over those who are forever lost– those who will not accept the free gift of eternal life– than I will for those loved ones who have died in Christ. God welcomes us to be “found” in Him. He went to great lengths to defeat the power of Death, to bring true justice, and to shower us with Grace beyond our wildest imaginings. It is His gift to anyone who will trust Him. Yes, we will still taste death– and suffer pain and injustice, heartbreak and grief in this life. But these are the shadows. What comes after is the Light!

We shed some tears at the funeral this week, but we also laughed, hugged, sang, and said, “AMEN!” Linda ran the race, and she did not die (or live) in vain. She left a legacy of love and kindness that was celebrated this week. Heaven “gained” a loved one. And, while it hurts us not to be able to see her or laugh or sing with her right now, we know we will be reunited. And she is reunited with loved ones who have passed on before. But most of all, she is united with her Creator, her Redeemer, the Lover of her Soul, and her Lord. And ten thousand years from now, Linda will still be singing His praises!

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep..

Now I lay me down to sleep;
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.

I learned this prayer as a child. It seemed very grim, and pessimistic. As a child, I spent very little time (as little as possible) thinking of my own mortality, or the state of my soul after a day of playing with dolls or running around outside. I was blessed with a safe and easy childhood. Of course, I had days of sickness, a bout of chicken pox, the loss of a pet, news of neighbors who had died in war, fallen to cancer, or been killed in accidents–moments that caused me to reflect a bit more. But I didn’t want to think about serious things. I wanted peace and happiness.

As a younger adult, I came to the conclusion that prayers like this were old-fashioned, and designed to scare vulnerable children into a false faith based on fear and gloom. Shouldn’t children learn about the Love of Jesus and the Mercy of the Father, instead of worrying about death and eternal doom of their soul? Prayers like this would be “bad” for young children; traumatic and disturbing. Better to teach them prayers that were sweet and light, and full of only the goodness of God.

Lately, however, I remember things a bit differently. Yes, there is gloom and doom in this old children’s prayer, but there is also comfort, Love, and Mercy. As a child, I could “lay me down” to sleep in peace, knowing that God would, indeed, keep my soul from harm. I didn’t expect to die, but when I woke up dreaming of monsters, or suddenly became aware of mortality, I didn’t have to stay fearful. God is bigger than any monster; bigger then Death. I could not trust anyone better, mightier, or more capable than the Lord to keep my soul, or to “take” it safely to its final destination. I learned about the Goodness of God, but I also learned about stark realities– the persecuted Church, war, famine, injustice–things that God wants me to confront, and endure, and lift to Him in prayer. And for every “gloomy” reality, there are stories of victory and joy, faith and resilience, love and grace– because God is standing by, ready to rescue and reassure and redeem.

Bedtime prayers are a great comfort to me now. And they are also important prayers in my Christian Walk. It is at bedtime that I can reflect on God’s goodness throughout the day. I can be thankful for all the blessings God has given me, and for all the ways He has guided me and protected me– often without my knowledge and in spite of myself! Instead of worrying, tossing and turning, trying to “figure out” tomorrow, I can lift my burdens to God, knowing that I won’t face anything tomorrow alone! I can reflect on all the times I thought I couldn’t make it, but God made a way! And I can confidently rest in the hope that nothing can separate me from God’s loving care. Not yesterday’s guilt, nor today’s failures, nor tomorrow’s unknown (or imagined) trials– not even death!

I am old enough now that mortality plays a bigger role in my thoughts. I have lost my parents, my grandparents, aunts and uncles, classmates, co-workers, neighbors, and friends. I’ve experienced both great joy and great sorrow. But I need not be afraid of disease, dilemmas, or death. I need not worry about the state of my soul. I may have griefs, aches and pains, and worries about tomorrow. But I can “lay me down” in peace and patience, knowing I have a Good, Good Father whose love has surrounded me for over half a century. I can “Hush” all my fears, and sleep like a baby, knowing my God is always standing right by my side.

Who Are We Feeding?

“An old Cherokee man told his grandson, ‘..My boy, there is a great battle between two wolves that live inside us all. One is evil–it is anger, jealousy, greed, lies, resentment, regret, and arrogance. The other is good– it is joy, love, peace, hope, kindness, humility, empathy, and truth.’ The boy thought for awhile, and then he asked, ‘ Grandfather, which wolf wins the great battle?’ The wise old man replied quietly, ‘The one you feed.'”

The Story of the Two Wolves– a Cherokee legend

 “Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. 21 Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be. 22 “Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light. 23 But when your eye is unhealthy, your whole body is filled with darkness. And if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is! 24 “No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money. 25 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? 27 Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?28 “And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, 29 yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. 30 And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? 31 “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33 Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

Matthew 6:19-33 NLT

Just a short while ago, I published a blog entry called, “You Are Not What You Eat.” But sometimes, you DO become what you consume. I’m not talking literally about food, but figuratively you become what you read, and listen to, and spend time and money on– what you consume can end up consuming You!

“Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”

― Lao Tzu

Just like the two wolves in the Cherokee legend, there are two forces at work inside us. The Bible calls them “flesh” and “spirit.” The Apostle Paul also writes about this great battle:

15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. 17 So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.

Romans 7:15-20 ESV

We all start with “good intentions.” We want to be known as a “good person.” We want to have healthy relationships. We want the trust and respect of others. But Sin works in us against our own good intentions. We get hurt, so we lash out in anger. We see others achieving success or enjoying benefits we think we should have, and we become envious or resentful. We allow fear, greed, or bitterness to overpower us. We lie, or we isolate ourselves from others. We give up in despair, or reject the help and advice of those who want what’s best for us. We rely on our own resources and “will power” to achieve success, even to lose weight– but we always seem to fall short! We compare ourselves to others– sometimes ending in arrogance and apathy, sometimes ending in shame and humiliation.

But the battleground is not always so obvious as arrogance or despair, hurting others or being victimized. Who are we feeding in those moments of relaxation and ease? Are we scrolling through websites that waste our valuable time or encourage us to devalue others around us? Are we listening to music that encourages us to anger and pleasing ourselves at any expense? Are we reading books or watching movies that honor God? Are we spending money in ways that please Him? Are we spending our “down” time on our knees? Who are we feeding when times are tough? Are we spending time worrying or scurrying around trying to “make things happen” a certain way? Are we grateful, or fearful? Are we terrified or trusting? Our small choices in things that don’t seem to matter can start to change the way we think, and speak, act, and live.

There IS a great battle. But there are also tiny battles in the little moments of our day: opportunities to inch closer to God or to lose ground to the distractions and temptations of the world. And on our own, we will lose the battle, for the “flesh” will conspire to steal even the “good” food we think we are feeding ourselves. Thankfully, Christ came to feed the “good wolf.” In following Christ; in developing a relationship with Him, we allow His Spirit to nourish us. He is the “bread of life.” He is the “living water.” He alone provides the power to win the battle. Paul follows up in Romans by saying:

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. 29 For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. 30 And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.

Romans 8 26-30 ESV

So who are we feeding today? Or rather, who is feeding us? What are we consuming, and is it consuming us in turn? I hope we are feeding on God’s Word today, and walking with Him in each moment– whether in quiet reflection or in desperate need. May we be nourished and satisfied as we walk forward with Him!

Fitting In

(Today, I am revising a post from a couple of years ago.)

Matthew 5:1-12 (NIV via biblegateway.com):

Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, and he began to teach them.

The Beatitudes

He said:

“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn,
    for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek,
    for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
    for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful,
    for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
    for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
    for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

No one likes to feel “left out.” We have a deep desire to be accepted, liked, loved, respected, and needed. We want to “fit in.” But sometimes, acceptance and inclusion are not possible. Sometimes, they are offered, but at a price too steep. Sometimes, we make unhealthy compromises in our efforts to avoid conflict or to win respect.

In His Sermon on the Mount, Jesus gave us at least seven principles/actions that will bring us blessing. But they are in opposition to human nature– NOT designed to help us “fit in” with most of society. Elsewhere in scripture, we are told to stand apart from what others are doing or saying. God wants people who will follow HIM, not the world.

  • People who are poor in spirit— this can be taken at least two ways: those who consider themselves poor in a material sense, and hold their money and possessions lightly; or those who are aware of their spiritual poverty, knowing that they need guidance and wisdom from above. Such people are humble–not pushy, not arrogant, not greedy, not spending time proving how clever or wealthy they are. Such people will “possess” the kingdom of heaven– not by fighting and straining and striving and grasping for sole ownership–it is God’s gracious gift to be shared by all who are poor in spirit.
  • People who mourn–not people who are eternally gloomy and depressed, but those who mourn the loss of innocence, the injustices of the world, the suffering and grief of others. Such people also rejoice at the sight of a glorious sunrise, or laugh to see children playing– but they do not deny or circumvent the realities of a fallen world. They face facts–even when those facts are convicting, grievous, and painful. And they do not react with denial or distraction, with outrage or disinterest. They mourn. Such people will be comforted, even in the midst of mourning, by God’s sovereignty and righteousness.

  • People who are meek –there is a difference between being meek and lacking confidence or being a stooge or a fool. Meek people still have boundaries– and they respect the boundaries of others. They stand up for what is right, but they don’t insist on always being “right.” Such people will not stake a claim on the earth or try to grab their “fair share.” Instead, they will inherit all that God has in store for them! Notice the parallel with those who are “poor in spirit.” Meekness and humility are despised by the proud and the loud. But they are respected and honored by God, and sought out by people of discernment. Some of the greatest leaders are not bombastic and dictatorial, but humble and wise in creating success for everyone around them– not just themselves!
  • People who hunger and thirst for righteousness–hunger and thirst are natural and ongoing processes. There are people who want “justice” or “righteousness.” They want it NOW. They want it to be retroactive. They want it to be a foregone conclusion. And they want it to be eternal. But they don’t long for personal righteousness, and they don’t want to feel hunger or thirst for it. They don’t want to seek after true righteousness; they just want the results. They just want the world to spin righteously all around them. But for those who hunger and thirst– Jesus is both the Living Water and the Bread of Life. He brings a daily portion of all-sufficient Grace, wisdom, and forgiveness to keep us filled.

  • People who are merciful–I was struck as I read this again by the term merciful. We spend a lot of time and energy talking about God’s Grace– the fact that God gives us untold blessings that we don’t deserve. But here, Jesus is talking about the merciful– not giving others the condemnation or punishment they deserve. I find it much easier to be Graceful than to be Merciful. It is easy to bless others; to be charitable, or charming, encouraging, or bountiful. It is much more difficult to bite back an insulting or critical retort, to forgive a debt, to let go of a grudge, or keep from passing on a juicy morsel of gossip. It is easier to focus on the Golden Rule of doing unto others as you would like them to do unto you, than to Love your enemies. Jesus asked us to do both– but the blessing here is for those who show Mercy!
  • People who are pure in heart–not just shiny on the surface. I can say all manner of spiritual-sounding things; I can do all kinds of good deeds; I can even write blog entries on scriptural truths– but God looks on my heart, to see if it is pure. And if I haven’t covered my heart in posturing and false rituals, justifications and excuses, denials and rebellion, I should be able to “see” God– to have a clearer picture of who He is, what He is doing in the world around me, what He wants me to do and say and become…And other will be able to see God reflected in my words and actions, as well!
  • People who are peacemakers–not just people who “go along to get along,” but people who are willing to help bring about peace, and who will create an atmosphere of unity and respect–at home, in the workplace, and in their neighborhoods. When we bring peace to a chaotic relationship, or create a peaceful atmosphere, we are doing the work of reconciliation, and we are showing others the nature of our Father.
  • When we cultivate (or allow God’s Spirit to cultivate) these characteristics in our lives, we will not “fit in” with the world around us. We will stand out and stand apart. And that will make us targets for persecution, abuse, misunderstanding, insults, and false accusations. But we can be encouraged, not only because of the blessings Jesus promises in the Beatitudes, but in the reminder that we stand in very good company. We may not fit in at the office; we may be ostracized by our family; we may be targeted in our community– but we fit in with a host of prophets, apostles, saints, and with Christ Himself!

No More Goodbyes

Today marks 25 years since I said “goodbye” to my father. My mother, sister, and I stood by his bedside at the hospital. The doctors had tried numerous times to re-start his heart. In the process, they had broken his sternum, and each new effort was causing additional pain and putting his lungs in danger of being punctured by bone fragments. His time was running out. We were allowed to come in and say our last words to him, before his worn-out heart finally stopped for good. I held his hand one last time, whispered that I loved him and that I would help take care of Mom. I kissed his forehead, and said a prayer. Mom and my sister did the same.

Earlier this year, I had to say goodbye to Mom as well. My sister and I were with her, and had read her mail aloud to her, as she had fallen into a coma. I was preparing to return home. I said, “goodbye;” I held her hand, kissed her cheek and turned to my sister. When I turned back around, Mom was gone–her oxygen machine was still running, but her heart had stopped beating, and she was peaceful and still. In that moment, I became an orphan.


Death is part of the curse of a fallen world. God is the source of all Life. In a fallen world, we are cut off from our life-source. Our mortal bodies must taste death. It is the consequence of Sin– our sin, and the sins of others. Disease, violence, aging, disasters, grieving, work, abuse– all conspire to drain the life out of our bodies. Life is a gift– we can’t “earn” it, and we can’t “hold on” to it indefinitely. Nor can we hold on to the lives of others–even those we love. Some day, I will lose my sister. Or she will lose me. Some day, I will lose, or be lost to my husband, my brother, my step-children, mother-in-law, grandchildren, cousins, friends, and neighbors.


And, just like leaves on the trees later this month, all of us will grow old, be changed, and fall into decay. Some will fall gently; others will be torn away by the winds of war, or crime, or cancer, or accidents. Some will fall early; others will cling to life until the last moment, but all will eventually die. More goodbyes. More grieving. More death.


But. God is the author of Life, not Death.


Death is not the end for those who have trusted their souls to God. Our bodies must still taste death. We must still say, “Goodbye” to those we love on earth. But our goodbyes are tempered with the promise that the One who conquered Death did so for US. Because Jesus was willing to die and able to rise again, we will also live again. And THIS life will be untainted and eternal. No more goodbyes. No more grieving and separation. No more fear of an unknown future that includes death. No more waiting. No more living without a father. Our Heavenly Father will never leave, never die, never suffer the ravages of age or disease, never fall. In fact, Jesus never said “Goodbye” to His disciples– it wasn’t in His vocabulary! He said that He would “Go to prepare a place…(John 14:2-3)”, and He charged His disciples to “Go into all the world…(Mark 16:15)” But He never said, “Goodbye!”

I had to say, “Goodbye,” to my wonderful parents. And I have the joy of knowing that our “goodbyes” are temporary. That I will see them again, even as I will see my Heavenly Father someday. So, while today holds in it the sadness of watching my Dad suffer in his last minutes of earthly life, it also holds the promise of reunion and restoration. My Dad will never again have to suffer; neither will my Mom. My future probably holds a few more “goodbyes.” But it also holds “Hello!” “Welcome Home!” and “I’m so happy to see you again!”

Photo by Polina Zimmerman on Pexels.com

I thank God for the lives of both my parents– for their testimonies of faith, for their good examples, and for the wisdom, laughter, and love they shared. And I thank God that their deaths were not the end of that love and joy. In fact, it will be even better to share someday what we could never have here on earth–eternal peace and freedom from grief and loss.

Twenty-five years seems like a long time, but it is a drop in the bucket of time, and nothing in light of eternity. That truth brings me great comfort as I face today. I hope you will be encouraged and comforted as well. Heaven is a place with no more “goodbyes.” And that radically changes the way I say “Goodbye” here on earth!

Driven to Pray?

I met up with an old schoolmate last week, and he asked a question that made me think a lot. He wondered whether our generation– specifically our classmates and friends, were “driven.” His observation was that many of his nieces and nephews seem to have a lot of drive and ambition that he doesn’t remember seeing (or experiencing) in our youth. He noted that few of our friends have gone on to become lawyers or doctors, engineers or CEOs.

I wasn’t sure how to answer his observation. I started, but didn’t complete, a master’s degree. I know several of our friends who are teachers, paralegals, and business owners. Many have what most people would consider at least moderately “successful” lives– happy families, rewarding careers, the respect of others in their communities. And yet very few have distinguished themselves on the national or international front– aside, perhaps, from him! He is a tenured professor, with several published books, and has studied and/or taught at several universities around the world. If HE can’t remember being driven or ambitious, how does he explain his own “success?”

But the observation struck a nerve with me on a personal level. I know that many of my former classmates and long-time friends may find it odd that I have “settled” for the life I live. I own a business, but it is a modest one. I have taught and worked in libraries, but I could have chosen to become a professor or administrator or library director; I could have taken any of a number of more “important” or lucrative positions over the years. But I wasn’t driven to “succeed” in that way. Did I waste my potential? Was I lazy or fearful of success? Did I not have the potential, or did I not have the drive to become “more” than what I am?

Ultimately, I am driven (I hope) by the Holy Spirit. Not to become a “successful” person by the world’s standards, or even by my own ambitions, but to become the person God made me to be– a person who reflects His character and His priorities. I hope that I am becoming a “successful” follower of Christ– no matter what that looks like on the surface to classmates, neighbors, or family. I don’t need to be rich, famous, popular, or “important.” I DO need to be developing Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control (Galatians 5:22-23)

This week, as I have been meditating on the idea of “drive” and ambition and “success,” I started thinking about how it relates to prayer. I am driven to become more like Christ, and that includes being driven to live a life of prayer. But what really drives my prayer life? Because my pursuit of prayer and my practice of prayer may be “driven” by something other than pure motives:

  • Am I driven to pray because I believe that I am “ticking a box?” Have I read the Bible today? Check. Have I prayed some kind of prayer at some point? Check. Have I done a random act of kindness? Check. This is not really a spiritual pursuit of prayer. In fact, it can become idolatry– I can pray because I believe the act of praying makes me “better” or “good enough” to deserve God’s forgiveness or mercy. This drive comes from my own desire to control my growth and behavior. It is not “wrong” to set goals or make lists and stick to them. (After all, we are to be developing discipline and self-control!) But we must be careful not to shift our priorities from God’s discipline to our own lists and habits.
  • Am I driven to pray when/because others are watching? Am I seeking their approval more than I am seeking God’s face? Am I seeking to be “important” or pious, when God is asking me to be humble and obedient?
  • Perhaps I am praying out of fear, worry, or doubt. I am driven to pray in the same way that others are driven to consult a horoscope or carry a “lucky charm.” God wants me to trust Him. He knows that I will not always be perfect in Faith, but my prayers should not be double-minded (see James chapter one). I should not be using prayer to “hedge my bets” when faced with adversity. It is good to call out to God if we are frightened or uncertain, but we must develop Faith over fear. And in the end, God also wants us to be joyful in remembering and trusting in His promises
  • Am I driven by guilt or shame? It is good to confess our sins. But we also have to remember that IF we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us, and to cleanse us (1 John 1:9). If I am still confessing the same sins over and over, is it because I didn’t really trust God to forgive me, or because I didn’t really want to repent and change my ways– I just wanted a “free pass” to keep sinning, but not feel guilty for the consequences?
  • Maybe I am driven to pray for others because I think MY prayers can save them, or influence their life. Again, this can become idolatry. We have been given the amazing opportunity to pray for others. God already knows their needs– better than we can! And God can do miracles without any input from us. Yet He chooses to give us the privilege of praying and participating in His work! Again, it is commanded that we pray for one another, but we must remember to Whom we are praying. Our prayers for others are part of a circle– God’s Spirit moves us to compassion and concern– we take that compassion and lift up others before His throne. He knows what is best; He will do what is best. He wants us to participate, not to dictate!
  • Sometimes, I may be driven to “dictate” a particular outcome in my own life. My own ambition may be to become what I want, rather than what God wants for me. This can be a tricky concept. There are ambitions that God lays on our hearts– they are not wrong, but God’s timing may not match ours. I prayed for years to be married; to “find” the “right” mate, and to “be” the right mate. I even prayed that God would change my heart if my ambition was “wrong.” God’s timing was certainly not my timing. The ambition was not wrong, but my patience and trust needed to be developed.
  • Perhaps I am NOT driven to pray…maybe I lack the focus or lack the drive in my walk with Christ because I am drifting away from my first Love. I am driven to seek after something other than intimacy with my Creator. Maybe I am so content with my life “as it is” that I am not seeking direction and correction from the Holy Spirit. Perhaps I do not have the compassion and drive to pray for others because I do not see them fully as God sees them. Perhaps I do not trust God fully with the “little” things in my life because I do not see my need for His guidance.

I think it is not a bad thing to wrestle periodically with questions like this. Maybe today is the right time to ask, “Am I driven to pray? What drives me to my knees? What should be driving me there?”

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